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Post Reply Do you dislike yourself?
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22 / F / Dominican Republic
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Posted 1/18/17
In a way, yes. But i know Im beautiful and worth it so it doesnt bother me much.
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17 / M / Columbus, OH
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Posted 1/18/17 , edited 1/18/17
No, I wouldn't be a total narcissist If I didn't.
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18 / M / United States
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Posted 1/18/17
Yes, Very much so.
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26 / M / Leanbox, Gameindu...
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Posted 1/18/17 , edited 1/18/17
No, not really.
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(´◔౪◔)✂❤
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Posted 1/18/17
Some people should though
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23 / M
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Posted 1/19/17 , edited 1/19/17
I don't know entirely. I feel like deep down I do. I know that some of stems from the habit of comparing oneself to others or even comparing the current me to how I feel I should be. It's like I want to live life normally but only ever answering to myself. Not in a physical sense, but in the way that I wouldn't let others' opinions or feelings weigh on me. When I'm happy I wish I could laugh and be excited by myself in a crowded area without worrying about people looking or what they are thinking. I dislike myself because I want to be a free man but have no confidence in myself. I have all the reasoning in the world to disprove my fears but that hasn't ever changed my indecision or hesitation. As senseless as I know it is to hold back the honesty in my emotions I'm still paralyzed. It's not like I'm in a deep, deep depression. I have a couple of friends that I can be myself with, but I want to be careless. I feel like I could express myself without restraint but then end up suppressing my own freedom. I overthink and care too much about my actions as well as others. While I can talk to a woman and even be friendly, i would never consider attempting romance or even asking someone out for a cup of coffee. I'll find others with similar interests online or at conventions but have trouble developing a lasting connection. It's only recently that I realize I'm not entirely sure why. I dislike myself because I feel like I could be so much more and the steps I want to take aren't even big ones, but there seems to be this rather large part of me, an entire complex if you will, that has been there for so long conditioning me in a way that keeps me the way I am. And it's worse because I never realized it. It's not malicious or even conscious, just a sum of my insecurities and uncertainties coming together in a pattern that keeps me where I am, remaining powerless. Directionless, stuck in my usual ways. I am absolutely an introvert by nature and it's partially why it's taken me so long to realize. When the safest place in your life is to be alone, isolation is the price you pay (for your RWBY fans). And it's true. Isolation from the world and, worst of all, your feelings I began to realize it hurt more to remember my feelings of aspiration than it did to simply revert to routine. But don't get me wrong, I'm not on the brink and I have plenty to be thankful for. I suppose I'm just tired of avoiding myself by burying my uncertainties instead of facing them. I intend to get the help I know I need, but I saw this topic and thought why not blurt out my feelings at 1am? It's okay to dislike yourself, but know you can change and don't be afraid to ask for help. I still want to do it by myself, I fueled the flame by becoming upset that I couldn't simply will myself to a better existence but in the end I'd still rather ask for help than remain with my own bitter taste for the remainder of my life. It has taken me several years to know this truth, and even now as I feel rushed to move forward I'd like to say to anyone reading: Don't feel you need to improve or succeed right now. It will feel that way, but it's not true. I am wrong and that's not such a bad thing to be.
llunga 
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Posted 1/19/17 , edited 1/19/17

I feel like I could work on my tone sometimes. I grew up around family where having a gentle tone wasn't a thing, if your feelings got hurt then it was because you're sensitive.
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21 / F / North Carolina
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Posted 1/19/17
I dislike myself, but not as much anymore. I mainly hated being shy, not being able to speak up when needed, being considered "weird" by others, etc. But now I accepted those parts a part of me, so my hatred of myself has lessened over the years.
Posted 1/19/17 , edited 1/19/17
At times I do because I feel worthless. I mean I'm 24 and have to accomplish anything notable.
eu7eka 
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Posted 1/19/17 , edited 1/19/17

BeAliveStrive wrote:

I don't know entirely. I feel like deep down I do. I know that some of stems from the habit of comparing oneself to others or even comparing the current me to how I feel I should be. It's like I want to live life normally but only ever answering to myself. Not in a physical sense, but in the way that I wouldn't let others' opinions or feelings weigh on me. When I'm happy I wish I could laugh and be excited by myself in a crowded area without worrying about people looking or what they are thinking. I dislike myself because I want to be a free man but have no confidence in myself. I have all the reasoning in the world to disprove my fears but that hasn't ever changed my indecision or hesitation. As senseless as I know it is to hold back the honesty in my emotions I'm still paralyzed. It's not like I'm in a deep, deep depression. I have a couple of friends that I can be myself with, but I want to be careless. I feel like I could express myself without restraint but then end up suppressing my own freedom. I overthink and care too much about my actions as well as others. While I can talk to a woman and even be friendly, i would never consider attempting romance or even asking someone out for a cup of coffee. I'll find others with similar interests online or at conventions but have trouble developing a lasting connection. It's only recently that I realize I'm not entirely sure why. I dislike myself because I feel like I could be so much more and the steps I want to take aren't even big ones, but there seems to be this rather large part of me, an entire complex if you will, that has been there for so long conditioning me in a way that keeps me the way I am. And it's worse because I never realized it. It's not malicious or even conscious, just a sum of my insecurities and uncertainties coming together in a pattern that keeps me where I am, remaining powerless. Directionless, stuck in my usual ways. I am absolutely an introvert by nature and it's partially why it's taken me so long to realize. When the safest place in your life is to be alone, isolation is the price you pay (for your RWBY fans). And it's true. Isolation from the world and, worst of all, your feelings I began to realize it hurt more to remember my feelings of aspiration than it did to simply revert to routine. But don't get me wrong, I'm not on the brink and I have plenty to be thankful for. I suppose I'm just tired of avoiding myself by burying my uncertainties instead of facing them. I intend to get the help I know I need, but I saw this topic and thought why not blurt out my feelings at 1am? It's okay to dislike yourself, but know you can change and don't be afraid to ask for help. I still want to do it by myself, I fueled the flame by becoming upset that I couldn't simply will myself to a better existence but in the end I'd still rather ask for help than remain with my own bitter taste for the remainder of my life. It has taken me several years to know this truth, and even now as I feel rushed to move forward I'd like to say to anyone reading: Don't feel you need to improve or succeed right now. It will feel that way, but it's not true. I am wrong and that's not such a bad thing to be.


You know what, I think I can sympathize with what you are saying. For me, it's as if I know how to improve myself and what steps to take to become the person I want to be, but I don't take those steps out of fear of what others think of me or how they will feel about me. And when I try to "fake it 'til I make it", I feel it's too much effort to be sociable, or to step out of my shell. But then when I don't, or when I try to but don't succeed in for example a social interaction, I'm reminded of why I don't try in the first place - and that is because I'm reminded of my loneliness. It's an overwhelming loneliness that brings me to tears, feeling like I cannot fit in or get along with others the way I would like. In short, having no friends sucks, and even more is the seeming inability to make friends and lasting connections. I've always just chosen the path of loneliness, being alone. Choose it and accept it halfway, but there is a part of me that thinks that is pathetic. And that's why I don't like myself. I care too much about what others think of me - whether I'm nice or friendly, approachable - and I let that dictate my behavior and keep me silent.
eu7eka 
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Posted 1/19/17

Apholo wrote:

At times I do because I feel worthless. I mean I'm 24 and have to accomplish anything notable.


Hey, me too, high five. What's even worse is when someone, such as your parent, compares you to themselves or others and unnecessarily reminds you something you think every day, that you are behind.
eu7eka 
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Posted 1/19/17

llunga wrote:


I feel like I could work on my tone sometimes. I grew up around family where having a gentle tone wasn't a thing, if your feelings got hurt then it was because you're sensitive.


That's usually what most people think. But honestly, everyone is sensitive. Anything can affect someone in a way you may not have intended, and there's no saying what or why. People take things personally. It's what humans do. Being social creatures isn't necessarily a strength.

But I have a problem with my tone, too. I feel I come off as rude, though that is never my intention.
eu7eka 
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Posted 1/19/17

astralrainexmode wrote:

I dislike myself, but not as much anymore. I mainly hated being shy, not being able to speak up when needed, being considered "weird" by others, etc. But now I accepted those parts a part of me, so my hatred of myself has lessened over the years.


That's really great to hear.
I'm the same way, actually. I tend to wait around for others to do something, to talk first, but that's pointless. Gotta be assertive. But then when I try to talk to other people, they always give me this look like they don't understand or that I'm an alien / weird. And I dislike that. Makes me feel even more singled out than usual. You ever get that?
eu7eka 
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Posted 1/19/17

kevz_210 wrote:

No, not really.


That's great.
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21 / M
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Posted 1/19/17 , edited 1/19/17
I wish I wasn't born. I have absolutely no ambitions or goals, so I have to invent them, in order not to appear myself as garbage. I am talented in sports, but I'm too lazy to do it seriously, besides I'm terribly fickle, if I start to do something that I would not like at a 100%, it is likely that I'll change my mind after 1 or 2 weeks. My life is a big lie and a huge mistake. Kill me because I'm too weak to kill myself. I despise all people, sometimes I'm ashamed to be considered as a human.
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