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Post Reply We gotta Clean up dem ocieans samhow
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23 / M / California
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Posted 6/10/16
The oceans are a bunch of dirty, smelly piles of gross water and dumb slimy swimmers, so we got to do something about it. Fortunately, I have some ingenious ideas for doing just that.

1. Vacuum it
If that ocean's so dirty, then you can go to the store, buy a trillion bafjillion wet-dry vacs, and vacuum the floor. It's a really big floor though, so you might need a bunch of extension cords.

2. Wipe out all sea life

Fish are fast-moving shit generators who in turn will one day fall victims to the vices of time and start rotting. It's really gross. The best course of action then is to scoop up all sea life in a bunch of nets, and fire them into the sun. Without life in the ocean, you stop the pooping and dying. Then you can go back and vacuum the floor.

3. drain the ocean

We need it to live, but water is pretty gross in general; especially ocean water. Ocean water is so gross that it contains every element in a table, and there are a lot of tables that could be made out of gross ocean stuff. This measure is more to stop people from having to eat off of tables made of ocean.

4. Fill the space with ping pong balls

Once the fish and the floor and the water are all taken care of, there's going to be a lot of empty space left. You know how the saying goes. "Nature abhors empty spots", so fill that empty spot with some fun ping pong balls. Plastic doesn't break down, so you know it's clean. Nature will be happy too because the empty spot is filled.

5. Usher in a new era of peace and prosperity with the world's largest ball pit as your vanguard

There are two certainties in life; taxes and ball pits. It is a 100 percent fact that everyone on the planet loves ball pits. Ball pits are so universally loved that even dogs trust them. That means all the evil in the world would put its evil into rental storage units and hang out with the cool kids at the ball pit.

6. Everything should be pretty great now, so you can skip this step.
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Posted 6/10/16
You're genius.

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AKR
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Posted 6/10/16 , edited 6/10/16
We should send this to every government in the world.
This is just so fabulous.
Posted 6/10/16 , edited 6/10/16
I agree with these ideas

I think we should start up a community world wide event for vacuum the ocean floor.
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26 / F / Outer Orbit
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Posted 6/10/16
And best thing is, you can just hire the Underwear Gnomes to do it, so it will be pretty cheap.
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25 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 6/10/16
Where have you been?
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34 / M / Off the map.
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Posted 6/10/16
I thought I stubbed into something serious, but it seams to be all bark.
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23 / M / AZ
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Posted 6/10/16
Trump 2016!
Trump will clean our oceans!
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Posted 6/10/16
What 10 year old came up with this idea? that's funny. Clean up the ocean? Go visit Fukushima and tell me oceans will be clean. That place is essentially Chernobyl out there. it's a waste land and uninhabitable.
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22 / Hakoniwa Academy
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Posted 6/10/16
I'm all for a massive ball pit, that sounds like fun.
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33 / M
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Posted 6/10/16
In all seriousness...China dumps a shit-ton of mercury into the ocean and that shit is a problem for more than just their seas and the ocean waters near them.
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23 / M / California
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Posted 6/10/16

Gunsmith_Girl wrote:

What 10 year old came up with this idea? that's funny. Clean up the ocean? Go visit Fukushima and tell me oceans will be clean. That place is essentially Chernobyl out there. it's a waste land and uninhabitable.


That's not a bad start on Japan's part. Radiation. Very sanitary, and if your postulations on it's effectiveness are correct, we can skip the firing fish into the sun part entirely! We'll just reserve that bit of superheated honor for the sea mammals.
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23 / M / California
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Posted 6/10/16

qualeshia3 wrote:

Where have you been?


With a girl... and Tumblr. At least 70 percent Tumblr.
Posted 6/10/16
vacuum them up and filter them out
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Posted 6/10/16

Lethargic_leopard_Seal wrote:
That's not a bad start on Japan's part. Radiation. Very sanitary, and if your postulations on it's effectiveness are correct, we can skip the firing fish into the sun part entirely! We'll just reserve that bit of superheated honor for the sea mammals.



They could of used Hemp and Cannabis leaves which can cleanse the environment there on the beaches, and beyond. But it's illegal there. So much for logical, inexpensive and effective use of tax payer money. I got cancer from that which i'm still fighting. It's in remission but doctors found cancer cells multiplying in my other lung that is untouched. It's metastasizing. My fiance's mother died from this kind of cancer. I'm coughing up blood again which is a sign it's festering up. But that's okay. I lived a happy life. I have a lot to be thankful. If the good Lord wants to take me, I welcome it. Sometimes I just get too tired fighting this.
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