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Post Reply Anyone else who doesn't like physical touch in relationships
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27 / M / Canada Ontario
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Posted 4/5/17

Ryulightorb wrote:

Best friends are not what i want because a best friend is friends with someone else i want someone who is there only for me and loves me and i love them and we are only for eachother.

I'm fine with kissing or hugging sometimes personally but i would never be ok with the person i love kissing another person and would hope they feel the same (otherwise i wouldn't date them) i have best friends it's not what i want.

A relationship doesn't entail it needing to be sexual you can have a romantic relationship that is not sexual by all means it's a step up from a best friend and focus's on the feeling of love both people share and show eachother.

Your saying a relationship cannot exist without sexual feelings or sexual intimacy which is actually not true as that's only one form of romantic relationship.

" In the context of romantic love relationships, romance usually implies an expression of one's strong romantic love, or one's deep and strong emotional desires to connect with another person intimately or romantically."


Personally myself i would not want another "Best friend" i have enough close friends i myself am searching for a partner to spend my life with which i feel i will find in the next 10 or so years i have high hopes on that front


I don't misunderstand what a relationship is i know what an intimate relationship is i don't want one of those i want a romantic relationship which is different then being just friends or close friends.


You are now arguing fact with opinion which is impossible.

If I call the tree in my backyard a stick tower to fit my needs it doesnt change the fact the tree is still a tree. You can call it whatever you want have any opinion about it. In the end its still a tree.

Now you just said you want your tree to be a dining room chair. If you want that you need to cut the tree down make it into a lumber then turn it into a chair. Sure you can build your dining room around the tree and sit on a branch but that wont stop the tree from growing and eventually that branch will be to high to sit on and eat at your table.

You cant have your cake and eat it too.

So no matter what YOU want a relationship to be a relationship can only be what a relationship is. A box can hold all sorts of things but no matter what you put in the box its still a box. If you cut out part of the box its no longer a box.
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Posted 4/5/17 , edited 4/5/17

TheAngryLittleAlchemist wrote:

Yeah but touching(not just sexually) is such a big requirement of a relationship, to compromise it for someone else is bound to leave to cheating or just a divorce.



To some not everyone.
Comprormising and touching even if you dislike it won't lead to a divorce or cheating if your partner is satisfied (unless they are a terrible person(only applicable for the cheating)) divorce is fine if they aren't ok with dating someone who is willing to compromise and touch even though they dislike it in the first place...i would ask why they married the person to start with but that's just what my common sense says.
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Posted 4/5/17

MrEnder1337 wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:

Best friends are not what i want because a best friend is friends with someone else i want someone who is there only for me and loves me and i love them and we are only for eachother.

I'm fine with kissing or hugging sometimes personally but i would never be ok with the person i love kissing another person and would hope they feel the same (otherwise i wouldn't date them) i have best friends it's not what i want.

A relationship doesn't entail it needing to be sexual you can have a romantic relationship that is not sexual by all means it's a step up from a best friend and focus's on the feeling of love both people share and show eachother.

Your saying a relationship cannot exist without sexual feelings or sexual intimacy which is actually not true as that's only one form of romantic relationship.

" In the context of romantic love relationships, romance usually implies an expression of one's strong romantic love, or one's deep and strong emotional desires to connect with another person intimately or romantically."


Personally myself i would not want another "Best friend" i have enough close friends i myself am searching for a partner to spend my life with which i feel i will find in the next 10 or so years i have high hopes on that front


I don't misunderstand what a relationship is i know what an intimate relationship is i don't want one of those i want a romantic relationship which is different then being just friends or close friends.


You are now arguing fact with opinion which is impossible.

If I call the tree in my backyard a stick tower to fit my needs it doesnt change the fact the tree is still a tree. You can call it whatever you want have any opinion about it. In the end its still a tree.

Now you just said you want your tree to be a dining room chair. If you want that you need to cut the tree down make it into a lumber then turn it into a chair. Sure you can build your dining room around the tree and sit on a branch but that wont stop the tree from growing and eventually that branch will be to high to sit on and eat at your table.

You cant have your cake and eat it too.

So no matter what YOU want a relationship to be a relationship can only be what a relationship is. A box can hold all sorts of things but no matter what you put in the box its still a box. If you cut out part of the box its no longer a box.




Fact is relationships do not require sex they can be purely without sex.
Kissing and hugging etc is required for most but that is where compromise comes in.

I personally want a romantic relationship without sex given i find someone who feels the same otherwise i will probably just find a normal person to be with and compromise and have sex with them even if it's something im not a fan of if i love them i will do it even if it makes me feel ick
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Posted 4/5/17

Ryulightorb wrote:

To some not everyone.
Comprormising and touching even if you dislike it won't lead to a divorce or cheating if your partner is satisfied (unless they are a terrible person(only applicable for the cheating)) divorce is fine if they aren't ok with dating someone who is willing to compromise and touch even though they dislike it in the first place...i would ask why they married the person to start with but that's just what my common sense says.


Yeah but your question is dumb in the first place. Your question is "Am I the only one who doesn't like touching in relationships". Well in your example you'd have to fine a partner who's okay with no touching in the first place so you're already answering your own question in your hypothetical, because otherwise i'd be literally impossible to be in a relationship.
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Posted 4/5/17 , edited 4/5/17

TheAngryLittleAlchemist wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:

To some not everyone.
Comprormising and touching even if you dislike it won't lead to a divorce or cheating if your partner is satisfied (unless they are a terrible person(only applicable for the cheating)) divorce is fine if they aren't ok with dating someone who is willing to compromise and touch even though they dislike it in the first place...i would ask why they married the person to start with but that's just what my common sense says.


Yeah but your question is dumb in the first place. Your question is "Am I the only one who doesn't like touching in relationships". Well in your example you'd have to fine a partner who's okay with no touching in the first place so you're already answering your own question in your hypothetical, because otherwise i'd be literally impossible to be in a relationship.



No it wouldn't as i said being in a relationship as someone who doesn't like physical touch with someone who does is completely possible and can work as many people i have talked to do it.

Compromise works well i'm not the only one like me i have talked to alot of others most of them tend to be Autistic which makes sense as the issue is mostly a sensory issue.

Also i never asked am i the only one
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Posted 4/5/17

Ryulightorb wrote:


No it wouldn't as i said being in a relationship as someone who doesn't like physical touch with someone who does is completely possible and can work as many people i have talked to do it.

Compromise works well i'm not the only one like me i have talked to alot of others most of them tend to be Autistic which makes sense as the issue is mostly a sensory issue.

Also i never asked am i the only one ;)


OMG you're not listening lol. I never said that it's impossible for someone who likes physical contact and someone who doesn't to be in a relationship, I said that if the partner is willing to compromise that in your hypothetical / they both don't like physical contact, your already answering your own question in your hypothetical.


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Posted 4/5/17

TheAngryLittleAlchemist wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


No it wouldn't as i said being in a relationship as someone who doesn't like physical touch with someone who does is completely possible and can work as many people i have talked to do it.

Compromise works well i'm not the only one like me i have talked to alot of others most of them tend to be Autistic which makes sense as the issue is mostly a sensory issue.

Also i never asked am i the only one ;)


OMG you're not listening lol. I never said that it's impossible for someone who likes physical contact and someone who doesn't to be in a relationship, I said that if the partner is willing to compromise that in your hypothetical / they both don't like physical contact, your already answering your own question in your hypothetical.




To be fair your writing style is fairly incoherent it's hard to understand what you are saying.

Also no im not my question was is anyone else here like that
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Posted 4/5/17

Ryulightorb wrote:

To be fair your writing style is fairly incoherent it's hard to understand what you are saying.

Also no im not my question was is anyone else here like that ;)


No I'm not replying to the thread dude i'm replying to the discussions you had with other users lmao

and yeah i guess it is fairly incoherent but the way we're discussing it's like talking to a wall in circles while on a unicycle
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Posted 4/5/17

TheAngryLittleAlchemist wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:

To be fair your writing style is fairly incoherent it's hard to understand what you are saying.

Also no im not my question was is anyone else here like that ;)


No I'm not replying to the thread dude i'm replying to the discussions you had with other users lmao

and yeah i guess it is fairly incoherent but the way we're discussing it's like talking to a wall in circles while on a unicycle


Oh gotcha didn't realise that my bad but true.
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27 / M / Canada Ontario
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Posted 4/5/17

Ryulightorb wrote:


MrEnder1337 wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:

Best friends are not what i want because a best friend is friends with someone else i want someone who is there only for me and loves me and i love them and we are only for eachother.

I'm fine with kissing or hugging sometimes personally but i would never be ok with the person i love kissing another person and would hope they feel the same (otherwise i wouldn't date them) i have best friends it's not what i want.

A relationship doesn't entail it needing to be sexual you can have a romantic relationship that is not sexual by all means it's a step up from a best friend and focus's on the feeling of love both people share and show eachother.

Your saying a relationship cannot exist without sexual feelings or sexual intimacy which is actually not true as that's only one form of romantic relationship.

" In the context of romantic love relationships, romance usually implies an expression of one's strong romantic love, or one's deep and strong emotional desires to connect with another person intimately or romantically."


Personally myself i would not want another "Best friend" i have enough close friends i myself am searching for a partner to spend my life with which i feel i will find in the next 10 or so years i have high hopes on that front


I don't misunderstand what a relationship is i know what an intimate relationship is i don't want one of those i want a romantic relationship which is different then being just friends or close friends.


You are now arguing fact with opinion which is impossible.

If I call the tree in my backyard a stick tower to fit my needs it doesnt change the fact the tree is still a tree. You can call it whatever you want have any opinion about it. In the end its still a tree.

Now you just said you want your tree to be a dining room chair. If you want that you need to cut the tree down make it into a lumber then turn it into a chair. Sure you can build your dining room around the tree and sit on a branch but that wont stop the tree from growing and eventually that branch will be to high to sit on and eat at your table.

You cant have your cake and eat it too.

So no matter what YOU want a relationship to be a relationship can only be what a relationship is. A box can hold all sorts of things but no matter what you put in the box its still a box. If you cut out part of the box its no longer a box.




Fact is relationships do not require sex they can be purely without sex.
Kissing and hugging etc is required for most but that is where compromise comes in.

I personally want a romantic relationship without sex given i find someone who feels the same otherwise i will probably just find a normal person to be with and compromise and have sex with them even if it's something im not a fan of if i love them i will do it even if it makes me feel ick


You can kiss and hug your friends... I have many friends I hug and a few I kiss. But they are just friends because I dont have sex with them. Kissing CAN be intimate yes but its because its the type of kissing that leads to sex that makes it intimate. You can argue with me and everyone on here about this all you want but your view is disproved even by the dictionairy.

Experts on the topic disagree with you.
Everyone here disagrees.
The dictionairy disagrees.

Bluntly your view is just imature. This is the type of thing a 12 year old virgin girl would say...
So ask yourself what woman would want to be in a relationship with a man who acts like a 12 year old virgin girl?
Of course your relationships wont last. So your choice is 1 keep arguing this try to prove us wrong and never have a relationship or 2 realize you have a PROBLEM and instead of trying to defend it try to fix it.
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Posted 4/5/17 , edited 4/5/17
You can kiss and hug your friends... I have many friends I hug and a few I kiss. But they are just friends because I dont have sex with them. Kissing CAN be intimate yes but its because its the type of kissing that leads to sex that makes it intimate. You can argue with me and everyone on here about this all you want but your view is disproved even by the dictionairy.

Experts on the topic disagree with you.
Everyone here disagrees.
The dictionairy disagrees.

Bluntly your view is just imature. This is the type of thing a 12 year old virgin girl would say...
So ask yourself what woman would want to be in a relationship with a man who acts like a 12 year old virgin girl?
Of course your relationships wont last. So your choice is 1 keep arguing this try to prove us wrong and never have a relationship or 2 realize you have a PROBLEM and instead of trying to defend it try to fix it.



No you are wrong platonic and romantic relationships exist without intimacy expert even agree and the dictionary itself expresses it doesn't need to be intimate.

Your view is also immature your acting as if every form of relationship requires intimacy and that is just wrong.

I don't have a problem disliking touch is not a problem that's a trait and something that is completely fine nothing wrong with it at all.
I have had relationships before and compromise is how i made them work and i will continue to have relationships in the future.

No woman would want to be which is good for me since i don't act like one i dislike touch and sex both are fine things and don't disable someone from having a romantic relationship.

You can disagree all you want but knowing people who are in relationships like the one i want and girls who dislike touch and other guys and people in my same situation who have married and have great relationships where sex and touch is minor important i think i will do just fine buddy


You are being narrow minded to think a relationship is only functional with sex and intimacy or that their is only one form of valid relationship

Sexless relationships exist for a reason and its normal for lets say asexual people to get into romantic relationships without sex or intimacy.

I even pointed out the dictionairy earlier where it said intimacy OR romance.


Also buddy i don't like that you are insisting that my not liking to touch someone which is a valid thing and i have a valid reason (Sensory issues) is a problem as it's not and that is infact quite offensive to tell someone that a trait of theirs is a problem
Posted 4/5/17

Ryulightorb wrote:

well it's not people do things that don't like doing in relationships as compromise that's how they work out in the long term.
it's not a big deal touching people even if you hate it imho is worth it if it makes the other happy.

Everyone i know who has had lasting long relationships has learnt to compromise with what they hate or dislike :).


You seriously need to start listening to what people are saying.
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Posted 4/5/17

TartanButterfly wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:

well it's not people do things that don't like doing in relationships as compromise that's how they work out in the long term.
it's not a big deal touching people even if you hate it imho is worth it if it makes the other happy.

Everyone i know who has had lasting long relationships has learnt to compromise with what they hate or dislike :).


You seriously need to start listening to what people are saying.


I am and they are wrong to think all people are like that.

Not everyone has the same standards or needs in a relationship.

There is nothing wrong with wanting a romantic relationship without much touch and it is completely possible.
What people are saying goes against all logic and suggest not having sex or touch in a relationship makes it not a relationship which is factually false.

Sexless relationships are completely fine and personally i think are the better form of relationship but that's just my opinion.

Why should i touch people when it makes me feel gross?
why should that hold me back from having love?

Answer it shouldn't and won't.

Lets be reasonable and logical people this is 2017 the global intelligence rates are quite well these days.
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Posted 4/5/17 , edited 4/5/17
Allow me to quote word for word the Webster dictionairy based on the context of this conversation.

Relationship: A ROMANTIC or PASSIONATE attchement
Romantic: Conducive to or suitable for LOVEMAKING
Passionate: Swayed by or affected with SEXUAL desire.

Feel free to argue with the foundation of the English language agreed upon by the world. Thus you are WRONG. End of story end of debate any further attempts to try and prove otherwise are simply rendered false.

Posted 4/5/17

Ryulightorb wrote:

I am and they are wrong to think all people are like that.

Not everyone has the same standards or needs in a relationship.

There is nothing wrong with wanting a romantic relationship without much touch and it is completely possible.
What people are saying goes against all logic and suggest not having sex or touch in a relationship makes it not a relationship which is factually false.

Sexless relationships are completely fine and personally i think are the better form of relationship but that's just my opinion.

Why should i touch people when it makes me feel gross?
why should that hold me back from having love?

Answer it shouldn't and won't.

Lets be reasonable and logical people this is 2017 the global intelligence rates are quite well these days.


THEY DON'T ALL THINK PEOPLE ARE LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!

relationship
NOUN

1The way in which two or more people or things are connected, or the state of being connected.
‘the study will assess the relationship between unemployment and political attitudes’

1.1 The state of being connected by blood or marriage.
‘they can trace their relationship to a common ancestor’

1.2 The way in which two or more people or groups regard and behave towards each other.
‘the landlord–tenant relationship’
‘she was proud of her good relationship with the staff"

1.3 An emotional and sexual association between two people.
‘she has a daughter from a previous relationship’

Pay particularly close attention to the part in red.
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