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Post Reply Biggest Fear in a relationship?
Posted 8/28/16
Infidelity.
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Posted 8/28/16
Them getting bored or me fucking it up. Which I'm great at. Also cheating, no one can seem to stay loyal or just dump the person instead of being deceitful.
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Posted 8/29/16

Ryulightorb wrote:


TheOmegaForce70941 wrote:

Hurting hur or something, idk lol


quietglasses wrote:

Being cheated on.


To fear being cheated on just means there's no real trust in the relationship from your side lol


Not true rather ignorant way to view things tbh


No it really isn't, basic psychology have proven multiple times that a relationship where one or both doesn't fully trust each other usually leads to either break up or being replaced. Having trust for someone is the most important thing in a relationship, sure psychology tests have been made on focus groups, however that doesn't mean it doesn't apply to most relationships
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Posted 8/29/16

TheOmegaForce70941 wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


TheOmegaForce70941 wrote:

Hurting hur or something, idk lol


quietglasses wrote:

Being cheated on.


To fear being cheated on just means there's no real trust in the relationship from your side lol


Not true rather ignorant way to view things tbh


No it really isn't, basic psychology have proven multiple times that a relationship where one or both doesn't fully trust each other usually leads to either break up or being replaced. Having trust for someone is the most important thing in a relationship, sure psychology tests have been made on focus groups, however that doesn't mean it doesn't apply to most relationships



so your saying as a person who will never trust anyone not even himself 100% a relationship is pointless or there is no real trust and it won't work?

hah don't make me laugh.

Trust is important but it's naive to not have that small percentage of doubt and worry.
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Posted 8/29/16
genital warts.

Nar even just things like having to talk or see that person every day or live together and have to give up friends and hobbies alot , even sleeping in the same bed everynight.
That's all cool if you're madly in love and on cloud 9.
But also the financial side of things, the sacrifice and effort. Never liked the thought of pooping and farting around each other once you become that comfortable either.
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33 / M / outer wall, level...
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Posted 8/29/16
that she will get fat.
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It doesn't matter.
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Posted 8/29/16
I think the silent killer is a lack of communication.
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18 / M / Reality
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Posted 8/29/16
As long as she hates Imperials, we good.
Werina 
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Posted 8/29/16 , edited 8/29/16
easily replaced. i suppose
Posted 8/29/16
cheater or creep
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Posted 8/29/16 , edited 9/10/16
Taking the first step
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22 / M / Norway
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Posted 8/29/16
Falling in love
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Posted 8/29/16

nemoskull wrote:

that she will get fat.




I shouldn't laugh because i've let myself go but it still made me lol
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Posted 8/29/16 , edited 8/29/16

Ryulightorb wrote:


TheOmegaForce70941 wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


TheOmegaForce70941 wrote:

Hurting hur or something, idk lol


quietglasses wrote:

Being cheated on.


To fear being cheated on just means there's no real trust in the relationship from your side lol


Not true rather ignorant way to view things tbh


No it really isn't, basic psychology have proven multiple times that a relationship where one or both doesn't fully trust each other usually leads to either break up or being replaced. Having trust for someone is the most important thing in a relationship, sure psychology tests have been made on focus groups, however that doesn't mean it doesn't apply to most relationships



so *you're saying as a person who will never trust anyone not even himself 100% a relationship is pointless or there is no real trust and it won't work?

hah don't make me laugh.

Trust is important but it's naive to not have that small percentage of doubt and worry.


You really failed to see my point, didn't you?

Trust issues is a beats in it's own and someone with them can find happiness just like anyone else, however someone with trust issues got it much harder to find anyone and making it last and that's just a fact, just like lack on confidence can also lead you into having a hard time to remain thoghter
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Posted 8/29/16
I kind of had one of my worst fears happen the end of July. I was working retail and a new girl was hired to work with me--I knew her grandfather, but had never met her, and thought it would be easier for her to fit because I knew her someone in her family. She worked hard (outworked me sometimes), and had some great ideas to help the business--really outstanding girl and very much appreciated, she was part of the work family from the first day.

She started flirting around with me after a few days, and I was slow to catch on to it, although everyone else picked it up from the start (which caused a lot of drama later). I started warming up to her after a bit, each day finding myself looking forward to working with her and just be around her. She opened up to me about her life and the bad stuff she was going through (her boyfriend being controlling and abusive and they had broken up recently, her family controlling and emotionally abusive, her scars--both physical and mental--and how she was trying to deal with it all) and I felt real close to her, and my heart ached for her deeper and deeper the more we talked. But it wasn't all talking about the hurt, it was mostly spending time joking and laughing and getting work done with a huge smile and sarcastic humor.

I loved being around her. I don't know exactly when I fell for her, but it was around the time when I took her out to the beach on our day off. We took some nature still shots of the wildlife preserve and hung out on the beach for the rest of the day, swimming and laughing... That next week rolls around and things start falling apart. My co-workers (family members and friends) noticed how close we had grown and started drama. One guy's girlfriend (much older guy and woman, in their 60's) had a particular dislike of the girl from the beginning, staring at her whenever her boyfriend was working with her and they weren't looking with probably the most sinister stare I've ever seen.

The guy started treating her badly after his girlfriend started giving him hell about her working there (jealousy) and he kept getting meaner and meaner to her, and I tried to keep her away from them, but since it's a small business that was impossible. So I scheduled her to not work when they were working, and thought that would settle things. But they weren't the only ones starting drama. Several other business associates (independent contractors and vendors with no affiliation to the business except for selling items wholesale to the business) would make horrible comments about her in front of me and her. One was a female my own age who had flirted with me recently before the girl started working there, and her employer (an older guy who had a serious complex for her) and another guy about my own age who hung out at the store.

The girl I was dating is younger than I am, and it seems to be a huge social taboo to date more than five years younger or older than yourself. Some of the comments were vicious, although cloaked in sarcasm. However, it got to the point where the older guy was so mean to her that he told her that she wasn't allowed in the "back area", and made a scene out of it. She had been talking in the back area to her grandfather who had stopped by (like he did several times a week) and the older guy had told her to get out of the back area and go wait up front. I wasn't around to hear it, but when I did, I lost my shit. I waited for everyone to clock out and it was just me and him alone and I went off on him for nearly an hour. He's a narcissist, and he was jealous because he wasn't the one getting the girl's attention, and frustrated because his own girlfriend was giving him hell about the girl working there.

That night I didn't talk long with her and told her I needed some time away from everyone and everything to relax and vent. I felt her begin to pull away after that. She backed out on our next date, and started texting more and more at work and not spending as much time talking and joking with me. This went on for a couple of weeks, and I eventually found out that it was her ex that she was texting (she knew I didn't like the guy, but she never lied to me about it). She had told me that she was still friends with her ex and that she was trying to be supportive of him. He drove his truck into a tree the night that she and I had spent the day at the beach, and told the EMTs that he did it because she wouldn't answer his calls. I tried to tell her that this guy was abusive and controlling and would never let her live a normal life as long as she continued to have contact with him, but she wouldn't hear it. She couldn't emotionally break free from him. I couldn't continue a relationship with someone who can't let go of her past so that she's free to move on to her future, so I pulled away from her because I felt betrayed, hurt, and angry. We slowly fell apart and haven't talked to each other since.

I think betrayal is the worst thing you can feel in a relationship, in any shape or form.
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