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Post Reply Girl trouble...
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Posted 9/21/16
I know this may be an odd place to ask something of this caliber, but I feel like I would get some good advice here with the many intelligent people on this forum .

I am now a freshman in college, and during the past beginning days, this girl caught my eye, I walked past her room one time (by accident, didn't know it was her room at first, we live in the same dorm, same floor by the way), and decided to introduce myself to her. It was going smoothly, time to time, I would visit to say wassup, and have general conversation. I somehow managed to get her number, for breakfast that next day, and we had breakfast but her friend tagged along (I had wanted to make my move then but she wasn't alone). After a good few days of nice conversation, I had texted her if she wanted to go out that night, and she never responded. I assume that I creeped her out in such a way that she now tends to walk faster in the hallway to her destination to avoid crossing paths with me ever since, but the real kicker is that I never confronted her about this. After that text, I never back to her room to say hello because she would have thought I was super creepy (she already does...) and was probably going to call the police on me (maybe an exaggeration, but I have crappy self-esteem, who knows, she could've).

I feel absolutely horrible about this. It has nothing to do with pride or anything, nor reputation, it has to do with the fact that I messed something that was going smoothly, up. My friend had told me that I have nothing to feel sorry for because that's the decision she chose, to not speak to me, but I feel guilty of not going up to her again. I really, really don't want another person that I have to avoid seeing in the hallway, and I really want to set things right. I was planning on speaking to her friend about it (I know full well she'll tell her, though, but it didn't matter).

I apologize for the wall of text, but what am I supposed to do here? I am so scared that something bad might happen if I try to go see her, but maybe I need to man up and do it, or just give up completely. Ugh...I mess things up all the time. This was a total misunderstanding but I want her to understand that.

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Posted 9/21/16 , edited 9/21/16
I think you're overexaggerating. Just confront & explain to her what's up.
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24 / F / United States, DE
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Posted 9/21/16
I'm really sorry that you're going through this. :(

Sadly a lot of girls do this, rather than just coming out and saying they're not interested, or whatever the case may be. It's better (on both sides) to just be upfront about things.

I don't think you did anything wrong here, and it's a shame she is brushing you off like that. If you get a chance, gently confront her about it. If not, oh well, she's not worth your time and effort imo.
Posted 9/21/16
I would confront her and talk about it. I'm the type of person that would rather know the answer than to never find out. Imo talk to her about it, it doesn't hurt to ask. If you never ask her you'll have this question in the back of your mind for months
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Posted 9/21/16
Thanks, everyone, for your replies, means so much. How do you think I should go about confronting her about this? Do I simply go over to her room or hope that I may see her in the hallway?
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Posted 9/21/16 , edited 9/21/16
If confrontation is a problem you can always write a letter explaining the situation to save face. Just keep it short, be sincere, and apologize for bothering her if you decide to. Who knows maybe it's a misunderstanding and she's just a little awkward herself in which she might try to clear things up. If she doesn't get back to you, just go about your everyday business and let go of it.

It happens to the best of us, you just can't beat yourself up over it.
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33 / Somewhere...
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Posted 9/21/16
This happens from time to time, and it's not worth being hard on yourself. If you see her in the hall, say hi, but I wouldn't worry anymore about it. It sucks, and definitely doesn't feel good, but there will be others.

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24 / F / Charleston, South...
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Posted 9/21/16 , edited 9/23/16
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24 / F / Charleston, South...
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Posted 9/21/16
But seriously, you should confront her and if that is really what you want. Maybe hold back if you feel like you're being creepy or something. Either way I don't think she will like you as more than a friend, but at least you will know what happened!
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24 / F / Charleston, South...
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Posted 9/21/16

mochi- wrote:

I think you're overexaggerating. Just confront & explain to her what's up.


^^^^but really, this. (:
827
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17 / F / Sutton, MA // Cas...
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Posted 9/21/16 , edited 9/21/16
yeah i understand your problem 100%.....so i think she believes you came on a little to strong, maybe she caught on that u liked her like that and she thinks that going to breakfast and getting her number so soon was rushing and she might have felt like you were invading her privacy or you were too demanding or maybe that she just thought of you as just another guy trying to get in a girls pants. personally i cant be 100% sure of which one because i am not her. i would definitely say that either confronting her about it, leaving her something to read, or talking to her friends are all good options if you really want have an answer or try to continue or start to be friends (whichever she saw in her mind). some people can take things the wrong way or read someone wrong and that's normal and she might have just been on edge because of something else going on in her life. but people can be very understanding and maybe even relate to situations. so i would just take a while and think of a nice letter to write her, or to practice and read to her. and then maybe post it on here and id love to help. iv dealt with a lot of relationship things in my time sadly, so i know how to get around a lot of things and read people well.
sorry if this didn't help as much as u would like. not everything's insta fixable friend. stay strong
*hugs x100*
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Posted 9/21/16
Thank you guys again. 827, your post really got to me, you gave me a different perspective on what might've been going on in her life and that I came on too strong. For some reason, I am so hesitant on going up to her room because she might like, freak out or something. I somehow need to muster up the courage to go in, and somehow pull off a Rasengan when she's not looking. But really, thanks, everyone. if there's anything else that I should know, that'd be great.
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Posted 9/21/16 , edited 9/21/16

DarkBlade000 wrote:

Thank you guys again. 827, your post really got to me, you gave me a different perspective on what might've been going on in her life and that I came on too strong. For some reason, I am so hesitant on going up to her room because she might like, freak out or something. I somehow need to muster up the courage to go in, and somehow pull off a Rasengan when she's not looking. But really, thanks, everyone. if there's anything else that I should know, that'd be great. :)


You might want to use the Reverse Harem No Jutsu and not an attack that'll damage her on a cellular level.

Posted 9/22/16
OP, did you consider she may be thinking the same thing?
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19 / M
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Posted 9/22/16
I haven't thought of that because it seems so impossible. Why, how would that be a possibility if I may ask?
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