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Post Reply If you're afraid of growing old, here's why you shouldn't be
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23 / M / California
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Posted 6/27/16
You know who's old? Your grandpa, and your grandma. Some are potentially so old that they've become skeletons! This may not sound like a plus to you, but if you're ever raised from your pine casing, you'll want to come out as a skeleton with character! Young people don't die with beards!

You have to earn your beard through decades of bottled up hatred for things that aren't you! Each new portion of bitter resentment is a glorious new follicle upon your face! As a freshly raised skeleton, the necromancer in question will take one good look at the handsomely hairy skeletons with at least three digits of life under their belts and appoint them as undead generals!

If you grow old, you can be assured that your flowing white face mane will be the first tendrils of the rattling dead that the living will feel upon their faces as you and your sun-bleached comrades descend upon your excrement-soaked prey! You will be the first to strip bare their vestments of the mortal coil, and the first to breath unlife into their crimson bones!

Through fire and rising tides of pestilent airs, the bearded bone will ride, drumming out the rhythm of death's march with each clacking footfall. Will you grow old to one day join the bearded, or will you grovel at their heels as calcified cannon fodder? Too clean-faced to even look the bearded in their eye sockets, the young dead will be but dust in the wind that blows the beardeds' beards aloft.

Grow old! Grow to resent the young so you may take up leadership roles within the undead convent!

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33 / M / So Cali, OC
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Posted 6/27/16
^ I cant grow a beard even if my life depended on it. At most I get pubes looking things out of my chin
Posted 6/28/16
I won't take advice from someone younger than me
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21 / M / oregon
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Posted 6/28/16
I grow facial hair easily without being an old person and I'd rather not see my hair grey and my skin wrinkle.
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26 / M / UK
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Posted 6/28/16
As a level 42 necromancer, I heartily approve of this thread!

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19 / M
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Posted 6/28/16

Yohannbear wrote:

^ I cant grow a beard even if my life depended on it. At most I get pubes looking things out of my chin


I have the opposite problem, I started growing a beard when I was 16, and I've been shaving since I was 17 lmfaoo. Middle Eastern genes are annoying, i'm considering getting laser hair removal on my beard.
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Posted 6/28/16 , edited 6/28/16

Lethargic_leopard_Seal wrote:

You know who's old? Your grandpa, and your grandma. Some are potentially so old that they've become skeletons! This may not sound like a plus to you, but if you're ever raised from your pine casing, you'll want to come out as a skeleton with character! Young people don't die with beards!

You have to earn your beard through decades of bottled up hatred for things that aren't you! Each new portion of bitter resentment is a glorious new follicle upon your face! As a freshly raised skeleton, the necromancer in question will take one good look at the handsomely hairy skeletons with at least three digits of life under their belts and appoint them as undead generals!

If you grow old, you can be assured that your flowing white face mane will be the first tendrils of the rattling dead that the living will feel upon their faces as you and your sun-bleached comrades descend upon your excrement-soaked prey! You will be the first to strip bare their vestments of the mortal coil, and the first to breath unlife into their crimson bones!

Through fire and rising tides of pestilent airs, the bearded bone will ride, drumming out the rhythm of death's march with each clacking footfall. Will you grow old to one day join the bearded, or will you grovel at their heels as calcified cannon fodder? Too clean-faced to even look the bearded in their eye sockets, the young dead will be but dust in the wind that blows the beardeds' beards aloft.

Grow old! Grow to resent the young so you may take up leadership roles within the undead convent!



So you expect women to be growing beards too?
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21 / M / Alaska
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Posted 6/28/16

Lethargic_leopard_Seal wrote:

You know who's old? Your grandpa, and your grandma. Some are potentially so old that they've become skeletons! This may not sound like a plus to you, but if you're ever raised from your pine casing, you'll want to come out as a skeleton with character! Young people don't die with beards!

You have to earn your beard through decades of bottled up hatred for things that aren't you! Each new portion of bitter resentment is a glorious new follicle upon your face! As a freshly raised skeleton, the necromancer in question will take one good look at the handsomely hairy skeletons with at least three digits of life under their belts and appoint them as undead generals!

If you grow old, you can be assured that your flowing white face mane will be the first tendrils of the rattling dead that the living will feel upon their faces as you and your sun-bleached comrades descend upon your excrement-soaked prey! You will be the first to strip bare their vestments of the mortal coil, and the first to breath unlife into their crimson bones!

Through fire and rising tides of pestilent airs, the bearded bone will ride, drumming out the rhythm of death's march with each clacking footfall. Will you grow old to one day join the bearded, or will you grovel at their heels as calcified cannon fodder? Too clean-faced to even look the bearded in their eye sockets, the young dead will be but dust in the wind that blows the beardeds' beards aloft.

Grow old! Grow to resent the young so you may take up leadership roles within the undead convent!



what a bout the ladies? they don't get beards
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Posted 6/28/16
wasnt
Sogno- 
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Posted 6/28/16
im already old, what's there to be afraid of anymore
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18 / M / Reality
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Posted 6/28/16 , edited 6/28/16
Growing old sounds boring, might as well die young
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23 / M / Beyond The Wall
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Posted 6/28/16
I honestly want to die before 50,I see no point in withering away. I feel the same was as the Old Orc in Skyrim.
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23 / M / California
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Posted 6/28/16


So you expect women to be growing beards too?

Goddamn right I do.
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Posted 6/28/16
What bullshit are you spouting, young blood?

It's like you're speaking some nonsense-enchanting spells that happens to be in English.
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23 / M / California
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Posted 6/28/16

stoner789 wrote:



what a bout the ladies? they don't get beards


Not with that attitude!
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