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Post Reply When did you stop being a nice person?
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20 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 7/9/16 , edited 7/21/16
So wondering when everyone else stopped for me it was in highschool in primary school i was known for my good manners and how polite and how well i followed instructions etc.

My Parents and teachers etc always said i was one of the kindest people they knew which looking back would have been true however i really hated how i was because i was nice to others without meaning to be it is just part of who i am.

I was bullied all the way through primary school and only got on well with Adults and Female class mates guys were always rude, when it got to highschool i was also for the first year or so then i discovered why people were bullying me.

People saw my kindness as weak and thought it was fun to pick on someone who is polite so i toned down my manners and stopped being nice to everyone (which takes a conscious effort to do so) and the bullying went down so life was bearable.

That's my experience anyhow but do any of you also act like more of a jerk towards people and more unkind because of how people respond to you i want to know.




(Also i failed tonight i ended up holding a door open for numerous strangers all who wouldn't stop thanking me ...T_T)
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17 / M / Middle of Nowhere...
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Posted 7/9/16 , edited 7/23/16
It's not that being nice makes you weak it's about not taking shit from other people and standing up for yourself. Just like most people I will act nice and courteous but if you're an asshole to me expect me to be an asshole back. If anything I think you're more weak for forcing yourself to change who you are in order to respond to other people. Being nice is a good thing and if you can't see that well don't expect to get very far my dude.
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20 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 7/9/16 , edited 7/9/16

Mrflyingmongoose123 wrote:

It's not that being nice makes you weak it's about not taking shit from other people and standing up for yourself. Just like most people I will act nice and courteous but if you're an asshole to me expect me to be an asshole back. If anything I think you're more weak for forcing yourself to change who you are in order to respond to other people. Being nice is a good thing and if you can't see that well don't expect to get very far my dude.


Hmm i didn't take shit from people and i still got bullied i kept changing variables till i changed me being nice to a jerk and people stopped bullying me and people started wanting to hang out with me girls started being interested in me and even dated me etc.

I'm glad that i don't have to suffer anymore because of how others perceive me

Trust me with the amount of bullying i went through as a kid not even the strongest person on earth would just let it keep going.

Being nice is good depending on the time well according to what i have noticed from people im still studying ques and when to be nice or a jerk etc.
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26 / M / Socal
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Posted 7/9/16 , edited 9/14/16
when I decided that I'm just a person, both nice and mean.
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Posted 7/9/16

pandrasb wrote:

when I decided that I'm just a person, both nice and mean.


so you decided to be 50/50 instead of the normal 80/20 that most people seem to usually be? or?
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Posted 7/9/16
I stopped around middle school

I wasn't exactly bullied but i wasn't treated nice either. I have really bad mosquito scars all over my legs and i would be really insecure (they are now slowly fading away. its still there but not as bad as they used to be) so i would always wear pants and stuff. I wouldn't get bullied for it, I just hated it when people will point it out or talk about it or try to give me advice about getting treatment.

I didn't want to seem as if i was embarrassed by it so I started being mean and earned myself a bully title in high school. I wouldn't hurt people's feelings on purpose, only when someone tries to make fun of me or be mean. So I wouldn't get in trouble or anything unless someone crosses the line and I end up socking someone's jaw (but that's a different story).

BTW bullying is a terrible thing so I feel bad for what happened to you. I guess where I come from bullying wasn't really a common thing.
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Posted 7/9/16 , edited 7/10/16
I have never stopped being a nice person.

I'm considerate and well mannered, and hold the door open for people (anyone - doesn't need to just be women or disabled or anything).

it doesn't mean I'm weak, or a carpet to get walked all over, or in any other way to be treat like a fool.
I can and do bite back if you try to take advantage of my politeness. I just don't see the point in being an arse just because I can.

it boils down to if you are decent reasonable and courteous to me, then I'll continue being the same to you.

Life's too short to worry about what idiots think. Ignore them and move on. Their loss, not yours.
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Posted 7/9/16

stuntie wrote:

I have never stopped being a nice person.

I'm considerate and well mannered, and hold the door open for people (anyone - doesn't need to just be women or disabled or anything).

it doesn't mean I'm weak, or a carpet to get walked all over, or in any other way to be treat like a fool.
I can and do bite back if you try to take advantage of my politeness. I just don't see the point in being an arse just because I can.

it boils down to if you are decent reasonable and courteous to me, then I'll continue being the same to you.

Life's too short to worry about what idiots think. Ignore them and move on. Their loss, not yours.


I'm jealous i wish i could ignore people and not care what others thing i have tried all my life and never been able to do either >.<
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17 / M / Middle of Nowhere...
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Posted 7/9/16
Different experiences I guess, I was bullied too but then I found some friends those people who were bulling me eventually went to go pick on some other people. With the help of those friends my confidence started to build up and I became more out going and I was eventually able to figure out who I really am. Now I have a ton of different friends and I could probably get a girlfriend too but no girls here like anime For me the bullies went away once I built up my confidence and I gained a group of people who I could hang out with.
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22 / M / Norway
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Posted 7/9/16
When I realized I never got anything back for it
I'm a filthy human being I know
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20 / M / Finland
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Posted 7/9/16
I was never nice in the first place
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20 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 7/9/16 , edited 7/9/16

Mrflyingmongoose123 wrote:

Different experiences I guess, I was bullied too but then I found some friends those people who were bulling me eventually went to go pick on some other people. With the help of those friends my confidence started to build up and I became more out going and I was eventually able to figure out who I really am. Now I have a ton of different friends and I could probably get a girlfriend too but no girls here like anime For me the bullies went away once I built up my confidence and I gained a group of people who I could hang out with.


I guess my problem is i'm more of an introvert and i like to follow orders and i don't understand people or social ques so me being kind allows people to take advantage of it easily.

I never got a group of friends or confidence i kind of wish i did but can't change the pass i guess i have a ton of friends now and people aren't mean to me anymore (mostly).


You know what i think im going to run an experiment...for a month im going to just be my normal self and not force myself to be what i see as ick.. so others like me then see the results as i'm now very curious about the data i could extract from such an experiment
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Posted 7/9/16
I stopped being nice to people I didn't know when I realized a couple of things.
1.People are assholes.
2.Being nice to people won't matter. Friendships don't last forever and after having every friend I've made disappear within 1 year I've given up.
3.It's easier being myself than faking being a nice person. I'm naturally antisocial and VERY introverted so I don't need to drain my energy for no reason.
I don't like other humans. People are pieces of shiet. They don't care about other people. As soon as I realized this I just stopped being nice to people. Why should I be nice to people and fake it if it won't even do anything?
In the end, the point of me writing this is this. BE YOURSELF. Don't care about what those asshats say. They're just that: asshats. They judge people because they're not confident enough to be proud of themselves, so instead they bring down those higher than them. Call me whatever you want but if some person says "OH KINDNESS IS WEAK GO BE MEAN AND BE A MAN" then that just means one thing. THEY'RE STUPID. Kindness isn't weakness. And standing up for yourself? There's a fine line between courage and stupidity. You have to realize this and wait for the opportunity to stand up for yourself.
Well I dunno why I'm adding to this forum but OH WELL. I'm gonna go play some games and watch some anime.
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Posted 7/9/16

Ryulightorb wrote:


pandrasb wrote:

when I decided that I'm just a person, both nice and mean.


so you decided to be 50/50 instead of the normal 80/20 that most people seem to usually be? or?


Whenever I feel like it basically, I'm nice if I'm feeling that way, or mean when I'm feel I want to be. But generally I am nice if I like you, or you're nice to me.
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20 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 7/9/16

pandrasb wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


pandrasb wrote:

when I decided that I'm just a person, both nice and mean.


so you decided to be 50/50 instead of the normal 80/20 that most people seem to usually be? or?


Whenever I feel like it basically, I'm nice if I'm feeling that way, or mean when I'm feel I want to be. But generally I am nice if I like you, or you're nice to me.


ah gotcha that makes sense.
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