First  Prev  16  17  18  19  20  21  22  23  24  25  26  27  28  29  30  31  32  Next  Last
Post Reply Miss Gendering and Deadnaming.
36552 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
28 / M / St.Louis
Offline
Posted 9/7/17
that's what she said
208 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
17 / M / America.
Offline
Posted 9/8/17
It's difficult to not "misgender" people because of multiple reasons.

1: No one is a mind reader. I don't know if you identify as something I've never heard of before or if you're "cis" as the sjws call it.

2: It is habit for most people to use she if the person looks like a girl, and he if they look like a guy. I don't know a single person, sjw or not, who resorts to they or "ze."

3: Most people really just don't care about offending someone who has no importance in their life. If I'm at work checking someone out at my lane and end with a "Have a nice day ma'am!" and they reply saying I "misgendered" them, I'm not gonna care because I probably won't ever see them again.
3704 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
24 / M
Offline
Posted 9/26/17 , edited 9/26/17

papagolfwhiskey wrote:
Gender rather than sex. IS a social construct. It varies greatly from culture to culture. some cultures even have more than two genders. Some transfolk identify as neither or both or something other than the two genders. I don't understand why it must be something to mock?
Didn't find your other comment, but just going to post this here.
I had this confusion about gender and gender identites from not being a native english speaker (also that definitons around didn't help)
Although from the book DSM-5 by the American Psychiatric Association does state it more clearly which I find rather annoying when most have different meanings about it.

Gender is Not a Social Construct, Gender Dysphoria is Biological
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMxcVwcstug
(22:35)

The Transgender Agenda - what does the science say?
https://youtu.be/QXx1DuUIhmQ

Also that the Australian "safe" schools (another topic) does not help on the issue with identites vs disorders around kids and when they grow up.

To the use of He or She, male or female.
That got a lot better now, and where I stand on it.
77433 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
51 / F / Toronto
Offline
Posted 9/26/17

GooseMcDucks wrote:


papagolfwhiskey wrote:
Gender rather than sex. IS a social construct. It varies greatly from culture to culture. some cultures even have more than two genders. Some transfolk identify as neither or both or something other than the two genders. I don't understand why it must be something to mock?
Didn't find your other comment, but just going to post this here.
I had this confusion about gender and gender identites from not being a native english speaker (also that definitons around didn't help)
Although from the book DSM-5 by the American Psychiatric Association does state it more clearly which I find rather annoying when most have different meanings about it.

Gender is Not a Social Construct, Gender Dysphoria is Biological
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMxcVwcstug
(22:35)

The Transgender Agenda - what does the science say?
https://youtu.be/QXx1DuUIhmQ

Also that the Australian "safe" schools (another topic) does not help on the issue with identites vs disorders around kids and when they grow up.

To the use of He or She, male or female.
That got a lot better now, and where I stand on it.


That's good I guess. but I'm not sure what you are actually saying.

77433 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
51 / F / Toronto
Offline
Posted 9/26/17 , edited 9/26/17

GamingGodzilla wrote:

It's difficult to not "misgender" people because of multiple reasons.

1: No one is a mind reader. I don't know if you identify as something I've never heard of before or if you're "cis" as the sjws call it.

2: It is habit for most people to use she if the person looks like a girl, and he if they look like a guy. I don't know a single person, sjw or not, who resorts to they or "ze."

3: Most people really just don't care about offending someone who has no importance in their life. If I'm at work checking someone out at my lane and end with a "Have a nice day ma'am!" and they reply saying I "misgendered" them, I'm not gonna care because I probably won't ever see them again.


And since most people are not assholes most Transfolk won't give shits about it. It's actually harder to deal with someone profusely apologizing than forgiving a mistake and moving on. If you don't know. No one sane is going to give you hell for it. They might advise you beforehand or gently correct you the first time it comes up. As for dealing with Tellers. If I get sirred I just sigh and move on. It's not worth dying on that hill.


30946 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
21 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
Offline
Posted 9/26/17

GooseMcDucks wrote:


papagolfwhiskey wrote:
Gender rather than sex. IS a social construct. It varies greatly from culture to culture. some cultures even have more than two genders. Some transfolk identify as neither or both or something other than the two genders. I don't understand why it must be something to mock?
Didn't find your other comment, but just going to post this here.
I had this confusion about gender and gender identites from not being a native english speaker (also that definitons around didn't help)
Although from the book DSM-5 by the American Psychiatric Association does state it more clearly which I find rather annoying when most have different meanings about it.

Gender is Not a Social Construct, Gender Dysphoria is Biological
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vMxcVwcstug
(22:35)

The Transgender Agenda - what does the science say?
https://youtu.be/QXx1DuUIhmQ

Also that the Australian "safe" schools (another topic) does not help on the issue with identites vs disorders around kids and when they grow up.

To the use of He or She, male or female.
That got a lot better now, and where I stand on it.


I mean gender was made up societies in the world have had 3 genders at a time.
Gender Dysphoria is biological though.


Also people really believe the Australian Safe school crap ....jeez we had trouble debunking it over here for the morons who were using it to push a no vote surely others don't really take it serious right?
15159 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
100
Offline
Posted 9/26/17 , edited 9/26/17

papagolfwhiskey wrote:


GamingGodzilla wrote:

It's difficult to not "misgender" people because of multiple reasons.

1: No one is a mind reader. I don't know if you identify as something I've never heard of before or if you're "cis" as the sjws call it.

2: It is habit for most people to use she if the person looks like a girl, and he if they look like a guy. I don't know a single person, sjw or not, who resorts to they or "ze."

3: Most people really just don't care about offending someone who has no importance in their life. If I'm at work checking someone out at my lane and end with a "Have a nice day ma'am!" and they reply saying I "misgendered" them, I'm not gonna care because I probably won't ever see them again.


And since most people are not assholes most Transfolk won't give shits about it. It's actually harder to deal with someone profusely apologizing than forgiving a mistake and moving on. If you don't know. No one sane is going to give you hell for it. They might advise you beforehand or gently correct you the first time it comes up. As for dealing with Tellers. If I get sirred I just sigh and move on. It's not worth dying on that hill.




How would you feel if I gently and politely insisted that you pray before you started eating every time we ate together? How would you feel if you then later saw me complaining online about how you're religiously intolerant because you refuse to do so each time? Pretend for a moment that you aren't religious if you happen to be.

That's what I imagine it feels like for people who didn't grow up in a society where transgender stuff was "normal" to be told that they're doing something wrong by "misgendering" people.

Even for me, having grown up in a society where I was taught to accept that sort of thing, and having never developed any sort of belief that there was anything wrong with it, I feel uncomfortable with the idea of someone insisting "you have to refer to me this way." If you want to see yourself that way, that's fine - it's none of my business and I won't do anything about it. So stop trying to make it my business by insisting that everyone pretend to see it your way.
77433 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
51 / F / Toronto
Offline
Posted 9/26/17 , edited 9/26/17

gghadur77 wrote:


papagolfwhiskey wrote:


GamingGodzilla wrote:

It's difficult to not "misgender" people because of multiple reasons.

1: No one is a mind reader. I don't know if you identify as something I've never heard of before or if you're "cis" as the sjws call it.

2: It is habit for most people to use she if the person looks like a girl, and he if they look like a guy. I don't know a single person, sjw or not, who resorts to they or "ze."

3: Most people really just don't care about offending someone who has no importance in their life. If I'm at work checking someone out at my lane and end with a "Have a nice day ma'am!" and they reply saying I "misgendered" them, I'm not gonna care because I probably won't ever see them again.


And since most people are not assholes most Transfolk won't give shits about it. It's actually harder to deal with someone profusely apologizing than forgiving a mistake and moving on. If you don't know. No one sane is going to give you hell for it. They might advise you beforehand or gently correct you the first time it comes up. As for dealing with Tellers. If I get sirred I just sigh and move on. It's not worth dying on that hill.




How would you feel if I gently and politely insisted that you pray before you started eating every time we ate together? How would you feel if you then later saw me complaining online about how you're religiously intolerant because you refuse to do so each time? Pretend for a moment that you aren't religious if you happen to be.

That's what I imagine it feels like for people who didn't grow up in a society where transgender stuff was "normal" to be told that they're doing something wrong by "misgendering" people.


Even for me, having grown up in a society where I was taught to accept that sort of thing, and having never developed any sort of belief that there was anything wrong with it, I feel uncomfortable with the idea of someone insisting "you have to refer to me this way." If you want to see yourself that way, that's fine - it's none of my business and I won't do anything about it. So stop trying to make it my business by insisting that everyone pretend to see it your way.


Never once did I use the word insist. The usual word is preferred. and it's usually phrased as a request. As for prayer for me. It would depend on the prayer. I'm not religious myself but don't mind supporting the faith of others. If I found the prayer to be against my beliefs I would politely refuse. It's a free country you are free to consider me a heretic or unbeliever and an asshole for that refusal. I'm free to differ. As for feelings. I don't believe anyone, myself included, has a constitutional right to have their feelings protected.


PS as I have said before I think it's simple kind courtesy to address/refer to people as they wish. Maybe that's the Nurse in me for that's exactly what is expected of us on pain of discipline.
5533 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
23 / M
Offline
Posted 9/26/17

gghadur77 wrote:


papagolfwhiskey wrote:


GamingGodzilla wrote:

It's difficult to not "misgender" people because of multiple reasons.

1: No one is a mind reader. I don't know if you identify as something I've never heard of before or if you're "cis" as the sjws call it.

2: It is habit for most people to use she if the person looks like a girl, and he if they look like a guy. I don't know a single person, sjw or not, who resorts to they or "ze."

3: Most people really just don't care about offending someone who has no importance in their life. If I'm at work checking someone out at my lane and end with a "Have a nice day ma'am!" and they reply saying I "misgendered" them, I'm not gonna care because I probably won't ever see them again.


And since most people are not assholes most Transfolk won't give shits about it. It's actually harder to deal with someone profusely apologizing than forgiving a mistake and moving on. If you don't know. No one sane is going to give you hell for it. They might advise you beforehand or gently correct you the first time it comes up. As for dealing with Tellers. If I get sirred I just sigh and move on. It's not worth dying on that hill.




How would you feel if I gently and politely insisted that you pray before you started eating every time we ate together? How would you feel if you then later saw me complaining online about how you're religiously intolerant because you refuse to do so each time? Pretend for a moment that you aren't religious if you happen to be.

That's what I imagine it feels like for people who didn't grow up in a society where transgender stuff was "normal" to be told that they're doing something wrong by "misgendering" people.

Even for me, having grown up in a society where I was taught to accept that sort of thing, and having never developed any sort of belief that there was anything wrong with it, I feel uncomfortable with the idea of someone insisting "you have to refer to me this way." If you want to see yourself that way, that's fine - it's none of my business and I won't do anything about it. So stop trying to make it my business by insisting that everyone pretend to see it your way.


Imagine a scene in the 1920s. A man unknowing calls a tall flat chested (cis) woman sir. The woman says "actually I'm a woman". If the man kept on calling her him/mister/sir, the common perception would be that was his problem, and that he was being a jerk for no reason. Most people I find have no issue with correcting themselves about gender as long as transgenderedism isn't involved. If the mistake is made the request isn't seen as weird.
11311 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
35 / M / People's Republic...
Online
Posted 9/26/17
Ahhh yes, "misgendering" and "deadnaming", the rhetoric of divisive sexual extremists.
26190 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
26 / F / Various
Offline
Posted 9/26/17
I don't believe in gender, so I just try to use "they" for everyone...
81335 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
32 / M / Seattle
Online
Posted 9/26/17
There are plenty of issues that can arise from something like this. Here are two big ones that need to be addressed.

So first, are trans-people also held accountable to this law. For example, my trans manager regularly misgenders me. Since I am not trans does that manager get punished the same as if our positions are swapped? After all, the trans person is oppressed and well the law is only there to protect trans people right? I am not sure, I have not read the law on my own time, but from the stuff that was posted here I get the feeling. What is to stop a trans people from discriminating against non-trans people? Remember power corrupts, and it if it is not explicitly outlined that trans people can also be punished by this law then people will abuse it.

Second, how far will the law be taken? Lets say that I think you are stupid for this whole trans thing. So in the office I play ball, but out of the office I openly misgender you. Where is the line drawn for an average person or manager? Because we have a professional relationship does that mean that I have to properly gender you in my personal life whether or not I disagree with you? If I go online and post something about how I believe being trans is a psychological disorder does that mean I will be fired because I work with a trans person?

These kind of laws annoy me because no one thinks them through. I can agree that it is wrong to discriminate against people based on arbitrary biological factors. However, at the same time as a business owner or as a manager I would have duty to keep the team/company moral up. If this trans person is a distraction that is causing productivity to fall why do I have to keep them as an employee. Why do they get special "don't fire me" privileges when a normal person could do the same thing, cause a distraction that results in a fall in productivity, and be fired and no one would blink an eye? Both were harming the business in the same way by making it less productive, so why exactly is it not okay to fire both of them?

The lie people tell themselves is this is about rights that are perceived to not exist. It is wrong to fire people for obnoxious reasons like religions or political beliefs, as long as they are not causing obvious harm to an office. Same goes for people who would call themselves trans. However, if I have a trans person in the office who is going around making a scene every single time they perceive there is a transgression against them. They deserve to lose their employment just the same as anyone who goes around being a disturbance.
5533 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
23 / M
Offline
Posted 9/26/17

karatecowboy wrote:

Ahhh yes, "misgendering" and "deadnaming", the rhetoric of divisive sexual extremists.


"your being divisive" and "stop stirring the pot" are as old as dirt.You hear it even more often from places that advertise themselves as collectivist. Transexuals are among the most likely to be victims of violence, and you expect them to be quite, while they try to change that? With democracies and free speech it is now theoretically possible to do this without going all French revolution on people, However things tend to not get done if everyone stays quite and speaks only the way other people want them to. That is if everyone stay easily ignorable.
5475 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
28 / M
Offline
Posted 9/26/17
People really care if they miss gender someone? Because I don't. I won't even apologize.
First  Prev  16  17  18  19  20  21  22  23  24  25  26  27  28  29  30  31  32  Next  Last
You must be logged in to post.