Post Reply Opinions on my break-up response.
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Posted 4/16/17 , edited 4/16/17
So going through a divorce. Dated another girl in the after we split. The girl I was dating is the one I am asking about.
I wasn'wasn't really ready for something serious, but she came on strong, talked a really mean game, and hooked me good. So, it started out problematic. In a couple months, I had forgiven her for more crap than I have forgiven any woman for. I thought that those moments of happiness were so great, something I wasn't used to, that working through her issues would be worth it.
About a week ago her ex gets a settlement (in reality, not all that large, and will be gone in months )in that he has been waiting on for years. She found out when she went over to pick up her daughter. (They've been split for 6 years and she loathes being around the guy.) So, I guess you all know who she is with, now.
So, I have to fight with her to get my SD card back from her phone. It has pictures of my daughters. When I get it back I realize that most of the pictures she has of me is on it or her Facebook. I have access to her Facebook.
I go in and delete everything that exists of me or us on her Facebook, messages, pics, everything. Then send her a message telling her to change her password, because I don't want it. Force her to block me... asked, but ended up having to say some really mean shit before she would. Deleted any shred of ability to contact her. I told her, "I don't even want the ability to contact you."
Changed my facebook to this: https://m.facebook.com/jacob.hopkins.378
That way, she can't even see pictures of me.
I did everything in my power to make myself a fucking ghost. To stop existing to her. I want to be nothing but a memory. And wish I could be less than that.

So, my question is, how crazy is my response? Opinions?
Humms 
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Posted 4/16/17
.... You deleted everything from Facebook.


OK You Show dat Bitch whos boss !
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Posted 4/16/17 , edited 4/16/17

Humms wrote:

.... You deleted everything from Facebook.


OK You Show dat Bitch whos boss !


No, man. Everything is still on facebook. If you are on my Friends list. You can see all my stuff. Photos and everything.

I deleted everything of our time together off of HER Facebook before telling her to change her password.

Basically, I just made it so that there is no record of me, no way for her to even see a picture of me. Nothing but memory.
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Posted 4/16/17 , edited 4/16/17

Humms wrote:

.... You deleted everything from Facebook.


OK You Show dat Bitch whos boss !


But, to be fair.... there is more meaning behind all of this than people realize. And I should have explained that.

She has a really bad habit of keeping exes or guys who like her around, and kind of having a following.
She used to say, "If I really am as bad as they say I am, why does he still want to be with me?" All the time. Keeps photos of tgem, too.

So, for me, this was a symbolic, "I don't even want to exist on the same world as you."
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Posted 4/16/17 , edited 4/16/17
I've never been on a relationship so I wouldn't know if that's crazy but I think it's okay to do in a way. You should get rid of stuff about her on your fb, too if you still have them. You might end up moving on better if you don't find anything worth remembering, I think.


HolyDrumstick wrote:

But, to be fair.... there is more meaning behind all of this than people realize. And I should have explained that.

She has a really bad habit of keeping exes or guys who like her around, and kind of having a following.
She used to say, "If I really am as bad as they say I am, why does he still want to be with me?" All the time.

So, for me, this was a symbolic, "I don't even want to exist on the same world as you."


In that case, I think you did the right thing then.
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Posted 4/16/17
Done that.
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Posted 4/16/17
I think how you responded wasn't that bad of a response. It may be seen as a bit crazy since you deleted stuff off her account but i guess its justifiable if she put you through hell. BUT instead of making her block you, you should just block her, even if she tries to contact you, at some point in time, she'll get bored and understand you're tryna stay away from her annoying ass.

Idk what you could actually do in your situation tbh but just bare with it, patience is key, just keep yourself occupied with something else to keep your mind off your current situation - see family, friends, get back into hobbies, work more.

Much love again, you last thread was sad, this is even worse, I pray for your happiness man <3
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Posted 4/16/17
Pretty sure logging into her facebook and deleting everything is pretty unnecessary and also illegal.
Humms 
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Posted 4/16/17

HolyDrumstick wrote:


Humms wrote:

.... You deleted everything from Facebook.


OK You Show dat Bitch whos boss !


No, man. Everything is still on facebook. If you are on my Friends list. You can see all my stuff. Photos and everything.

I deleted everything of our time together off of HER Facebook before telling her to change her password.

Basically, I just made it so that there is no record of me, no way for her to even see a picture of me. Nothing but memory.


I'm sure that's exactly whats on her mind right now.

If that comes off as being rude, well.... What else can I say. Maybe you showed her a lesson
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Posted 4/16/17

HateKillingCamels wrote:

Pretty sure logging into her facebook and deleting everything is pretty unnecessary and also illegal.


No. Just deleted stuff with me or my daughters, first. And she gave me the password. She just didn'didn't change it until I told her "change your password, I don't want it."

But honestly, dgaf.
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Posted 4/16/17

HolyDrumstick wrote:
So, my question is, how crazy is my response? Opinions?


Not very crazy, and I can understand you wanting to expunge that info, and feeling good doing so, but

1) I think it's unwise and also, well, icky, when people share passwords
2) I think it was unethical to use the password that way, regardless of why you had it, and regardless of the fact that she was careless to not have changed it.

BTW, I've moved this to the Advice, Info, Recommendations forum.
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Posted 4/16/17

HolyDrumstick wrote:

No. Just deleted stuff with me or my daughters, first. And she gave me the password. She just didn'didn't change it until I told her "change your password, I don't want it."

But honestly, dgaf.


Just doing what you asked brah :^)
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