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A clothing question
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48 / M / New England, USA
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Posted 8/6/16
If she were to wear something like this to a night out clubbing with the girls I'd have no problem...



But if she wore something like this...



I'd definitely begin to question her loyalty and faithfulness and wonder if I was with someone trustworthy.
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20 / M / Imoutoland!
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Posted 8/6/16 , edited 8/6/16

neugenx wrote:

If she were to wear something like this to a night out clubbing with the girls I'd have no problem...



But if she wore something like this...



I'd definitely begin to question her loyalty and faithfulness and wonder if I was with someone trustworthy.


Who are the model in the bottom pictures and where may I buy such a dress?!
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34 / M / US
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Posted 8/6/16
I am attracted to women with a bit of class. The type of woman I'd be interested in in the first place would conduct herself in such a way that I would have no cause to worry. If she were the type of woman I had to worry about, she wouldn't be a woman I'd date in the first place.

That said, as a guy, I also like skin. And as a human being, I like to feel important. In a relationship it is a very nice thing to have some special things you share only with each other. To that end, I would like it very much if a woman I dated reserved something just for me - it doesn't really matter what, just something. I wouldn't care if she were to ride through the streets like Lady Godiva so long as she held something special for me and was loyal. Hell, I'd enjoy the show too!

In a romantic relationship people are supposed to be partners and they are supposed to be together because they love, respect, and enjoy each other. It isn't one S.O.'s place to tell the other what is or is not appropriate. A daughter on the other hand - THAT is a completely different story.
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19 / F
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Posted 8/6/16
Well, I don't know you or your girlfriend so I can't really say what I think you two should do but I, as a female, wouldn't really like to be told what to wear. I totally get your point, you don't want to risk anything. But I don't completely get why you don't want her to wear certain things whether it's because you don't trust her around other men or you don't trust the men around her or if just you don't like what she's wearing because you're conservative. I don't know. But I do know you're not her parent and you shouldn't worry about what she wears because that will just make her feel like you're being a parent instead of a boyfriend and that you're being controlling and that isn't the vibe you want in a relationship. I'm sure your intentions are good but I say let her wear what she wants. If someone says something about her clothes, defend her. If another guy hits on her because of her clothes, defend her and if you're not there, make sure you have enough trust built up so that you don't have to worry about her cheating. Personally, I don't wear revealing clothing at all for my own reasons but I know a lot of girls that go through hard struggles with body image and as soon as they start to wear clothes that show off some skin, they're shut down because of it. It can be super damaging and set someone back a bit in their progress. That could be the case with her but, as I said, I don't know.

Sorry about the long comment, I have a lot to say about a lot of things. Hope everything works out with your girlfriend.
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It doesn't matter.
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Posted 8/6/16 , edited 8/6/16
The logical thing to do is to make some bruises in the places you want her to cover up.
jk
Think about why this is important to you and talk to them about why it is.
If this is about a celebrity pushing summer fashion on the other side of the world when it's winter here, it's worth an intervention before someone gets pneumonia.
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26 / F
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Posted 8/6/16
If it's really cold and that's why somebody tells me to not wear something that shows a lot of skin (unrealistic because I don't wear these kind of clothes, just not my thing) it would be fine. If it's because my partner doesn't like it I would ignore it because it's my decision. And no woman on this planet is going to have an affair with another man because of the clothes she wears. If she wants to have sex with someone else she will be able to find someone while wearing a longer skirt. You don't really need stripper-clothes for that.
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21 / Australia
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Posted 8/6/16
Her choice but choices have consequences.
Posted 8/6/16 , edited 8/6/16
Well I thought about it. If you're too embarrassed to be around someone based on what they wear then you won't stand a chance when real issues pop up. If it's loyalty you're worried about and those worries continue for long enough the relationship wont last.

Personally I wouldn't mind a little cleavage or a little leg. I prefer a sweet wholesome girl though. They can show off cleavage and leg too but if we've got underboob going on or I can see her underwear at all times then I wont be interested in a relationship.
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21 / M / U.S.A.
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Posted 8/6/16 , edited 8/6/16
Let her do it. I lost a relationship because I was trying to be too controlling and losing my temper as such. If you're worried that she'd wear it in public and it would attract competition, I just have three words for you.

Trust is important.

If you don't think she'd brush off other guys while she's in a relationship with you, then why are you even with her? Perhaps she's wearing those clothes because it feels more comfortable, not because she wants to attract attention.
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Posted 8/6/16 , edited 8/6/16
Of course it varies from person to person, but I would note as a gross generalization that women tend to wear the more revealing/form fitting clothes when they are young and not carrying too much weight. It is my supposition that they do this to help attract a spouse (ducks and dodges rocks from my last comment). If you will notice, after women get married they tend to wear less form fitting clothes. Society tends to enforce this by comments like "She needs to act her age" or something similar. Tossed into this is the fact that everyone tends to gain weight as they age, so the form fitting clothes are "less flattering".

If you doubt what I just said, look at the fact that women constitute roughly half of the population, yet it seems like 80% of the clothing and shoe stores are for women. Why would women need so many more choices than men do? In addition to that, what constitutes beauty is different for different cultures.
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18 / M / Reality
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Posted 8/6/16
Not a fan of her showing off skin, that just sounds like she wants to have an affair/wants people to look at her like "that".
Posted 8/6/16

XxDarkSasuxX wrote:
Perhaps she's wearing those clothes because it feels more comfortable, not because she wants to attract attention.


I've heard people use this a lot and truly, I get it. But it's pretty silly to think that that person doesn't think she'd attract attention just because that's not what she wants... I'm a firm believer that people know what they want to achieve when they get dressed. It's one of the best ways that we can express ourselves, so I think that a girl going out knowing well that she's wearing something that will attract the attention of other men and that her bf disapproves of it has little to no respect for that relationship. I've seen it firsthand with a married friend. I can tell the difference when she's going out to flirt with guys and when she just wants to hang out with friends.
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19 / F / Earth
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Posted 8/6/16 , edited 8/7/16
I'm a girl.
I don't really wear clothes that show too much skin nor do I really like it.
But I also wouldn't want someone telling me what to wear or what not to wear.
& honestly it's not something that I think you or your girlfriend should argue over.
Unless she's going around in those clothes flirting with other men, you shouldn't worry too much.
At least that's what I think!
Posted 8/6/16 , edited 8/6/16

Rinrinrinn wrote:


XxDarkSasuxX wrote:
Perhaps she's wearing those clothes because it feels more comfortable, not because she wants to attract attention.


I've heard people use this a lot and truly, I get it. But it's pretty silly to think that that person doesn't think she'd attract attention just because that's not what she wants... I'm a firm believer that people know what they want to achieve when they get dressed. It's one of the best ways that we can express ourselves, so I think that a girl going out knowing well that she's wearing something that will attract the attention of other men and that her bf disapproves of it has little to no respect for that relationship. I've seen it firsthand with a married friend. I can tell the difference when she's going out to flirt with guys and when she just wants to hang out with friends.


I couldn't have said it better. I get she wants to "look cute" but there are a million other options that don't involve huge cleavage slits and shirts with no back when I'm not around. Clothing aside, having a "I'm going to do whatever I want regardless of what you want, say, or think" is incredibly disrespectful in a relationship. If that's your attitude when you are single so be it but it has no place in a relationship,
Posted 8/6/16

ResilientPsyche wrote:

I couldn't have said it better. I get she wants to "look cute" but there are a million other options that don't involve huge cleavage slits and shirts with no back when I'm not around. Clothing aside, having a "I'm going to do whatever I want regardless of what you want, say, or think" is incredibly disrespectful in a relationship. If that's your attitude when you are single so be it but it has no place in a relationship,


Unfortunately many people don't understand the importance of compromise in a relationship.
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