OMFG! MILO HAS A DIARY!?

Fuck My Motherfucking Life.
Sunday, November 8th.
Today was pretty much the worst day of my life.
I loved you.
I fucked up everything, as always...
I lost pretty much fucking everything now...
Cause I'm suck a fuckin dumbass..I hate myself so much right now.
God, I just..i wish I was never alive.
You deserved better anyway.
I'm ugly, stupid, stubborn, emotional..
idk..I am currently hating the fuck out my life and myself right now.
I never dreamt of this day..
Well, I knew I'd screw something up, but I didn't know it'd be coming this soon...
I just wish it was different.
I don't think I can ever fall in love again..not after this..
I'm crying so hard right now..there's no point in fighting back the tears anymore...
You were the only thing that made me happy..
Just the hope that I'd talk to you for at least..5 minutes cheered me up..
But I don't have even that anymore.
Look, I'm sorry for wasting your time.
For even existing..
I'm sorry I ever loved you or that you loved me.
So hate me, hate me for the worthless peice of shit that everybody knows that I am.
I really just..don't know what to do with myself anymore.
Just sit here and fucking rot..
Just, whatever.
- MJG
November 12th 2009
iiii am falling for you.
iiii can't handle it.
the way you make me feel is just, indescribable..
but i know that I absolutely love it.
I feel my stomach twist and turn on the inside..
It's crazy...
I'm talking to you right now..and all I can think of to say is..I LOVE YOU
but i'm too nervous..
You're just so perfect for me...
I'm always missing you when you're gone.
You just have this weird affect on me..I like it.
I'm so addicted <3
11/12/09 - We fell in love.
November 14th 2009
I love my Aiden.
He's so perfect.
He makes me feel everything Iv'e never felt before. And in weird combonations..
He's so beautiful. He's so good to me..
I love making him smile..and giggle.. I just love him, and being with him. He's my baby. And nothing can change that.
I really don't wanna hurt him.. Ever. So I'm trying super super hard! Cause I love him.
So far, there's been no temptations. No Wants..except for him.
He's everything i want right now..I don't desire anything else.
Everybody else can say whatever the fuck they want about me. Call me a whore. Call me stupid.
Call me a lier. A cheater. People need to get their fucking facts straight before they talk shit about me.
Sure, I've made mistakes before. I'm man enough to admit to that.
But obviously, you're not mature enough to fucking let stupid shit like that go..
If you fuckin knew me, just a little bit..then maybe you'd understand?
I dunno. I'm just fucking sick of it.
I try to make everyone else feel better, and when I feel like shit..they just call me out on it, say I'm suicidal, or emo or w/e else and just make everything worse. A lot of the time, I feel really alone..I don't feel like I have any friends at all..I hate it.
I just wanna feel for once that somebody actually cares.
Besides Aiden, he's always there for me.. I can't think of a time where he's ever not been there. And Chris too, even if he's not there 24/7 he's always there when I need him. He's my fucking best friend.
Nobody else could EVER be a better friend than he has to me...
And Felicity. And Salo. And Autumn.
Ugghhh. I miss Aiden so much. He's just so..yummm.
And one thing i don't get..is why Adam left me for me being "suicidal"
I never left him for believing all the lies that everyone told him and running away from me.
God, people are just fucking stupid.
I hate everything. And Everyone. Cause they're all assholes..and nothing ever makes sense. It's retarded.
And I love everything. And everyone that truly loves me... Cause they're my best friends. My lovers. And they're mine.
and I'm keeping them. <3

I FUCKING HATE EVERYTHING.
Stupid fucking matthew.
I hate you. You dont even know me. But you already made me fuckin hate you.
Everything's stupid..I hate it...Just shoot me..
Nobody cares..I'm trying so hard to be good..to not hurt anybody but it's fucking hard when everyone's pushing my motherfucking buttons..
I feel like I'm just gonna COMBUST.
Ughhhhh. Just fuck life. Fucking fuck it.
Nov. 15th 09.
Whatever. I'll give in. Just for you.
Have it your way. Blame me.
I just don't care anymore.
I'm sorry that I'm so motherfucking fucked up that I supposively fuck everything up for you.
I'm sorry that I'm human and I have flaws and make mistakes.
I'm sorry that I'm fucking 17 years old and no longer have time to play these stupid little games anymore. I'm sorry that PEOPLE CHANGE and that I take things more seriously now.
I'm sooo fucking sorry that I came into your life.
That I made you give a shit about me.
That I ruin everything. I'm sorry that you hate me. That there's so much drama.
Blame me. Put everything on me. I don't care.
I'll apologize for whatever.
Make it all my fault. Everythings my fault anyway isn't it?
I'm sorry that I'm not a fucking robot and I have feelings and actually know how to EXPRESS THEM!
I'm just fucking sorry ok?
So do what you want. Dont be my friend. Don't talk to me. Pretend like I never existed. Like you never even knew my name. That I was never created on this shitty ass Earth.
Sorry.
Goodbye.