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Post Reply How do you deal with trust issues?
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20 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 11/3/16 , edited 11/3/16
So i'm curious how others deal with it ...in my life i have been cheated on over 6 times and used.

This year i have had close friends Betray me and honestly i'm at the point where i find it hard to trust friends.

I'm already at the point where when i date someone i always worry that they will cheat or break my trust because as much as i trust someone i love i can't do so 100% at most 90-99%

Just want to see if others have had trust issues and what helps.
VeggyZ 
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Posted 11/3/16 , edited 11/3/16
Well, personally I can't help but be skeptical of almost everything people say. With normal acquaintances, I tend to assume they're always playing an angle and always trying to get something from me so I feel like they aren't being sincere most of the time. That'll never change, because I've met too many people already.

In the case of someone I'm dating, it's definitely stronger because they're someone you want to trust. Those though, are different than normal relations and you have to put them out of your mind intentionally, even if deep down you're thinking it. That's because if you're looking for things to verify that constantly you'll probably find them. It's more like a self fulfilling prophecy, you create the environment for that betrayal. If you're insecure about trusting them, people definitely pick up on that and it makes things tense and uneasy. I'm not saying don't keep your eyes open for the signs - but you don't really need to go to any lengths to do so until you start noticing specifics.

Once you find proof though, call that shit off right then and there... at least that's how I feel. If you're asking how to dismiss those thoughts ... you're asking a good question because that's the tough part. I guess I'm not so good at that, it seems like the more I try not to think about it the more I dwell on it. With normal acquaintances it's fairly easy because I don't really care about them, but with someone I actually like...

One thing I like to make clear is my stance on cheating, through comments or alluding to it happening before... just depends on the conversation at the time, I suppose. I definitely want it to be clear to them that I'm not okay with two-timing...
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Posted 11/3/16
OP, you have to be self sufficient enough to be able to handle it if it happens.
Then you can trust someone and know you'll be ok no matter what.
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Posted 11/3/16 , edited 11/4/16
You're 19. You have a load of experiences yet to come that will shape who you are and how you react to certain situations.

One thing I can tell you is that some people are shit, some people are great, and some of the great ones can still do shitty things. Don't waste your energy on the first mentioned, and learn to trust in yourself.
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Posted 11/3/16
I don't get attached to anyone I'm unwilling to get hurt by. Duh.



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Posted 11/3/16 , edited 11/4/16

PrinceJudar wrote:

I don't get attached to anyone I'm unwilling to get hurt by. Duh.





So you don't get attached to anyone .....XD?

That's very lonely and no way to live....atleast for me

I don't think anyone is willing to get hurt by anyone.
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Posted 11/3/16 , edited 11/4/16

Ryulightorb wrote:

So you don't get attached to anyone .....XD?

That's very lonely and no way to live....atleast for me

I don't think anyone is willing to get hurt by anyone.

There's no other way for a blind person to navigate--outside of dealing with the paranoia of it happening--is to simply accept the inevitable and to enjoy the time before the fall.

I'm attached to SO, obviously. That's a risk I'm willing to take. I am also attached to my one friend, Chickaroo.

It is all or nothing with me. Attachment is never painless. Trust issues boil down to one not willing to risk it on people--or reluctant to do so.




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Posted 11/3/16
Everybody is different, so you're either going to have to deal with the person as a completely different individual, or spend the rest of your life aching in misery over your trust issues.

Emotional pain is inevitable, if you don't experience it in your life you'll never know your own emotional strength. You'll end up running away from opportunities that might've changed your life for the better.

You never know.
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Posted 11/3/16

Ryulightorb wrote:

So i'm curious how others deal with it ...in my life i have been cheated on over 6 times and used.

This year i have had close friends Betray me and honestly i'm at the point where i find it hard to trust friends.

I'm already at the point where when i date someone i always worry that they will cheat or break my trust because as much as i trust someone i love i can't do so 100% at most 90-99%

Just want to see if others have had trust issues and what helps.



You're still 19, you'll experience and mature more with your journey in life.

You have to learn to love yourself and know if by any chance you get hurt, you won't self-destruct. You'll live on and move on with your life.


Pain is inevitable.
So is falling in love.
You can't be truly honest with yourself and your significant other if you can't trust yourself to be with her.

I'm not saying you should give it ALL.
Always leave a little bit for yourself.
So when things go south and not how you expect things to develop,
You'll get over it. You'll survive the pain.


As time passes, you'll pretty much learn from all these experience and become a better person.
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Posted 11/3/16
Trust no one obviously.
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22 / M / Louisiana
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Posted 11/3/16
Just trust your right hand. He will never let you done
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Posted 11/3/16 , edited 11/3/16
1.) Observe people's behaviours.

2.) Judge their reactions to certain things.

3.) Make decisions on whether to trust them or not.


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Posted 11/3/16

IllIllIIlIllIlIllIlIlIlI wrote:

Just trust your right hand. He will never let you done


I'm laughing, what does it have to do with trust issues?
Please enlighten me.
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22 / M / Louisiana
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Posted 11/3/16

sexyblack_anime wrote:


IllIllIIlIllIlIllIlIlIlI wrote:

Just trust your right hand. He will never let you done


I'm laughing, what does it have to do with trust issues?
Please enlighten me.


His trust issues stim from girls. So he can be like me and take the journey to become a wizard. He just had the use the power of his right hand and trust issues. And he can leave all of the girls alone and not have trust issues
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Posted 11/3/16

IllIllIIlIllIlIllIlIlIlI wrote:


sexyblack_anime wrote:


IllIllIIlIllIlIllIlIlIlI wrote:

Just trust your right hand. He will never let you done


I'm laughing, what does it have to do with trust issues?
Please enlighten me.


His trust issues stim from girls. So he can be like me and take the journey to become a wizard. He just had the use the power of his right hand and trust issues. And he can leave all of the girls alone and not have trust issues


HAHAHAHA, so that's how it is.
Can I be a wizard as well?
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