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Post Reply How to make friends who aren't fake?
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 4/15/17
So six "friends" have back stabbed me this month making it hard for me to trust others and i personally don't know how to go about making friends that aren't fake since most people i become friends with betray me for self interest and selfishness most of the time.
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π / Train / Railyard
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Posted 4/15/17
Have you ever thought you might be the problem? Either that or you're super unlucky when it comes to meeting potential friends.
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17

wststreet wrote:

Have you ever thought you might be the problem? Either that or you're super unlucky when it comes to meeting potential friends.


Well i'm not doing anything wrong so i doubt that is the case if it were then i don't know what i would be doing wrong i'm very rational and logical around people and esspecialy friends blunt and concise.

I pay close attention to my friends and give them a lot of attention and care deeply for them and fulfill all the neccesary requirements if not go beyond what most people do just to make sure my friends are happy.

My friends who haven't left me have told me they don't think its me because they don't see how it could be since i'm kind.


All the people who have backstabbed me this month have done so for personal gain...so im lead to believe i was just always there as person and when they saw they could gain from betraying me they took that chance.

I honestly cant personally see any rational reason people would betray their friends since being selfish like that is just.....horrible friends are important nearly if not more important then ones own self so i could never understand what fully drives a person to betray someone.

Most people who have betrayed me alot of my friends have shown signs though (shit talking others and spreading rumours etc things i just sat away from and didn't take a part in because i didn't agree with it) so...i wouldn't put it past that i'm just making bad friends.

I only personally seem to make friends with people who have social and mental disorders so that may be part of the problem.....all in all if it is me i don't know what to change (since i don't want to change who i am i am fine in all respects as a person)

It's very puzzling to me and as someone who already has major trust issues it only deepens them.
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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17

Ryulightorb wrote:


wststreet wrote:

Most people who have betrayed me alot of my friends have shown signs though (shit talking others and spreading rumours etc things i just sat away from and didn't take a part in because i didn't agree with it) so...i wouldn't put it past that i'm just making bad friends.


Doesn't that actually answer your own question? I've learned to stay away from people who gossip. The best friends are those who say things to your face, whether you like what your hear or not, they'll be honest with you.

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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 4/15/17

wststreet wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


wststreet wrote:

Most people who have betrayed me alot of my friends have shown signs though (shit talking others and spreading rumours etc things i just sat away from and didn't take a part in because i didn't agree with it) so...i wouldn't put it past that i'm just making bad friends.


Doesn't that actually answer your own question? I've learned to stay away from people who gossip. The best friends are those who say things to your face, whether you like what your hear or not, they'll be honest with you.



that's a good point i should take that advice and will!
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Posted 4/15/17
by being genuine yourself first ?
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 4/15/17

summerbeat wrote:

by being genuine yourself first ?


i aam a genuine friend to my friends ^^ they are important to me <3
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Posted 4/15/17
Every single relationship of any sort you've had is fake. There is no such thing as a genuine person unless they are lacking mentally.
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 4/15/17

HateKillingCamels wrote:

Every single relationship of any sort you've had is fake. There is no such thing as a genuine person unless they are lacking mentally.


i wouldn't say just because someone isn't 100% genuine doesn't mean every relationship is fake.
I have friends who are real friends i would never consider fake even if they did betray me (thats how close i am to them)
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Posted 4/15/17
Maybe you come off as someone that's easy to use for manipulative people?

Humms 
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Posted 4/15/17
You are the problem .

There I just saved you years of abuse and sorrow. Now fix it.
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17

trmjkd989 wrote:

Maybe you come off as someone that's easy to use for manipulative people?



That is probably it im very trusting of people who show me kindness....
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21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17

Humms wrote:

You are the problem .

There I just saved you years of abuse and sorrow. Now fix it.


How am i the problem?
Just saying that doesn't explain how or why and how to fix it.
would fixing it change who i am as a person if so i would rrather not change it as i'm perfect as a person how i am right now


Just saying someone is the problem isn't informative and comes across as very assuming.
Humms 
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Posted 4/15/17

Ryulightorb wrote:


Humms wrote:

You are the problem .

There I just saved you years of abuse and sorrow. Now fix it.


How am i the problem?
Just saying that doesn't explain how or why and how to fix it.
would fixing it change who i am as a person if so i would rrather not change it as i'm perfect as a person how i am right now


Just saying someone is the problem isn't informative and comes across as very assuming.


Because you complain all the time about friends who just want nothing to do with you in relation to The back stabbing.

Nobody is perfect. I'm not. I'm not perfect the way I am, I need to constantly change myself in order to understand what it means to be a true honest individual.

You can't fix what you won't admit. So do yourself a favor and start working on yourself rather than a fucking friendship.

Now if you'll excuse my, I have some overtime to attend to.......

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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17
People are weird! Its the way of the world. Why do you need friends for? Friends are for the weak. Like my father said friends use each other.

My father alway tell me to use friends, but I couldn't bring myself to do it.. Since I got high sense of Honor.
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