Post Reply My anime idea, what do you think?
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27 / M / florida
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Posted 8/11/17
hello everyone, id like to start and say thank you if you post your opinion of my anime idea, i have been working on it for 10 years and am writing a chapter book on it atm for self publish only, the reson why im posting my idea to the public now is i want to inspire new or vet anime/manga directors into making more sci fi action anime like gundam and ghost in the shell! also id like to see what anime fans like of my ideas as well, just dont troll or be a jerk please.




anime name: NEX-GEN BLADE

type: sci fi, action, mystery, adventure

planed chapters: 90 in book 1


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prologue(short)

during an era before earth and the sol system, lied planet Zenitaia[ zen it aee ah], a earth like planet that was the home to the human-like alien race known as Maggnoriyions[magg nor e ons]a highly advanced empire like race that ruled over the galaxy with justice and a hierarchy of a dictatorship ruled by a king and queen, they protected the milky way for any hostile threat in the cosmos. for twelve thousand years they led the galaxy to its golden age, in till they finally met there match. generations past and now whats left of this empire is being hunted by a unbeatable enemy known as the Taritac[tare re tac]. will they survive or will there luck and chances run out and who is this man calling himself the "Xormotic[zor mon tic]?

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this story is a "out there" sci fi, more along the lines of a non anime title, but i wanted to make it into an anime so badly that for 10 years i tried and tried to make connections and do the work, hard work in art classes but alas it was all for not. so the prologue was a little short and made little sense, thats due to i cant for the life of me make a prologue as you can see im a novice writer that still inspires for my story to get out in the world, so to clear things up with the prologue ill explain stuff in more detail with a short history lesson and in depth of the main characters and enemy below.
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Maggnoriyion race:

also known as Maggs for sort, they where a race of peaceful humans that has special immortal powers that could live forever without aging above 30 years due to the radiation in Zenitaia's rings. for five thousand years the Maggnoriyions grew and so did there technology, as it stands they where the first race in the milky way galaxy to get into space and advance there culture, thus when new intelligent alien races where found, they put them under there galactic protection as long as they integrated there entire society into theirs and followed the kings demands.

250 years before earth was formed in the sol system, the Maggnoriyion race met a powerful foe known as the Taritac, a race of techno-organic sentient aliens that have the unique ability to assimilate nearly all life and technology in the universe. at first the maggnoriyions tried to talk to them peacefully, but where met with assimilation, when they reached maggnoriyion space they wiped out everything that was organic and technology, the races banded together, massing millions of ships to push them back out of there space, but in a matter of 5 months the Taritac was in Zenitaias orbit! today the maggnoriyion race is only numbering in the tens of thousands and living on ark ships in the fleet of "HOPE".


antagonist: taritac

the Taritac are from the Andromeda galaxy, after assimilating all known life there they headed to the milky way that took eons since there living ships do not posses faster then light capabilities. after arriving in the milky way they started again to assimilate all life and technology. it is unknown why they do this to anyone and all forms of comunication where left with them being assimilated. the Taritac are a techno-organic sentient race able to change there form at will and in doing so makes them very dangerous. taritac ships are large concentrated forms of multiple taritac's forming starships for space travel, able to literally make themselves into a giant space craft with laser based weapons and plasma engines. planet side they can transform into humanoid soldiers to mech like tanks and fighter crafts. over a thousand known alien races with highly advanced technology levels have fought the taritac and lost, meaning full assimilation and where never heard of again.


main character: Ryejin Yamato



bio: Ryejin is the last heir to the maggnoriyion thrown, son of the king of the era of the golden age and immortal warrior of the kings army, chosen by the high priestess of zenitaia to save what was left of his race, he leads his people under the title of king of the second era. being at a mature age he was well vetted in the line of succession after his father was killed on the front lines of war. timid in nature he has a wife named Ayana who fights by his side as his "knight". hes very well gifted and a strong warrior able to out think his opponent and coming up with a dozen countermeasures within seconds thanks to the "training of the mind" by his teacher the Tactician.


main character 2: Ayana Yamato

no image of her sadly

bio: Ayana is the wife of Ryejin going on 300 years, she is a in short terms, a bad-ass tom boy who loves her guns, she is always seen in the ark city ships gun ranges testing modifications to her assault rifle designed to kill the taritac. she is the same age as Ryejin only do to being in cryo sleep for hundreds of years and appears the same age as him. her personality is rough as nails when shes mad and in battle but when around Ryejin she turns into a typical high school girl thats to mellow to talk to her secret school crush. she has a pet bird, the last of its kind in there home called Niico, the bird is strikingly similar to a Cardinal from earth and she cherishes him. even being a maggnoriyion only the most gifted have powers, super natural abilities that defy the reality like Ryejin has, but Ayana is more mortal besides her never ending life and not aging. during any giving day he will always be by Ryejins side and swore a oath to never leave him unless it in in battle.


main character 3: the Tactician

casually called Tac as a nickname, he uses the alias "Tactician" for his name instead of his real name that none of the forty thousand survivors have ever heard. Tac is a maggnoriyion of super human geniuses that given sixty seconds can form over a thousand countermeasures and plans in the middle of a fight or before one. to Ryejins father he is the god of war and intelligence, do to never loosing a fight before the taritac showed up in twelve thousand years of service to the king. he is always on duty and takes a drug so that he never needs to sleep, but do to this he is very short tempered and when in battle is known for sacrificing thousands to there deaths in order to win.

today Tac appears in a red colored navel admiral uniform and do to the war with the taritac lost his left eye in battle and has a black eye patch over it never to get it replaced he carries it as a reminder of the older, more brutal self he cast aside. Tac is the oldest living maggnoriyion known to present and has a estimated IQ of 500 in human terms.
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think this is enough for now i got pages of pages of this stuff with like 20 characters that would have been in the show, but from this so far, what do you think of the story, characters etc?

p.s. ignore my grammar and punctuation its one of my faults so i use a program thats speech to text but atm its broken so.
47567 cr points
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26 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 8/11/17
This doesn't belong in this section. It needs to go to Creative Corner.
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27 / M / florida
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Posted 8/11/17

qualeshia3 wrote:

This doesn't belong in this section. It needs to go to Creative Corner.


sorry first time in the forums
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26 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 8/11/17

RyejinYamato wrote:


qualeshia3 wrote:

This doesn't belong in this section. It needs to go to Creative Corner.


sorry first time in the forums


That's okay. No need to be sorry. You made a mistake. Did you draw that picture because it looks really good?
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27 / M / florida
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Posted 8/11/17

qualeshia3 wrote:


RyejinYamato wrote:


qualeshia3 wrote:

This doesn't belong in this section. It needs to go to Creative Corner.


sorry first time in the forums


That's okay. No need to be sorry. You made a mistake. Did you draw that picture because it looks really good?


no it was a art commission the name on the image is the artiest.
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Posted 8/11/17 , edited 8/11/17

RyejinYamato wrote:

no it was a art commission the name on the image is the artiest.


Well, it's still cool.
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22 / O / Brazil/Portugal
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Posted 8/11/17
Hey! I read it all, so thought I'd gave my 2 cents. The art is very good, but from what I read you do need to work on story telling - the idea is interesting, but it's not laid out in a way that really makes it shine. There are free storytelling courses, so you can look into it (like these https://www.coursera.org/learn/craft-of-plot https://www.khanacademy.org/partner-content/pixar/storytelling). I've seen many great stories that haven't (and most likely never will) get the attention they deserve due to storytelling.

I think it's good you recognize grammar and punctuation are things you need to work on, and (imo) it should be your priority. Somethings are a bit confusing due to it. I'm interesting in reading all you got tbh, so if it's on google docs or somewhere I can read later I'd like to check it out.
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