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Post Reply Is it wrong to ask if someone changed gender
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Posted 6/10/16

KarenAraragi wrote:

I think you should tell both your closest friends and the person you are going to fuck.


Why do you think it's crucial that the person tells their closest friends that they're trans?
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Posted 6/10/16
Java Jophar on topic: No its not wrong, but be careful where you set your foot.

Posted 6/10/16
If you can't have communication and honesty in a relationship then why start one at all?
Posted 6/10/16 , edited 6/10/16

Nalaniel wrote:


KarenAraragi wrote:

I think you should tell both your closest friends and the person you are going to fuck.


Why do you think it's crucial that the person tells their closest friends that they're trans?


They are your friends are they not? Is their trust in their friends is that poor, that mean their closest friends aren't really that close to them.
I will like to know. I mean I am your friend and while I think you have the right to keep things to yourself. I will be both offended and sad that my friend can't trust me. It does hurt when your friend doesn't trust you. It not the end of the world but it hurts you know not to be trusted by your friend.
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Posted 6/10/16
No
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Posted 6/10/16

KarenAraragi wrote:

They are your friends are they not? Is their trust in their friends is that poor, that mean their closest friends aren't really that close to them.
I will like to know. I mean I am your friend and while I think you have the right to keep things to yourself. I will be both offended and sad that my friend can't trust me. It does hurt when your friend doesn't trust you. It not the end of the world but it hurts you know not to be trusted by your friend.


How is their trans status relevant to the friendship? Some people prefer to keep their past or medical history secret. Would you feel the same way if a friend of yours was in an abusive relationship before they met you, but they didn't tell you and you found out through someone else?
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Posted 6/10/16
Well if it's someone you have a crush on or something then of course it's not wrong. But I think it's best for them to tell you themselves rather than going up to them and say "were you a dude before or are you a transgender?" . Also if they trying to be a female it probably won't be a good idea to tell them they resemble a man, right?.
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Posted 6/10/16

Nalaniel wrote:
They are your friends are they not?
sometimes its nice to know (depends who you are with etc)
and agree not everyone should know it of how negative or they don't really know how to feel or think about it.

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Posted 6/10/16
Ask if they pee standing up or sitting down.
Posted 6/10/16

Nalaniel wrote:


KarenAraragi wrote:

They are your friends are they not? Is their trust in their friends is that poor, that mean their closest friends aren't really that close to them.
I will like to know. I mean I am your friend and while I think you have the right to keep things to yourself. I will be both offended and sad that my friend can't trust me. It does hurt when your friend doesn't trust you. It not the end of the world but it hurts you know not to be trusted by your friend.


How is their trans status relevant to the friendship? Some people prefer to keep their past or medical history secret. Would you feel the same way if a friend of yours was in an abusive relationship before they met you, but they didn't tell you and you found out through someone else?


Sight..... Is not about being relevant or not. Is that how you view things that just sad. Sorry but the last one is neither here nor there. Especially if that you're follow up after your initial defensive response. That last one can be applied to anything and is does nothing for your argument here. Honestly, that feel more like an excuse to run a way from what I saying.


PS I not doing this. Listing I got things to do and I rather be doing that, than being here with somebody being defensive about something. No offense to you.
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Posted 6/10/16 , edited 6/10/16
It all depends on the relationship. If you're just friends with a person, it will be rude to ask such a question. There are things that some people do not wish to discuss for various reasons and it's not all to do with mistrusting their friends. Even if you do ask, you are not entitled to a an answer. It may sadden a friend to find out there's something they didn't know about their friend but it would be kind of selfish of the sad friend to assume it's all about themselves not being trustworthy enough.

Now if it's someone you are dating and have reached the stage that you both wish to have a long term relationship, this question may be pertinent. If you both want children this is a necessary disclosure to discuss. If there's any health issue regarding sexual function this needs to be talked about too. Add to this if a couple want to marry this needs to be mentioned because when bringing up documentation some old documents will list the old gender and there are still some places where legal marriage is not allowed or does not have exceptions for transexuals.

Here's another thing to think about. What if a person was born physically intersex/hermaphrodite? What if a person just has a unisex look? They may get upset of being asked such a question or even feel insulted.
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Posted 6/10/16

Xxanthar wrote:
Ask if they pee standing up or sitting down.
what if they do both? XD

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Posted 6/10/16 , edited 6/10/16

KarenAraragi wrote:

Sight..... Is not about being relevant or not. Is that how you view things that just sad. Sorry but the last one is neither here nor there. Especially if that you're follow up after your initial defensive response. That last one can be applied to anything and is does nothing for your argument here. Honestly, that feel more like an excuse to run a way from what I saying.

PS I not doing this. Listing I got things to do and I rather be doing that, than being here with somebody being defensive about something. No offense to you.


Um, okay... I try to have a conversation about this topic with you and the first thing you do is state that my point of view is "sad". Then you go on how I'm being defensive and running away from what you've said. Makes sense.
Posted 6/10/16

Xxanthar wrote:

Ask if they pee standing up or sitting down.


this made me laugh
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Posted 6/10/16
Why is this such a popular topic?
I have seen 2 threads before this...
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