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Post Reply What are some benefits to being ugly?
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Posted 4/2/17 , edited 4/3/17
If someone agrees to be your partner, you'll know they're doing it for your personality and not your looks. No shallow ppl
And if they've already gotten that far, there's less of a chance they'll be cheating on you when they find the next attractive person
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Posted 4/3/17
hmmmm true love ?
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Posted 4/3/17 , edited 4/3/17
The benefits come indirectly, and usually aren't apparent if you're young.

Once you get older, it becomes evident:

If you're not attractive, that means people have less likely been going out of their way for you. They may even have created roadblocks for you over someone who is more attractive.

That's absolutely huge when it comes to independence. Not handsome/pretty enough for someone to take care of things for you? Well, guess you're going to have to figure it out yourself. Those things you accomplished? Yeah, you can have absolute confidence that was in spite of your disadvantage over your more attractive peers. You may have had to work harder to accomplish something, and you grasp the reality of how difficult that task actually was. You didn't just ''luck'' into it, so you understand the complexity much greater than someone who else.

Overcoming that adversity and having a broader perspective of the world gives you an advantage...assuming you don't let it hold you back and recognize your accomplishments.


It also means you get a ''proper'' picture of the personalities of the people who associate with you. It's very easy for people to have their guard down with someone who is ''less attractive'', and are more likely to act more naturally around them. That's a great advantage over your more attractive peers.

Imagine being overly attractive and trying to find a partner? You better believe they've got people that are approaching them for superficial reasons. They'll be more mislead into that persons intent, and are far more prone to being manipulated. They'll end up dating that facade of a person, until their true personality eventually shines...because it always does.

When you're less attractive, you know that the people that are interested in you, are interested in you for the proper reasons. You can approach relationships in a much more direct manner without all the hassle of figuring these people out.

And finally:

Looks fade. Preferences for partners also wildly differ [especially once you get older]. There will be no ''culture shock'' for you if you've never seen your beauty fade. You will have built real relationships up to that point, and are less likely to have a ''crisis'' when it comes to your declining appearance.

And again, I must restate: Personal preferences really do wildly vary from person to person. When people are younger, they're less likely to acknowledge those personal preferences in favour of what is more socially accepted as ''beautiful''. IE: You can have several people that find you attractive [even if you lack that same self-esteem yourself] but are less willing to act on it. As people get older, they're far less constrained on ''societies definition of beauty'' and are more likely to focus on their own.

For someone like me, that builds confidence in me. Because I know, no matter how terrible my perception of my own beauty is...there's someone I may find some day that is absolutely gorgeous [to me] that is also interested in me over someone else I'd assume is more attractive. It's really odd, but I'm sure everyone experiences this at some point.

Some people may think that they're ugly by contrast to someone who is more obviously beautiful. And it's very easy to dwell on those people's advantages...but what most people don't recognize is a few things:

1. They don't understand the personal struggles that person has. Everyone has something that tends to hold them back...even if it seems trivial to the outside world. Beauty? Wealth? Social acceptance? Every single person is flawed in some respect and has their own challenges they need to overcome...even if they're very different from your own.

2. People often externalize their own problems and struggles on these ''beautiful or successful'' people. They assume that just because a certain aspect of theses beautiful people's lives seems easy in comparison to their own...that they are the source of their unhappiness. That's incredibly false. You play the hand that you're dealt and do the absolute best with it that you can. Your life is exactly that: It's yours. You cannot try and place your life in the context of someone else's.

And why would you want to? There's positives and negatives in everything...just because you decide to focus on the negative doesn't do any good for you. Every single person is far too ignorant to believe their lives would be better in the context of someone else. Life cannot be broken down into individual traits that you admire from another person. Other people will always have something that you admire...[it goes beyond beauty too]...and you will have strengths that other's admire of you...even if you're not aware of it.

In short: Don't compete with anyone but yourself. The world is far too big to try and be the biggest fish in the pond. Admire and respect the advantages other's have on you...but don't think those advantages define them. Acknowledge people as sources as inspiration and not competition.

The more focus on negative emotions you have, the more you're stunting your own growth. Your assumptions and perceptions define your world. If you live instead your head too much instead of the real world, the less likely you are to find happiness.
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Posted 4/3/17
cant relate
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25 / M / claremore oklahoma
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Posted 4/3/17
no drama and real friends
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Posted 4/4/17
No sexual harassment. No unwanted attention. No need to impress other people. Easier to focus on your academic and career goals.
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Posted 4/4/17
nothing.
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27 / M / United States
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Posted 4/5/17

official-shinsengumi wrote:

The one that I can think of right away is that you don't get any messages from weirdos


Lol, that's a good one.
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Posted 4/5/17 , edited 4/5/17
Ugly (most of the times it's being plain, really ugly is rare) and beautiful have the same pros and cons if all you're focused on is looks.
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28 / O / your pantsu
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Posted 4/15/17
potatoes turn into fries !!!
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30 / M
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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17
No one thinks they love you when they don't. Or at least it isn't as big of a problem. Trust me.

I can do both.

Point is, be happy people... now, I want a burger.
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21 / F / FL
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Posted 4/15/17
I don't understand the question.
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106 / M
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Posted 4/15/17
saving money
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F
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Posted 5/5/17
you'll be safe
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24 / F
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Posted 5/5/17
I completely agree with you on this. I feel that people who don't get by on looks are more likely to have a bigger skill set and better empathetic understanding to others. Meaning easier for them to get along with and work in a team setting at a work place. Though the opposite could also be said of these very same people becoming bitter or jealous of what others have. Personally I always find that intelligence and an honest heart are the most important qualities to me in another person. I m not talking insanely smart but there is a difference between ignorance by choice and trying to better ones self. Life is always a learning experience whether you want it or not.
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