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SOME INTERESTING STUFF
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Dear Technical Support,

18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates 4.2, which I had used for years without any trouble. However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products and the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off. To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other applications, such as LadsNightOut 3.1, Football 4.5, and Playboy 6.9. Successive versions of GirlFriend proved no better.

I tried a shareware program, Slapper 2.1, but it had many bugs and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks. Eventually, I tried to run GirlFriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.

I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. While Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled with FreeSexPlus and Cleanhouse2005.

Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 could be very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them. Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail filter, and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and Multi-Whinge. These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what the problem is.

Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly, requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Saab 93 Convertible hard drive, it often crashes.

Wife 1.0 also comes with an irritating pop-up called MotherInLaw, which can't be turned off.

Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2005, but there could be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2005, it tends to delete all of your Money before uninstalling itself.

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"Stewardesses" is the longest word typed with only the left hand and "lollipop" with your right.
(Bet you tried this out mentally, didn't you?)

"Dreamt" is the only English word that ends in the letters "MT".
(Are you doubting this?)

The words 'racecar,' 'kayak' and 'level' are the same whether they are read left to right or right to left (palindromes).
(Yep, I knew you were going to "do" this one.)

A goldfish has a memory span of three seconds.

TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

A shark is the only fish that can blink with both eyes.

A snail can sleep for three years.

An ostrich's eye is bigger than its brain.

Almonds are a member of the peach family.

Babies are born without kneecaps. They don't appear until the child reaches 2 to 6 years of age.

February 1865 is the only month in recorded history not to have a full moon.

One thing that our eyes cant see but our bodies can feel is the infrared radiation.

Leonardo Da Vinci invented the scissors.

Peanuts are one of the ingredients of dynamite!

The average person's left hand does 56% of the typing.

There are more chickens than people in the world.

Winston Churchill was born in a ladies' room during a dance.

Women blink nearly twice as much as men.

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Three things in life that, once gone, never come back -

Time
Words
Opportunity

Three things in life that may never be lost -

Peace
Hope
Honesty

Three things in life that are most valuable -

Love
Self-confidence
Friends

Three things in life that are never certain -

Dreams
Success
Fortune

Three things that make a man/woman -

Hard work
Sincerity
Commitment

Three things in life that can destroy a man/woman -

Alcohol
Pride
Anger

Three things in life that, once lost, hard to build-up -

Respect
Trust
Friendship

Three things in life that never fail


True Love
Determination
Belief