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Post Reply Throw some ideas on how to turn someone down!!
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24 / M
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Posted 7/25/16
Just tell them. The worst thing you can do to a person is to not give them a clear answer.
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8500 / F / Apollo...
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Posted 7/25/16
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8500 / F / Apollo...
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Posted 7/25/16 , edited 7/25/16

Hairbelly wrote:


1stladyent wrote:

Would you give them a simple or complicated explanation?

Depends on the person. Normal, non-psycho people you can give simple, honest (must be honest) answers to and let them down humanly. Treat them as you'd like to the treated in a similar situation. "Pay it forward."

Psycho, stalker, clingy people are tougher. The real psychos, you don't owe shit to and the more you try to speak with them, the worse it will become. Don't lie to them (don't lie to anyone), but don't put yourself at risk either.

The slightly psycho people, which is like 93% of the human population, need simple, firm honest answers. You gotta be firm though. You have it thought out and don't buckle.

And don't use humor. Take them seriously. If you're honest, the non-psycho people will thank you years later. Truly. The slightly psycho people will think about you when they're having sex with the people they settled for.

The nutjobs will always hate you.



Holy shit, this!! Your wisdom applies to the slightly psycho ones. I think restraining orders might work better on the nutjobs though.
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8500 / F / Apollo...
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Posted 7/25/16

dreamy- wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


L7D wrote:

I would be very direct truth needs be said.


Holy shit this man gets it!


B-But I said the same thing too, friend I want your approval too!


It's ok, you have my approval I'm OP.
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17 / M / United States
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Posted 7/25/16
It's not you just me. Just kidding, it's you and I'm leaving your ass.
Posted 7/25/16

1stladyent wrote:


dreamy- wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


L7D wrote:

I would be very direct truth needs be said.


Holy shit this man gets it!


B-But I said the same thing too, friend I want your approval too!


It's ok, you have my approval I'm OP.


Thank you..............................................
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23 / M / Abyss
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Posted 7/25/16
I have had 2 experience with this (and one on me).

Normal girl: I don't see you the way you see me. I am sorry.
This worked fine.

Borderline stalker girl: I don't see you the way you see me. I am sorry.
She then found out where I lived, what I had in my house and various other things. She kept showing up and trying to do stuff with me.
Luckily I am an army brat and moved away half a year later.

When it was towards me: She just stared at me. My friend and his gf who tried to hook us up saved my ass and managed to salvage a bit of this. NOT RECCOMENDED This sucks.
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Posted 7/25/16
No point making it complicated by complex explanation or ignoring/avoiding it. Both of those make it worse than it needs to be. Just be honest and tell them how you feel as straightforward as possible so there are no misunderstandings.
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20 / F
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Posted 7/25/16
Be honest. Always just be honest. Talk to them in person (unless you're worried about your safety then either on the phone or bring a friend to loiter while you guys talk in private. Unless you absolutely cannot help it never use text messages or chat for these things, it's just not a good way to have important conversations and emotions and words can be taken in different interpretations than what you mean. Maybe it'll end a bit ugly for them, but if they are mature they'll respectfully understand. If you're both friends tell them that you should have some distance for a while to make it easier on them. It'll be quite some time before things are less awkward. But yea, tell them that it's not for you. This happens all the time with me. Just be polite, you don't need to 'try it out' to see if you change your mind unless that is something you actually want to do. Just tell them the truth respectfully, you're not interested. If you say no and they keep pushing then that's kinda a red flag and you should put your foot down hard. It's not being a bad person, you can't help the way you feel, it's a sucky situation but it's not your fault. Good luck and I hope everything works out.
Posted 7/25/16
"I'm gay."
"Fantastic! Because I'm really a boy." ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
"No, I meant, I'm gay as in happy."
"Well I have lady parts, and I can upset you if you like." ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
"I prefer being happy."
"Two jews walk into a bar..." ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
"I don't like anti-semitic jokes."
"But, they won the lottery." ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
"My mom died of a heart attack when she won the lottery."
"Do you need a mommy?" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
"OMFG, GO AWAY!"
[Takes one step back] "How's that?" ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Posted 7/25/16

1stladyent wrote:

do you just ignore or avoid the situation(s) altogether?



^ this is so me

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21 / M / U.S.A.
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Posted 7/25/16
Try telling them you aren't interested.
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15 / F / UK
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Posted 7/25/16
I would be straight up and truthfull, but make sure you dont leave them hanging if they are upset about it.
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39 / Inside your compu...
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Posted 7/25/16
Just say you don't have that kind of feelings for them.
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29 / M
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Posted 7/25/16
For someone who has this type of experience, don't be an ass. I done the being an ass part and push them away. Just be truthfully and in a kind manner to them. Will the relationship that you too have be the same maybe. Can't say for sure each person is different.
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