HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF MEN'S WAREHOUSE.


NOW THIS IS A STORY ALL ABOUT HOW

EVERY PERSON IN THIS WORLD CAN'T RESIST MY PLOW

AND I'D LIKE TO TAKE A MINUTE TO TALK TO YOU ABOUT MY KIT

YOU'LL LIKE THE WAY IT LOOKS...I GUARANTEE IT.


IN NEW YORK CITY, BORN AND RAISED

POLISHING MY PISTOL'S HOW I SPENT MY DAYS

FINGERING, TINKERING, TOUCHING UP MY TOOL

CLEANING IT AND MAKING ALL THE LOVELY LADIES DROOL


WHEN SUPERMAN FELL FROM THE SKIES ABOVE,

SAID, "I CAN PWN YOUR PURPLE-HELMETED WARRIOR OF LOVE".

SO I GAVE HIM A TASTE OF MY PILE-DRIVING PLEXUS

AND REALIZED, "I SHOULD MAKE MEN'S SUITS IN TEXAS".


I HAILED FOR A CAB AND WHEN IT CAME NEAR

IT HAD A STICKER THAT SAID "OBJECTS SMALLER IN MIRROR".

I SAID TO THE CABBIE "I CAN PROVE THAT WRONG!"

SO I SHOWED THE GOOD SIR MY SIZABLE SCHLONG

IT VERILY WAS A SIGHT THAT HE JUST COULDN'T QUIT

AND THAT'S WHEN I FIRST PROCLAIMED "I GUARANTEE IT!"


I PULLED UP TO MY MANSION WITH A TRUCK OF WOMEN

AND GAVE THEM ALL A TASTE OF MY OMNIPOTENT SEMEN

LOOKED AT MY KINGDOM AND KNEW I WOULD FIT

AND THAT'S HOW I CAME TO SAY, "I GUARANTEE IT!"


btw, I see that the new badge is Pedobear


This is Nana. I have creepy a fanboyism for her:

I've had dream sex with Nana once. Shit was SO cash.

Oh, yeah baby take it off:

WTF!!!

Speaking of dreams, my favorite anime Haruhi of the North Star only exists in my dreams:


I also have a great affinity for ecchi:

again wtf?

I watch American television too, but Western society disapproves of my overindulgence of anime


If you ever wonder what the hell my problem is, take a look at how I see the world every day:


Well, image macros and gifs aside, on to other matters.

Anime I've seen every episode of:
Ratings:
* An epic failure
** Boring or flawed
*** Kind of fun
**** Pretty damn good
***** Legendary


Cowboy Bebop *****
Outlaw Star *****
Tenchi Muyo! Ryo-Ohki***
Tenchi Universe****
Tenchi in Tokyo***
Trigun *****
G-Gundam **
Silent Mobius **
Hokuto no Ken****
Neon Genesis Evangelion ****
Naruto **
Naruto Shippuuden (so far) ***
Ah! My Goddess Season 1+2 ***
Crest of the Stars **
Black Lagoon ****
Chobits ****
Elfin Lied ****
Great Teacher Onizuka *****
Death Note *****
He is my Master *
Higurashi no Nako Koro Ni *****
Higurashi no Nako Koro Ni Kia ***
Lucky Star ***
Azumanga Diaoh ****
Gantz ****
Princess Monanoke ***
Akira ***
Hellsing *****
NANA ****
Monster ****
School Days **
Dragon Ball Z **
Yu-Gi-Oh (season 1) *
Afro Samurai ****
Golden Boy ****
Detective Conan (season 1) **
Full Metal Panic ***
Full Metal Panic Fummaffu ****
Fruits Basket ****
Read or Die (the TV) **
Betterman *
Claymore *****
Berserk *****
Excel Saga *****
Fooly Cooly (FLCL) *****
Hajime No Ippo ****
Escaflowne ***
Inuyasha *
The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya ****
Peferfect Blue ****
Colorful ****
Duel! Parallel double adventure ***
Serial Experiments Lain ****
Ghost Hunt ****
XXXHOLiC****
Mind Game***
Heroic Age****
Karin***
Rozen Maiden***
Rozen Maiden Traumend***
Genshiken****
Genshiken 2****
Full Metal Alchemist****
Kaiji*****
Clannad***
School Rumble****
School Rumble Ni Gakki (Second semester)****
Love Hina****
Code Geass*****
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