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Posted 8/6/08
Im trying sth new with his one. Last night, i woke up ay 11:45 singing this, so i decided to write it down. Let me know wat u think of it

Ballad of Love
There was a bright, young man
As kind as anyone could be
A foolish bright, young man
Who lived his life perfectly

But...

One day, he saw a young girl
And she was beautiful
A kind and caring, thoughtful girl
And she was his whole world

He fell in love at first sight
He cared for her with his life
He thought about her every night
And then he gave her quite a fright

When he said...

"I love you, can't you see?
I need you, please be with me
Please hear and answer my plea
I promise to make you so happy"

She said...

"I'm sorry, but I cannot
You are not the man I want
You might hurt and leave me to rot
I don't want these flowers that you bought"

There was a bright, young man
As kind as anyone could be
With so much pain to bear
He decided to end it permanently"


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Posted 8/7/08
Your poetry is very unique and distinguished but hands down my favorite on this page is the poem regret. You captured all the emotion without making it seemed forced. all in all Bravo.
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Posted 8/8/08

X02fighter wrote:

Im trying sth new with his one. Last night, i woke up ay 11:45 singing this, so i decided to write it down. Let me know wat u think of it

Ballad of Love
There was a bright, young man
As kind as anyone could be
A foolish bright, young man
Who lived his life perfectly

But...

One day, he saw a young girl
And she was beautiful
A kind and caring, thoughtful girl
And she was his whole world

He fell in love at first sight
He cared for her with his life
He thought about her every night
And then he gave her quite a fright

When he said...

"I love you, can't you see?
I need you, please be with me
Please hear and answer my plea
I promise to make you so happy"

She said...

"I'm sorry, but I cannot
You are not the man I want
You might hurt and leave me to rot
I don't want these flowers that you bought"

There was a bright, young man
As kind as anyone could be
With so much pain to bear
He decided to end it permanently"




as she said very unique. to be honest iv never read a poem like this before. it was not very long but it was really captivating. i loved it and i give it a 9.0 of 10.0
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Posted 8/8/08
thx so much ^_^
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Posted 8/8/08
to say i love u

my heart bleeding out
and u cant see it
u know im there
but u dont care

we started out as friends
and weird feeling came
was it love
was i ill


everytime u came by me
my heart said let it be
but sum1 else told me to do it
was it right
was it wrong
to love u

so strong
so caring
so gentel
so kind

i wish i could turn back time
n say i love u to to your face
but does it matter now
now that she is in your warm inbrace
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Posted 8/8/08
WAR

i will glady go to war
just so i can see
the body lay before me
i am not strong
and i am not weak
but everytime i kill i seem to weep
where they dads,grandads,brothers 'n' all
noing i kill that person makes
me not live at all.

i will glady go home
just so i can see my families
faces smiling at me.
but when i think of me going home
smiling so happily
i think of the faces not smiling at all.
Because of me.
this is war cant you look for
the people there cant feel sorry...
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Posted 8/8/08

livvie450 wrote:

WAR

i will glady go to war
just so i can see
the body lay before me
i am not strong
and i am not weak
but everytime i kill i seem to weep
where they dads,grandads,brothers 'n' all
noing i kill that person makes
me not live at all.

i will glady go home
just so i can see my families
faces smiling at me.
but when i think of me going home
smiling so happily
i think of the faces not smiling at all.
Because of me.
this is war cant you look for
the people there cant feel sorry...


i can see that u put a lot of emotion into ur writing. is this ur first time writing poetry?
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Posted 8/10/08


livvie450 wrote:

WAR

i will glady go to war
just so i can see
the body lay before me
i am not strong
and i am not weak
but everytime i kill i seem to weep
where they dads,grandads,brothers 'n' all
noing i kill that person makes
me not live at all.

i will glady go home
just so i can see my families
faces smiling at me.
but when i think of me going home
smiling so happily
i think of the faces not smiling at all.
Because of me.
this is war cant you look for
the people there cant feel sorry...”

i can see that u put a lot of emotion into ur writing. is this ur first time writing poetry?


not really i write when im bored or just feel like it
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Posted 8/10/08

livvie450 wrote:



livvie450 wrote:

WAR

i will glady go to war
just so i can see
the body lay before me
i am not strong
and i am not weak
but everytime i kill i seem to weep
where they dads,grandads,brothers 'n' all
noing i kill that person makes
me not live at all.

i will glady go home
just so i can see my families
faces smiling at me.
but when i think of me going home
smiling so happily
i think of the faces not smiling at all.
Because of me.
this is war cant you look for
the people there cant feel sorry...”

i can see that u put a lot of emotion into ur writing. is this ur first time writing poetry?


not really i write when im bored or just feel like it


ohhh okay ^_^ lol. i write whenever i feel like it or if sth major happened in my life and it makes me feel sad or happy and stuff like that
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Posted 8/11/08


The Snake inside of me, the Fallen Angel.

Somewhere in time...
There was a shape shifter
Not for feelings,
--But Attention...
Not for materials
Nothing with sense
Not even reason,
--But Boredom...
Too scared to be alone
At night I was..
Some fallen Angel
At daylight I was..
Just another Snake.
--The Man.
I was lurking both ways
From one victim to another
From soul to soul
Body to body
Just to feel good
And so greedy I was
Painless, for sure.
Without a sparkle, of feeling
With every bite I had
More venin came after
More Lies, lies...
So many lies.
And senseless life
There more I had..
Much more were lost
Every day was boring
Every one was boring
Everything new...
--Taking shapes
More people hurting
More venin gained.
Until the day, that day.
The snake got bitten by...
--Another Snake
With all that venin
Through my veins
Shape shifting, I think
Wasn't working, anymore
Nothing, was the same
Seem the same, nothing
Nothing, felt the same
In fact, I felt...
That was the day, I felt it
Fallen tho, the pain was growing
I was getting smaller and smaller,
Every day, hungry.
Day by day, more hungry
Then ever, in pain.
Hurting, lonely.
I was feeling them
No more souls to haunt,
To hurt, at last.
To feed my snake,
Dying inside, inside of me
The snake was struggling
Between life and death, itself.
Surprisingly with my wings, growing.
Once the snake died, they were...
My wings were growing back, At last.
So beautiful, more beautiful then ever
My lust for love,
Made them grow again...
Even tho my lust for attention
Was getting weaker...
And weaker, so weaker
That I lost my appetite for that
For now, vanished, at least.
And when I grew,
To be mature enough
I saw my wings,
In the mirror one day
Thinking, what a mess
What a mess I left behind
For this, to happen.
What a mess of souls,
A graveyard full, of wings
And a ton of Angels dead
Greedy bastard, the snake
Kept going and going
Painless, living a shameless life
Pity to me, pitying myself
At least, I don't deserve it
I don't deserve anything from others
At least, again
I can look in the mirror
The shame is there,
The quilt is there
And the pain I feel,
It's there too.
It's Me, the SnaKe.
Within an Angel.
Still Me, Shape shifter.
the Fallen Angel...
The Angel face,
With an Evil mind.
It's Me, no other.
No other living,
Could do such things...
Nor death itself,
Could do those things...
It's Me, the Angel
The Angel you don't know.
The Angel you never seen
About you never heard of
Under the skin of that Angel
Was living a snake, pity to me.
That snake still haunts me
From time to time --the present
When time is infinite,
I will endure my pain
Still, he lives thrum my dreams
Haunting, he's still there.
Speechless I was,
For the first time,
In a long time.
Careless I wasn't.
Now trying, to repair...
Trying, not to despair...
That my job, will be in vain
Like that would, not be fair
For all those Sins
My sins, as Angel
My sins, as snake..
So many, many more
The beast inside of me.
I sinned, painless
Now I will endure,
My path full of spins
Because I deserve it, all.
All that will come, bad
Good is still unknown,
I haven't had a feeling
Yet, but still, my fault,
My bad, it's all.
Yet again, somewhere in time
This time, my Angel wings..
My sparkling Angel Wings
So beautiful, but full of pain
I wasn't able to fly yet,
Still, after so many years
I haven't recovered,
Still, my fault.
Doing my job, healing others
Helping others, every day
I was helping myself
Thinking, that one day
Maybe one day, I will become
I will reborn,
As an actual Angel.
But time goes by...
And that day,
This day, it came
The day I met another Angel,
After a long, so long time
After so many years
All these years pitying myself
One day I met an Angel
A real angel, my angel
It was like today,
When I met that Angel
My wings were shivering
At the first glimpse of beauty
Such a beauty, like never seen
Like never seen before,
Oh no, the snake
The snake in me,
That snake, willing to reborn
Willing to kill again
To kill my Angel
I was so hungry,
But hungry for love,
Not just Attention.
I missed that, so much
So much, I missed
A touch, A kiss
And others more...
So there I go,
Pitying myself...
Whether to kill the snake
Whether to let it, live again
Almost giving birth
Rebirth of that evil Beast.
My twin brother,
Within the same body.
In that second I stopped
Shocked, was thinking
Why? why ? why me?
Now that I found...
I found an real Angel
Some Angel, made me feel...
Made me, feel again,
At last, after years...
So many years, in pain, but.
I had to kill, again.
To kill... but,
Not some other Soul
I sinned, again, but..
I saved an Angel, killing a beast.
Killing my own and self soul.
The beast, that beast inside.
To be free, again.
To feel, again.
But time gone by...
My Angel, that beautiful Angel.
My Angel had to fly,
And wasn't coming by...
That Angel, such beauty
That Angel, left me hanging
More like dying... indeed.
But, I felt again.
I felt, love and Pain...
At the same time.
This time, at least.
I know, I think
I know, I didn't hurt no one.
No one but... me.
Thinking, I saved a Soul.
Another Soul to be on my list.
On my list, in that graveyard.
Still feeling, now...
Feeling a bunch
Nor good, nor happy
Nor joy, in my life.
Still, feeling lonely.
But Feeling, something
That something,
That makes me go forward
At last. ---Present.
After going backwards
So many years
So much time,
Time gone by, lost.
So not being me,
So not a beast.
Here I am, finally.
Finally, True...
Loving a shadow
Your Shadow...
An Angel's shadow
In peace with myself.
Able to look in a mirror
And liking what I see.
Here I am, At last,
Some Angel.
At least... for now.
Still loving you,
Loving you, my shadow.
The shadow of an Angel.
Hoping you will fly by again...
So help me God.

---
The story of an Angel face with an Evil mind.
Whom is still sorry for hurting You, and you...
And many others, just like you, My Angel.
Farewell, My beautiful Angel.

//Original can be found here:
http://ClaudelGFX.BlogSpot.com
Enjoy
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Posted 8/11/08


livvie450 wrote:



livvie450 wrote:

WAR

i will glady go to war
just so i can see
the body lay before me
i am not strong
and i am not weak
but everytime i kill i seem to weep
where they dads,grandads,brothers 'n' all
noing i kill that person makes
me not live at all.

i will glady go home
just so i can see my families
faces smiling at me.
but when i think of me going home
smiling so happily
i think of the faces not smiling at all.
Because of me.
this is war cant you look for
the people there cant feel sorry...”

i can see that u put a lot of emotion into ur writing. is this ur first time writing poetry?”

not really i write when im bored or just feel like it ”

ohhh okay ^_^ lol. i write whenever i feel like it or if sth major happened in my life and it makes me feel sad or happy and stuff like that

lol same here or when im bored
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27 / F / Turkey
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Posted 8/14/08
for someone I loved so much and been hurt deeply....

You, Me, Us

A fair dream travels my mind,
as a reminder of you,
a reminder of me,
of us...
....
But it fades away slowly,
doesnt matter how much I hold on to it,
cause it's a dream,
it always have been a dream,
like you...
like me...
like us...
....
Digesting things were told,
never been more harder,
words never reached this deep in me,
never caused more damage,
never felt more broken,
missing you...
missing me...
missing us...
....
You promised we were gonna fly together,
but near the abyss, you pushed me,
i fell and you turned around...you walked away,
you forgot something my dear...
you never thought me how to fly
now falling like you...
falling like me...
falling like us...
....
The ground gets closer
tears fall and my hands over my heart
guarding it,
protecting it,
saving it,
from you...
from me...
from us...
....
The dream disappers forever,
reality becomes the truth,
acceptance fill my heart
and...
i realise i can fly,
fly away from you...
away from me...
from us...
....
I see you below walking slowly,
i see sunrise greeting me,
i realise the truth then...
i am the one with the wings,..
flying over you to the sunrise
....
starting over,
like you...
like me...
....
but..
....
not like us...
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27 / F / Turkey
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Posted 8/14/08
If you like this one it will be a strong encouragement for me to post more... be honest pls...
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Posted 8/14/08

elanra_moonlight wrote:

for someone I loved so much and been hurt deeply....

You, Me, Us

A fair dream travels my mind,
as a reminder of you,
a reminder of me,
of us...
....
But it fades away slowly,
doesnt matter how much I hold on to it,
cause it's a dream,
it always have been a dream,
like you...
like me...
like us...
....
Digesting things were told,
never been more harder,
words never reached this deep in me,
never caused more damage,
never felt more broken,
missing you...
missing me...
missing us...
....
You promised we were gonna fly together,
but near the abyss, you pushed me,
i fell and you turned around...you walked away,
you forgot something my dear...
you never thought me how to fly
now falling like you...
falling like me...
falling like us...
....
The ground gets closer
tears fall and my hands over my heart
guarding it,
protecting it,
saving it,
from you...
from me...
from us...
....
The dream disappers forever,
reality becomes the truth,
acceptance fill my heart
and...
i realise i can fly,
fly away from you...
away from me...
from us...
....
I see you below walking slowly,
i see sunrise greeting me,
i realise the truth then...
i am the one with the wings,..
flying over you to the sunrise
....
starting over,
like you...
like me...
....
but..
....
not like us...


this one really speaks to me. i too have been hurt really badly and each time i see her my heart always shatters into pieces. i would love it if u post more of ur poems
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Posted 8/14/08
Tough Year
The summer has finally ended
And the routine stayed the same
School still starts in August
And everyone still complained

Going back was really easy
But the toughest part of all
Was seeing my ex walking
Towards me down the hall

Over the summer, she changed
I saw it in her eyes
But I still couldn't forgive
All of her stupid lies

This will be a tough year
With her always there
But part of me keeps saying
"Maybe now, she really does care"

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