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Post Reply How to make friends who aren't fake?
Cenric 
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Posted 4/15/17
Ryu, there's not enough information here to come up with a proper answer, if you want a proper reply stop using meaningless words like back stab and fake which could mean a million things and actually explain what those friends did to you.
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Posted 4/15/17

Humms wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


Humms wrote:

You are the problem .

There I just saved you years of abuse and sorrow. Now fix it.


How am i the problem?
Just saying that doesn't explain how or why and how to fix it.
would fixing it change who i am as a person if so i would rrather not change it as i'm perfect as a person how i am right now


Just saying someone is the problem isn't informative and comes across as very assuming.


Because you complain all the time about friends who just want nothing to do with you in relation to The back stabbing.

Nobody is perfect. I'm not. I'm not perfect the way I am, I need to constantly change myself in order to understand what it means to be a true honest individual.

You can't fix what you won't admit. So do yourself a favor and start working on yourself rather than a fucking friendship.

Now if you'll excuse my, I have some overtime to attend to.......





Well anyone would complain if someone back stabs you there is every right to complain.
I'm not perfect either but i make it a thing not to betray other peoples trust and lie to them.

I do work on myself all the time but you are putting the blame on me saying i shouldn't complain when people do things that are wrong? that just makes no sense it's illogical honest people don't lie and betray their friends people should complain when they are backstabbed by those who do such.

I admit i complain alot but it is well in good reason if i didn't complain i would be doing myself wrong by just letting those people walk all over me and walk away after doing wrong.

I think you misunderstand you make it seems like when i say betray these people just didn't want to be my friends anymore that is not the case the people in question actively tried to hurt me and spread lies about me among other things.

I admit i have flaws im not perfect i work on them all the time but that doesn't mean i should just shut up and accept other peoples wrong doings does it?
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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17

Cenric wrote:

Ryu, there's not enough information here to come up with a proper answer, if you want a proper reply stop using meaningless words like back stab and fake which could mean a million things and actually explain what those friends did to you.


Well the last 5 friends i had this month were a group one of them made up a lie that i have been harassing them sexually (wtf? i didn't even talk to them in that sense nor would i) and then they convinced their friends my friends this who picked a side in turn they convinced an admin on a discord i loved since they had tons of people spreading this lie.

I thought they were all my friends i was just horrified when they turned around and just turned on me and made up foul lies that were just sickening.

I even showed the admin my chat logs with said person and they said well since there are 5 people claiming i did something i didn't there is nothing they could do)

i'm not sad i lost my favourite place to talk anymore but losing friends or who i thought were friends i talked to daily like that was just painful.


Didn't help that the person who made the lie up (who is mentally ill) promised me they would never betray my trust the week before hand.



I generally end up befriending people like this people who make up lies and things that never happened or just turn around and use me as a stepping stone to push their way up in a social hierarchy.

That's what i mean by fake and backstabbing ....people that befriend you with the aims to use you instead of actually being your friend.

I have real friends who won't backstab me but with people in my life having done such things to me ever since i was a young kid till now i sometimes start to worry if my true friends will one day just decide i can use this guy to benefit myself and throw him away.

I have 0 intuition when it comes to making friends and telling if people have ulterior motives.

(if you think maybe i did something wrong and didn't realise it i did have multiple people read over said chat logs this person was just really weird it wasn't the first time they had lied about something and tried to set me up and get me introuble for something i never did)
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Posted 4/15/17

Ryulightorb wrote:


Cenric wrote:

Ryu, there's not enough information here to come up with a proper answer, if you want a proper reply stop using meaningless words like back stab and fake which could mean a million things and actually explain what those friends did to you.


Well the last 5 friends i had this month were a group one of them made up a lie that i have been harassing them sexually (wtf? i didn't even talk to them in that sense nor would i) and then they convinced their friends my friends this who picked a side in turn they convinced an admin on a discord i loved since they had tons of people spreading this lie.

I thought they were all my friends i was just horrified when they turned around and just turned on me and made up foul lies that were just sickening.

I even showed the admin my chat logs with said person and they said well since there are 5 people claiming i did something i didn't there is nothing they could do)

i'm not sad i lost my favourite place to talk anymore but losing friends or who i thought were friends i talked to daily like that was just painful.


Didn't help that the person who made the lie up (who is mentally ill) promised me they would never betray my trust the week before hand.



I generally end up befriending people like this people who make up lies and things that never happened or just turn around and use me as a stepping stone to push their way up in a social hierarchy.

That's what i mean by fake and backstabbing ....people that befriend you with the aims to use you instead of actually being your friend.

I have real friends who won't backstab me but with people in my life having done such things to me ever since i was a young kid till now i sometimes start to worry if my true friends will one day just decide i can use this guy to benefit myself and throw him away.

I have 0 intuition when it comes to making friends and telling if people have ulterior motives.

(if you think maybe i did something wrong and didn't realise it i did have multiple people read over said chat logs this person was just really weird it wasn't the first time they had lied about something and tried to set me up and get me introuble for something i never did)


They're not worth your time, they remind me of people that spread lies about me. Even wrote website about it rofl, I could've taking them to court and sue their ass.

If they're trying to ruin your reputation take them to court.
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Posted 4/15/17

JanusCascade wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


Cenric wrote:

Ryu, there's not enough information here to come up with a proper answer, if you want a proper reply stop using meaningless words like back stab and fake which could mean a million things and actually explain what those friends did to you.


Well the last 5 friends i had this month were a group one of them made up a lie that i have been harassing them sexually (wtf? i didn't even talk to them in that sense nor would i) and then they convinced their friends my friends this who picked a side in turn they convinced an admin on a discord i loved since they had tons of people spreading this lie.

I thought they were all my friends i was just horrified when they turned around and just turned on me and made up foul lies that were just sickening.

I even showed the admin my chat logs with said person and they said well since there are 5 people claiming i did something i didn't there is nothing they could do)

i'm not sad i lost my favourite place to talk anymore but losing friends or who i thought were friends i talked to daily like that was just painful.


Didn't help that the person who made the lie up (who is mentally ill) promised me they would never betray my trust the week before hand.



I generally end up befriending people like this people who make up lies and things that never happened or just turn around and use me as a stepping stone to push their way up in a social hierarchy.

That's what i mean by fake and backstabbing ....people that befriend you with the aims to use you instead of actually being your friend.

I have real friends who won't backstab me but with people in my life having done such things to me ever since i was a young kid till now i sometimes start to worry if my true friends will one day just decide i can use this guy to benefit myself and throw him away.

I have 0 intuition when it comes to making friends and telling if people have ulterior motives.

(if you think maybe i did something wrong and didn't realise it i did have multiple people read over said chat logs this person was just really weird it wasn't the first time they had lied about something and tried to set me up and get me introuble for something i never did)


They're not worth your time, they remind me of people that spread lies about me. Even wrote website about it rofl, I could've taking them to court and sue their ass.

If they're trying to ruin your reputation take them to court.


yeah you are right i spend to much time on them i should probably just move on i guess now i think about it focusing on it is giving them what they want >.<
Cenric 
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Posted 4/15/17
People who do that have problems and that's not your fault. I think you would agree that trusting too easily is the first problem here. During the time I've spent on this site I've noticed you commit to people very quickly whether it's into a relationship or friendship. Do you even consider what kind of problems this person might have before you're all buddy buddy, best friends with them? Also you seem to value friendship above everything else right? That's why you never accept criticism about the fact that maybe you're a bit too emotionally dependent on other people. If you gained more independence and carefully selected who you should trust I doubt you would end up in these situations so often. Maybe it's a good thing that these events are making it harder for you to trust others as it seems in the past you've been extremely trusting even when it's not warranted. Trust is something that should be gained through action(not words like "I will never betray you") over a very long period of time. When we trust someone it means we act vulnerable around them and that makes us an easy target to those people. Trust is a defense mechanism that protects us(by not allowing anyone who would abuse it in) and yours is too easy to surpass.

And just to criticize you a bit more, tbh you are a bit of a drama queen.
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Posted 4/15/17

Cenric wrote:

People who do that have problems and that's not your fault. I think you would agree that trusting too easily is the first problem here. During the time I've spent on this site I've noticed you commit to people very quickly whether it's into a relationship or friendship. Do you even consider what kind of problems this person might have before you're all buddy buddy, best friends with them? Also you seem to value friendship above everything else right? That's why you never accept criticism about the fact that maybe you're a bit too emotionally dependent on other people. If you gained more independence and carefully selected who you should trust I doubt you would end up in these situations so often. Maybe it's a good thing that these events are making it harder for you to trust others as it seems in the past you've been extremely trusting even when it's not warranted. Trust is something that should be gained through action(not words like "I will never betray you") over a very long period of time. When we trust someone it means we act vulnerable around them and that makes us an easy target to those people. Trust is a defense mechanism that protects us(by not allowing anyone who would abuse it in) and yours is too easy to surpass.

And just to criticize you a bit more, tbh you are a bit of a drama queen.




I try to but i guess i'm a bit naive there.
I am emotionally dependant on other people i know that but i don't like the idea of ones self relying on only themselves i think people should rely on themselves and their friends but i guess i rely on friends a bitch to much i need to gow there.

You may have a point i think i am a bit to trusting my best friend Nala told me i'm too kind,trusting and naive x.x and yeah...i seem to have drama follow me and when i get into an argument i go through with it until it ends personally not sure how to deal with that problem to be honest i'm a very emotional person i react highly on my emotions......but your right it might be good this kind of thing happened it allows me to grow.

thanks for the criticizing by the way im glad to hear peoples opinions and i know im a bit of a drama queen i do try not to be but i need to work on that ALOT
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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17
We get it, everyone else is wrong. You're always right.
jl6
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Posted 4/15/17
I do not know you but based on your profile and i'm quoting this see below V

Why do people betray each other? if you can't trust anyone then everyone should DIE

^ why should everyone die? you are really creepy i would avoid you?
Humms 
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Posted 4/15/17

Ryulightorb wrote:


Humms wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


Humms wrote:

You are the problem .

There I just saved you years of abuse and sorrow. Now fix it.


How am i the problem?
Just saying that doesn't explain how or why and how to fix it.
would fixing it change who i am as a person if so i would rrather not change it as i'm perfect as a person how i am right now


Just saying someone is the problem isn't informative and comes across as very assuming.


Because you complain all the time about friends who just want nothing to do with you in relation to The back stabbing.

Nobody is perfect. I'm not. I'm not perfect the way I am, I need to constantly change myself in order to understand what it means to be a true honest individual.

You can't fix what you won't admit. So do yourself a favor and start working on yourself rather than a fucking friendship.

Now if you'll excuse my, I have some overtime to attend to.......





Well anyone would complain if someone back stabs you there is every right to complain.
I'm not perfect either but i make it a thing not to betray other peoples trust and lie to them.

I do work on myself all the time but you are putting the blame on me saying i shouldn't complain when people do things that are wrong? that just makes no sense it's illogical honest people don't lie and betray their friends people should complain when they are backstabbed by those who do such.

I admit i complain alot but it is well in good reason if i didn't complain i would be doing myself wrong by just letting those people walk all over me and walk away after doing wrong.

I think you misunderstand you make it seems like when i say betray these people just didn't want to be my friends anymore that is not the case the people in question actively tried to hurt me and spread lies about me among other things.

I admit i have flaws im not perfect i work on them all the time but that doesn't mean i should just shut up and accept other peoples wrong doings does it?


You know what? Nothings fucking good enough for you, that's your problem. People don't meet your expectations, so what are you going to do about?.... Oh that's right, you bitch about it constantly. You're like a fucking woman with mood swings.

I'm tired of holding back on people like you.

Other people's wrong doings? Well guess what? If they did you wrong just fucking leave them out of your life. I don't care if I grew up with a friend, if they do me wrong with no signs of finding forgiveness and correction, kick them to the curb and move on. They weren't really your friend if they want to betray you. Trying to play the victim all the time doesn't help either, be the better man and walk away from it. Stop arguing over the stupidest Bullshit.

Oh I know I'm not perfect ( ya because I made you realize that you were full of shit
)

You had reason to complain? Really? Talking about so called friends that probably don't give a shit about you. Yeah, such a real reason to complain.

ya, just get it out there now, I don't need to hide anymore.

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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17

jl6 wrote:

I do not know you but based on your profile and i'm quoting this see below V

Why do people betray each other? if you can't trust anyone then everyone should DIE

^ why should everyone die? you are really creepy i would avoid you?


That's a quote from virtues last reward a game I'm playing nothing to do with this hahahaha

Quoted it as it's the main quote from the opening and it's a very philosophical game I'm in love with
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Posted 4/15/17

Axerilis wrote:

We get it, everyone else is wrong. You're always right.


No one said that and that's wrong I make mistakes a lot and I own up to them
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Posted 4/15/17 , edited 4/15/17

Humms wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


Humms wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


Humms wrote:

You are the problem .

There I just saved you years of abuse and sorrow. Now fix it.


How am i the problem?
Just saying that doesn't explain how or why and how to fix it.
would fixing it change who i am as a person if so i would rrather not change it as i'm perfect as a person how i am right now


Just saying someone is the problem isn't informative and comes across as very assuming.


Because you complain all the time about friends who just want nothing to do with you in relation to The back stabbing.

Nobody is perfect. I'm not. I'm not perfect the way I am, I need to constantly change myself in order to understand what it means to be a true honest individual.

You can't fix what you won't admit. So do yourself a favor and start working on yourself rather than a fucking friendship.

Now if you'll excuse my, I have some overtime to attend to.......





Well anyone would complain if someone back stabs you there is every right to complain.
I'm not perfect either but i make it a thing not to betray other peoples trust and lie to them.

I do work on myself all the time but you are putting the blame on me saying i shouldn't complain when people do things that are wrong? that just makes no sense it's illogical honest people don't lie and betray their friends people should complain when they are backstabbed by those who do such.

I admit i complain alot but it is well in good reason if i didn't complain i would be doing myself wrong by just letting those people walk all over me and walk away after doing wrong.

I think you misunderstand you make it seems like when i say betray these people just didn't want to be my friends anymore that is not the case the people in question actively tried to hurt me and spread lies about me among other things.

I admit i have flaws im not perfect i work on them all the time but that doesn't mean i should just shut up and accept other peoples wrong doings does it?


You know what? Nothings fucking good enough for you, that's your problem. People don't meet your expectations, so what are you going to do about?.... Oh that's right, you bitch about it constantly. You're like a fucking woman with mood swings.

I'm tired of holding back on people like you.

Other people's wrong doings? Well guess what? If they did you wrong just fucking leave them out of your life. I don't care if I grew up with a friend, if they do me wrong with no signs of finding forgiveness and correction, kick them to the curb and move on. They weren't really your friend if they want to betray you. Trying to play the victim all the time doesn't help either, be the better man and walk away from it. Stop arguing over the stupidest Bullshit.

Oh I know I'm not perfect ( ya because I made you realize that you were full of shit
)

You had reason to complain? Really? Talking about so called friends that probably don't give a shit about you. Yeah, such a real reason to complain.

ya, just get it out there now, I don't need to hide anymore.



Ugh I never said nothing's not good enough for me all I want is friends who don't lie not to much to want or ask
I can't move on from someone like that I'm not emotionless I'm going to grieve their loss after they are gone I do try to move on after a lot of grieving

Also no I never said I was perfect you assumed so atleast it seems and friends lying is always a valid reason to complain everyone I know complains when people lie to them how come it's not ok if I do it just like others?

You assume alot about me obviously I must be doing something wrong when people see me wrong for doing the same thing as any other person complaining when hurt.

My only guess is because I do so in a public setting because I was asking for suggestions on how to find people not like that and people dislike seeing people complain whether valid or not but my guess could be wrong
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Posted 4/15/17
It's been a long time since I've had real friends in the real world (right now, my only friend is someone I knew online for 8 years) so I can;t really say but I guess there's no real way of making friends who aren't fake. Either you can tell that they;re fake before hand or not and if you can't, either they become genuine later or or not.

If they betray you in the worst way possible, I guess you'd be hurt and stuff but learn from it and leave them. Keep the good ones and make new friends maybe? I'm not really sure but I hope the best for you.
Humms 
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Posted 4/15/17

Ryulightorb wrote:


Humms wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


Humms wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


Humms wrote:

You are the problem .

There I just saved you years of abuse and sorrow. Now fix it.










.



Ugh I never said nothing's not good enough for me all I want is friends who don't lie not to much to want or ask
I can't move on from someone like that I'm not emotionless I'm going to grieve their loss after they are gone I do try to move on after a lot of grieving

Also no I never said I was perfect you assumed so atleast it seems and friends lying is always a valid reason to complain everyone I know complains when people lie to them how come it's not ok if I do it just like others?

You assume alot about me obviously I must be doing something wrong when people see me wrong for doing the same thing as any other person complaining when hurt.

My only guess is because I do so in a public setting because I was asking for suggestions on how to find people not like that and people dislike seeing people complain whether valid or not but my guess could be wrong


I don't need to Assume fuck all to know that you are a manipulator. I don't even need to look at you in person to know that. I just need to look at someone for 10 seconds to find out if I can talk to them and trust them..... but you.... you're just to easy.

Let's just say that you find more friends...... Then what? What will you do? What do you do? Because I can talk to anyone on the fucking street if I wanted to. OH HI, NICE DAY ISN'T IT? HOW ARE YOU TODAY? People are either going to ignore you for 1. Respond with an empty meaningless response for 2. Or genuinely give you a proper response and open up their space to you for 3.

if you can't realize what kind of person they are from just simply trying to communicate with them daily. What's the point of feeling like you've been wronged? Don't be a sucker. Actually you should stop being a sucker and stop trying to be friendly when in all reality you aren't.

I can read you like a fucking book.

You want a suggestion, but you fucking blow off every so called assumption in someone's response in your reality. Maybe you should stop and think. You are hopeless, because you're to blind to see the real betrayer. Yourself.

I had best friends that I don't even talk to anymore, because I seen them for who they really are, and I don't bitch about it, I accept it, because acceptance leads to change for the better.

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