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Do you believe people change?
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Posted 9/12/16 , edited 9/12/16

cdarklock wrote:


Xxanthar wrote:

Do we hibernate or build a cocoon when this occurs?


No, we usually just develop some sort of terrible taste in music. Like when you're 13 you get into emo or something, and then in your mid-twenties you start listening to some awful pop bullshit, and then in your late thirties you start trying to tell people about jazz fusion. By the time you hit your fifties you're convinced the only good music was the music you grew up with and everything they're making now is just noise.



lol... true. I still love Metal, the newer metal not so much.
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Posted 9/12/16
I think so, I've seen drug addicts come to be great people, change is possible but a lot of times you just need help to do it
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Posted 9/12/16

Xxanthar wrote:

lol... true. I still love Metal, the newer metal not so much.


I'm old and crotchety, so while I do listen to some of the newer metal bands, I still piss and moan about how nobody sings like Dio and you just don't get that Tipton-Downing style call and response with modern guitar solos. Plus Tommy Shaw and Ritchie Blackmore are like criminally underrated, and most people don't even know who Buck Dharma is.

So... yeah. The people I listened to when I was twelve, basically. Pretty typical old geezer bullshit.

Posted 9/12/16
I say yes just to piss of my ex who was a firm believer of the opposite.
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Posted 9/12/16
People change, generally at least once a day, though many do it sometimes more often.
Posted 9/12/16

gornotck wrote:

People change, generally at least once a day, though many do it sometimes more often.


What do you mean by that if you don't mind em asking?
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Posted 9/12/16

animecourtney999 wrote:


gornotck wrote:

People change, generally at least once a day, though many do it sometimes more often.


What do you mean by that if you don't mind em asking?


Specifically I was referring to changing clothes, but it holds up for personal changes in personality and behavior as well. Today you are not who you were yesterday. There are a number of people who, for one reason or another, attempt to re-invent themselves constantly. They, in my view, try to change themselves multiple times a day and are both inconsistent and tiring.
Posted 9/12/16

gornotck wrote:


animecourtney999 wrote:


gornotck wrote:

People change, generally at least once a day, though many do it sometimes more often.


What do you mean by that if you don't mind em asking?


Specifically I was referring to changing clothes, but it holds up for personal changes in personality and behavior as well. Today you are not who you were yesterday. There are a number of people who, for one reason or another, attempt to re-invent themselves constantly. They, in my view, try to change themselves multiple times a day and are both inconsistent and tiring.


Ah OK that makes 100% sense in all honesty.
Posted 9/12/16
Yes. I was a lot less patient when I was younger. However, being older made me more sensitive to being offended, I'm not sure why.

Now I understand why some old people are so cranky when you don't do things their way, I'm slowly turning into one of them, I wish I could control myself.
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Posted 9/12/16 , edited 9/13/16

TrickedMJ wrote:


I disagree, I've seen some pretty big changes, I've gone through some myself tbh. I believe if we do go through some huge changes we'll still have the urge to go back to how we were, but we don't have to. A lot of people do and will lie/pretend to be someone else though, but you can usually see through those people.


The brother of my late adoptive father is a sculptor , he prefers working with Jade. And I once asked how he knows what to turn your average block of nondescript block of material into when I was a kid. After all to my eyes a 7 by 7 block of of Jade looks the same as any other 7 by 7 block of Jade. He said that the piece was in the core of the block that all you had to do was remove the dust off it as it were.

People I believe are the same , some of us are simply larger blocks and thus more of us has to be removed before what we are comes to the surface. That isn't change, that is simply refinement. Removing the excess off a block of Jade does not change the piece locked within.
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Posted 9/12/16 , edited 9/12/16

Hail_King_Kakao wrote:

People only seem to change because they change how they act, the inside stays pretty much the same.


I'd agree with this. They way we act and respond to things can change, but our individual weirdness doesn't. And honestly, I like being me, but I dont like how I respond to illogical ideals and things that irritate me (sjws, the regressive left and alt right (offensive speech and economic change will always happen people; deal with it)). I could be more patient and understanding though. (I'm getting irritated thinking about this...)
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Posted 9/12/16
Some times an extreme emotional trauma can cause your personality to change drastically. People cannot be forced or talked into to change by someone else, they have to take the initiative themselves.
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Posted 9/13/16
Some people do change, but they have to figure out that there's something that isn't good about them and want to change it themselves, no-one else can change another person.

I have a great example of someone completely changing too. I used to have a friend years ago that was basically my best friend, he lived a ways away from me and we'd talk all the time. One day I got into a new relationship (I had been in another one for a while prior to breaking up with that guy and then being single for a bit and then dating someone else), and not long after that the best friend started whining and he didn't understand why I wouldn't date him and that whole mess of shit. Telling me I was a horrible person and all this. For a few months he would badmouth me and feel sorry for himself when he never even so much as expressed interest before to begin with. I ended up blocking him and he stalked me online for over a year after that, and then popped up here and there telling me his life was better without me and he learned that people are shitty and whatever other crap.

A couple years ago he got back in contact with me when I started dating a mutual friend, and completely apologized. His entire personality changed, he realized what sort of person he was back then and completely changed his life outlook. Next week he's marrying someone. I honestly never thought anyone could seriously change before this all happened, especially to the extent of how he acted before compared to how he is now. But it does and it can. But like I said the person has to WANT to change and they have to do it for themselves and by themselves. No-one else can for them.
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Posted 9/13/16

animecourtney999 wrote:

Then yep I can agree with that in all honesty just thinking about it well does nothing need to put in the work yourself. Hmmm I somewhat disagree with the last part in all honesty. Personal experience with that one in all honesty. My best friend wanted me to be more like her in all honesty and it was getting to the point I was basically like her in all honesty but she ended the friendship in all honesty because of the fact I was to much like her in all honesty.


Are you still very similar to her? When another person influences your environment by changing what kind of activities you do for example or by the use of persuation or deception makes you, youself realize it's the kind of change you want to work towards then it's possible. People don't have the power to change others just by telling them what to do without making them believe in it first and you can never truly expect someone to change just because you want them to. I guess that was the point of that last sentence. I guess becoming more like her was for some reason also something you wanted to do, even just to make her happy or whatever.
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Posted 9/13/16 , edited 9/13/16
Some people do . . . most never do....

Personally I was a bit of a liberal when I was a kid, I always questioned authority.
It didn't really work for me back then.

I tried being a conservative for a while. I listened to Rush Limbaugh and Mike Reagan et all, etc. I even bought into the idea of "compassionate conservatism."
I got tired of lying to myself about all that stuff... It was just bigotry masquerading as something more politically correct. When ever those people would open up; either they felt they could trust you with their little secret or they were drunk enough, they would say, "They're not prejudice at all they hate ALL the fags, dikes, trannies, spicks, kikes and niggers...."
I always felt I needed to wash myself off after smiling and nodding to placate those kind of despicable people AND those were Most of the conservative people I knew.

I tent to lean to the left again. I was actually on the correct path when I was a kid. Question authority, don't let people tell you what to think.

A lot of the thinking I had during my conservative years was basically jumping on the bandwagon and bitching about people. A lot of it was just aping my relatives bullshit. As I got older I realized most of my relatives are assholes. They are constantly pissed when the world doesn't fit their myopic little view of it and it's always someone else's fault or problem. It's kind of interesting when I look at those people from 1250 miles away and I'm glad they are 1250 miles away. They are doing the same things that they did 30, 40, even 50 years ago.... Acting like a bunch of whiny little kids.

Seems I might not have changed much either.... in the long run . . .
I might not be the right person to ask about this?
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