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Post Reply Never Again ~ cont.
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26 / F / In my own little...
Posted 9/20/09 , edited 11/14/09
*** Find the first section of Never Again HERE ***

Characters ://

Eyes :: Red-Orange . . . Hair :: Red . . . Female . . . Age 18 . . . Amy Zimmers

Joshua Belham . . . Age 25 . . . Male . . . Hair :: Dirty Blond . . . Eyes :: Blue

Eyes :: Brown . . . Fur :: Golden . . . Male . . . Age 18 . . . Sir Hopsalot

Marian Jones . . . Age 61 . . . Female . . . Hair :: Gray . . . Eyes :: Green

Contents ://

Part Cinq - Never Again
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . {{
}} . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Part Six - Returning Past
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . {{
One Heart
Two Promises
Three Words
Four Years
Five Lies
}} . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Part Sept - Africa
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . {{
First Plane Ride
First in a Long Time
First Shot
First Confrontation
First Adventure
First and Only
}} . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Part Huit - Once Again
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . {{
The End
}} . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

PaRT CiNQ :// NeVeR aGaiN

. . . . ::: lEttErs ::: . . . .

Amy was quiet and reclusive for the next week. She felt betrayed and she didn’t know where to turn.

But he had said he would write… He’d said he loved her. He’d kissed her.

Amy had faith… she knew he would come back to her, and that he’d keep his promise to write to her every week. That was the power of her love.

When the first letter came, she was livelier than she’d been in a long time. She rushed to her aunt, who held the letter out to her, and took it in hands trembling with excitement.

“Aunt Marian, I told you he would write me!” Her aunt had had some doubts.

Amy took the letter to her room and opened it quickly.

My dearest Miss Amy,
I hope you do not hate me too much for leaving you…

How could I ever hate you? Amy shook her head and continued reading.

I’m sure you know that this is not the normal few-week-long trip… I miss you terribly, Miss Amy. But I am very busy at the moment and can’t come to see you. I know you will understand. It was funny, yesterday I saw in a shop window a book you were carrying around one day, and I remembered what you told me about it. You said it was a good book, so I bought it and plan to read it tonight. I’m sorry I don’t have more to report; I’ve been busy but I do not want to bore you with my work. I trust that you and your Aunt are well? Give her my regards, if you could. I’ll write again soon.

Amy frowned slightly. She’d been expecting a longer letter, and not one so formal sounding. And there was no return address, so she couldn’t write him back! She sighed and put the letter on her desk, and lay on her bed for a few minutes before getting up to wander the garden again.

During the next week, Amy seemed to be in a better mood. She was used to spending weeks at a time without her father and Joshua, so this was okay for now. She wondered how long it would be though…

But whichever way things turned out, she spoke with her aunt a lot, and grew to enjoy her company.

By the time she got another letter from Joshua the next week, she was optimistic about things and smiled cheerfully.

But when she was done reading the letter, she was frowning again. It was shorter than the last one.

But still, she thought. I’m still getting letters from him. All will be fine.

And she continued to get letters from him, every week. They were short, and didn’t really say much but he was writing to her. And each one ended with “I love you, Miss Amy.” It was hard to deal with his absence but she could do it with his help.

But soon, one week turned into two. Two weeks without word from him turned into a month. A month turned into five weeks. And then, all letters stopped coming. By the time Amy was sixteen, Joshua had stopped writing altogether.

Amy sulked around her Aunt’s house more and more, spending her time worrying about when Joshua would next write to her. Some part of her still believed he would keep his promise, that he was just too busy with work.

But another part knew he wouldn’t write. It countered with, if I was that important to him work wouldn’t stop him. It looked back on her happy childhood and saw it all for lies. All his words, all his actions; they were all lies.

The pain and heartbreak she’d first felt when he left grew into resentment, and after a long time, the resentment faded into a cold acceptance. But her heart was permanently changed; she would never love again.

Never Again.


. . . . ::: OnE hEArt ::: . . . .

It was the day after her eighteenth birthday.

She was sitting with her Aunt in the garden, chatting about the latest gossip in town. In the past four years, she’d grown to love this house nearly as much as she’d loved her own. But she would have to leave it soon. She was of age now and her father’s possessions were in her hands now. She would go back to her home, and live there alone with her servants.

She was troubled to find that she didn’t look forward to it. She knew everything she saw would make her think of Joshua; and thinking of Joshua these days meant she would be in a foul mood and it made her upset.

“Aunt Marian, will you come and visit me at home?” She was asking.

Her aunt nodded gently. “Of course, dear. I’ll miss having you in the house…” She sighed. “But it’s for the better, you’re an adult now. You must act like one now. And luckily your father left all of his money to you. You won’t have to work and can live in peace.” She smiled gently. She was getting older, and she would have forgiven Amy’s father, if she could see him again. Amy had told her over the years so much of her life with her father. Once Marian had realized that Amy had been truly happy with her father, she’d been able to accept the fact that he was a decent man, and when Amy told her of all the times he’d told her about her mother, Marian had finally decided she could not still hold a grudge.

And now Amy would be leaving her, going back to the place where she’d lived with her father. And Joshua…

Since Joshua’s leaving, Marian had been uneasy. She still believed that he had a lot of the same qualities as her sister had had, and had been hopeful, like Amy, that he would return and continue to write to her. But he’d stopped writing…

Marian had come to think of Joshua with a slight distaste, but not nearly as much as Amy did. Marian still had a spark of hope that he would redeem himself.

But Amy had been much more hurt by him than she had. He’d had the girl’s heart in his hands, and had all but killed it. He may not have meant to, but he did know that Amy would be upset by his leaving. She didn’t know why he had stopped writing…

But she still hoped that he would come back and save Amy’s heart.

She’d watched her niece carefully; she didn’t open her heart to anyone. Amy only spoke freely with her aunt, and had brick walls around her heart. It almost seemed as if she was afraid of letting anyone in. Or maybe she didn’t see any point in letting people in any more. Marian didn’t want her niece to end up the way she had; alone and old.

She wanted her niece to be with the one she loved.

And she knew Amy must still love Joshua, somewhere in her. She would have moved on and fallen in love again if she was completely over her first love.

Marian sighed, and walked with Amy back into the house.

. . . . ::: twO prOmIsEs ::: . . . .

The next day, Amy hugged her aunt tightly. “I expect a letter from you often, and you must come and visit me soon!” She said, still hugging her.

Marian nodded and patted Amy on the back. “I’ll visit you within the month, darling, and write to you in between. I promise.”

Amy let go uncertainly and got into the car, and Marian watched her niece leave with a sigh. She’d seen the papers this morning. She was glad that Amy didn’t read the papers… If she did, she might not have gone back home.

And they’d gotten a letter in the mail today…

She’d slipped it into her niece’s bag. It would be better if she didn’t read it before she was already home.

. . . . ::: thrEE wOrds ::: . . . .

Amy stepped through the front doors of her home, and looked around. All the white blankets that had been put over everything had been removed before she got there; the maids and servants had been working hard to make the place livable after such a long time of disuse.

Mrs. Coles was standing at the staircase, and greeted Amy warmly.

“Welcome back home, Miss Amy,” she said as she hugged Amy.

The staff was the same as it had been when she was a child, and she smiled a little. It did feel good to be back home after so long. But she felt a bit of a stranger now.

And it wasn’t just that. Everything she looked at made her think about some adventure she and Joshua had gone on as children, and made her heart harden even more.

She buried those feelings in her heart, and climbed the stairs to the room that had been hers. It would still be hers; she didn’t feel right taking the room that had been her father’s, even if she was the Mistress of the house now. A maid carried her bag up after her.

She sighed when she got into the room, and looked around.

It looked smaller.

Or perhaps she’d gotten bigger.

She sat on the edge of her bed, and looked out the window as the maid left. Amy wanted to put her things away on her own; living four years in a house with only three maids had made her appreciate doing some things for herself.

And then she found something she hadn’t put in there. It was a letter. It said “Miss Amy” on the front.

She knew the handwriting well. She’d watched its owner writing letters home so much as a child. And there was only one person who would always call her Miss Amy even though he was so close to her.

She dropped the letter and it fell to the ground; she wanted to tear it up right then and there.

But she wanted to read it too.

She stood in indecision for a few minutes, and then squared her shoulders, reaching down to the letter. She ripped it in half.

I’ll never speak to him again. I’ll never forgive him. I’ll never love him again!

Just to be sure, she walked to the fire that a maid had previously started in her room’s fireplace and threw the two halves of the letter in, then walked out of the room.

The envelope burned away.

The paper inside of it got black at the edges and started to curl as the flames ate it hungrily.

The first words disappeared as the blackness made its way down the letter. “I can’t even begin to say how sorry I am…”

The middle words were gone. “I’d understand completely if you hated me…”

The words in between were no more; they were unreadable.

And then the last words, three simple words, disappeared as the corner of the paper curled over it and the black around the edges grew. “I love you.”

And all the words were gone now.

Amy never saw any of them.

. . . . ::: fOUr yEArs ::: . . . .

Two days had passed. For the past 48 hours, Amy had been getting used to living at home again.

But it was odd.

She felt like she had two homes now. She had one here, and one with Aunt Marian.

She was sitting in her father’s study now, looking through some of his old notes. These were the notes she’d learned to read from. She remembered sounding out words like “cell” and “bone” and other such Biological terms. She’d surprised one of her earliest tutors when she spelled out and defined deoxyribonucleic acid, more commonly known as DNA. At age five.

She was smiling as she remembered those times with her father. And then a frown made it’s way onto her features as she remembered the times after that; the times with Joshua. They were still lies. She wished the memories could make her happy, like the ones of her father did. But how could a lie make one happy?

She sighed and put the notes down. She’d been wondering for a while now…

In her father’s will, Joshua had been the one to receive all of his work related things. And he’d been the caretaker of everything else until Amy was of age to take them herself.

So where was he now? Why hadn’t he come and watched over her father’s things? Watched over her?

She had to restrain herself, lest she crumple up the new set of notes she’d picked up. She didn’t want to damage any of her father’s precious things…

In four years she’d grown so bitter…

Four years had seen her blooming beautifully on the outside… but on the inside she’d been slowly rotting away, starting from the heart.

She sighed and put that set of notes down as well, closing the drawer they were kept in.

As she slowly made her way to the door, she heard a car pull up through the window. Aunt Marian must have come! So soon! Amy picked up her skirts and ran out the door and down the stairs. She’d only been gone two days, but she already missed her Aunt dearly.

A maid rushed into the house and through a door suddenly, and a butler opened the door for Aunt Marian.

But Amy’s face fell. It hardened.

It wasn’t Aunt Marian.

She stood motionless, as did her guest, for some time. And then…

Her shoes made a tap, tap, tap as she strode to him.

She stared up at him.

She slapped him hard across the cheek.

“Why the HELL are you here Joshua?! How dare you show your face in this house!”

Joshua took a few stunned steps back. “Y-you didn’t read my letter, did you…?”

The words he’d written were still fresh in his mind.

“My dearest Miss Amy,
I can’t even begin to say how sorry I am… I’d understand completely if you hated me. What I did was unforgivable. But I know deep down that all will end well… I’m coming home! After four years of work, work, work… Nothing but work… But that work has paid off, Miss Amy! No doubt, by now you will have seen it in the papers. It’s finally done; I can come back home… I’ll be home no later than a few days after you get this letter… I love you.

Amy didn’t falter. “What would it matter if I read the letter or not!? FOUR YEARS! You left me for four years, and I’m supposed to let you back into my life, as if nothing happened?” She had angry tears in her eyes now.

Joshua took a step forward. “N-no… well, I’d like it if you did…. But I didn’t expect it to be easy…” He looked down, and then back up at Amy.

“Miss Amy…” He held out his hand. “I… need your help.”

. . . . ::: fIvE lIEs ::: . . . .

Amy stared at him, still frowning furiously. “Why should I help you?”

Joshua paused, and took another step closer. She took a step back defiantly.

“Because… I’m asking you.” Joshua hoped he hadn’t lost the influence he’d used to have on her… “Because you’re the only one who can help me with this.”

She glared at him. “And why’s that?”

Joshua looked down. “You remember those birds, right? The ones in Africa that keep getting sick?”

She looked away. “Of course I do.” She didn’t tell him that she’d kept the pin he made her, that first time he left on a trip with her father. She didn’t even know why she hadn’t thrown it away. She was going to… and then, she hadn’t had the heart to do it.

“They’re sick again…” He said. “I tried to find some notes of your father’s about them… but they weren’t there. I know you have those note memorize, Miss Amy…”

She narrowed her eyes at him again. “Oh, so you just want me to read off some notes to you so you can go back to your precious work in Africa?”

Joshua was silent for some time. “No, I want you to come with me to Africa…”

She stared, dumbfounded. The idea of going to Africa… even when her heart was hardened, she still loved the idea of going on adventures… but with Joshua…?

“It would be just like old times,” he offered. Wrong thing to say.

“So it would be a lie too?” She shot back.

“A lie? What lies have I ever told you…?”

“Does this sound familiar to you? ‘I promise to write to you every week.’ When you said you’d always be with me? All the games we played? What you said to me all those times I fell asleep in your bed? When you said you loved me?”
She was about to slap him again. “All of those were nothing but lies!” Five lies, lies that had turned her heart cold.

Joshua frowned. “The first two I can admit I wasn’t fully honest about… But the last one has never been, is not, and never will be a lie.” Amy looked away, not believing him.

“And I did mean to write you every week. Honestly! But there were times when I wasn’t able to even get to a piece of paper, and after a year I was almost completely cut off from civilization!”

Amy stayed silent. “Miss Amy… please… Don’t you want to go on an adventure?” He knew her too well. She might have grown to hate him, but she would never hate adventure… and he had hope that she wouldn’t hate him for long. This time, he would do things right. He just needed the chance.

Amy crossed her arms. “Fine. I’ll help you. But only for my Father’s memory and for the sake of those birds. NOT for you.”

Joshua’s face broke out in a grin. “Thanks, Miss Amy…”

It was then that Amy realized he’d slid back into his farm accent since he left. He really must not have been around many people if he had reverted back to that. But that didn’t matter. She told herself that it didn’t make her happy to hear it.

They would leave tomorrow.

PaRT SePT :// aFRiCa

. . . . ::: fIrst plAnE rIdE ::: . . . .

The next morning, when Amy woke up, she had a heavy heart. Despite all the hardening her heart had done, she couldn’t handle the pressure, and had cried herself to sleep last night.

So when she walked to the car slightly red in the eyes and looking half asleep, Joshua rushed to her side. “Miss Amy…! Are you alright?”

She frowned at him with cold eyes. “Just fine,” she snapped, and got in the car.

The ride was silent, and though Amy was fascinated when they got to the airport where they would get onto the plane to Africa, she still did not talk to Joshua. He tried many times to get her to talk to him.

“Miss Amy, are you tired?”

“Miss Amy, would you like to read a book…?”

“Miss Amy, aren’t you excited to finally be going to Africa?”

“Miss Amy….”

“Miss Amy….”

He could see the excitement in her eyes, and in the way she moved… but if she would not talk to him at all, it brought him no joy.

Finally, when they got onto the plane and Amy was too bewildered to be silent, she said, “So this is what it’s like in the inside of a plane…”

Joshua smiled and nodded. “Yes… here are our seats, Miss Amy. Would you like to sit on the isle or by the window?”

Amy realized she’d spoken to him, and looked away, frustrated. Without answering, she sat by the window and stared out of it.

Joshua sighed and sat down next to her, buckling his seatbelt. He glanced over at Amy and whispered, “Miss Amy, be sure to buckle the seatbelt… and don’t be worried if the plane shakes a little when we get into the air…”

Amy buckled up without a word, and still didn’t look at him. He sighed.

As the plane started moving, Amy was looking excited, but a little nervous as well. Joshua looked over at her, and sighed. “It might be a little scary the first time…” He said.

She ignored him, and just looked out the window, grasping the armrest on the seat.

He did smile a little at her amazed gasp as the plane lifted from the ground after building up enough momentum. Her nose was practically glued to the window as the plane climbed higher and higher. When they passed through a random, bright white cloud she let out an awed sigh.

Joshua sat back in his seat, at least glad that Amy was enjoying herself so much. He closed his eyes to rest. It would be a long flight.

. . . . ::: fIrst In A lOng tImE ::: . . . .

Amy had been looking out the window for nearly an hour now, and started to bore of it. She sighed and looked back into the plane. A stewardess rolled a little cart next to their seats, and smiled. “Anything to drink, ma’am?” She asked. Joshua had fallen asleep.

Amy blinked, and thought for a few seconds. “Um, lemonade will be fine, and he’ll have some water, with two ice cubes-.” She realized she’d unknowingly brought something up from the past. She looked down as she woman smiled and handed the drinks over.

Amy and Joshua were playing another game; they were on the airplane, heading to Ethiopia.

“What will you get to drink on the airplane, Joshua?” Amy had asked as they sat next to each other on the ground, the imaginary plane cutting them off from the rest of the world.

Joshua smiled over at the young girl, and said with his hands on his hips, “A Water. With exactly two ice cubes. Every time.”

Amy laughed and hugged her playmate and best friend. “I don’t know what I would get! Maybe a lemonade… or water with two ice cubes, like you!”

The scene had been so long ago… she’d been eight at the time.

A few minutes later, she was feeling sleepy. She yawned, and sat back in her seat. They weren’t all that comfortable… but they were in the first class section, so they were better than the other ones. She sighed, lost in the past for a few seconds, and closed her eyes to sleep before she remembered things that would make her upset.

Before long she was asleep.

A jolt in the plane made Joshua wake up, and he looked around. He looked down.

There was a cup of water on his tray… with two ice cubes.

He looked at Amy, asleep next to him, and smiled warmly. So there was still something… He still had a chance.

He took the cup of water and sipped at it slowly, leaning his head back on the seat.

A pressure on his right shoulder made him smile. Amy’s shoulder had fallen to rest on him. It brought him back to all those times she’d sat up with him in his bed, then fallen asleep on his shoulder.

He reached over and stroked her hair gently.

This was the first time he’d felt like this in a long time.

. . . . ::: fIrst shOt ::: . . . .

As the plane landed, Amy clung to the armrest. Everything was shaking so much! Joshua looked over at her and smiled. “It’ll be okay. It will be bumpy, though.” He wanted to tell her she could hold his hand like she used to when she was nervous…

But she would just huff and look away from him.

“I-I’m alright.”

The plane finally landed, and before they knew it, they stood outside the airport in Abuja, Nigeria. Amy looked around in wonder, and up at the sun shining down on them. It was so hot! Her dress was almost too much of a burden. She rubbed her arm, where she’d been given a shot to prevent Malaria. That was the first shot she’d ever gotten that had hurt so much!

After that, they needed to go by bus South to a small village closer to the location of the sick birds. Amy was silent but so excited the whole ride. She looked out the windows eagerly, and even asked Joshua about some of the things she saw.

“I’m only asking you because I want to know, and the people here don’t speak English.” She was sure to remind him.

He smiled warmly when she looked away again, and nodded. Of course, Miss Amy.

The bus stopped, and they got out.

An old woman came out of a hut in the village, and greeted Joshua in a language Amy couldn’t understand. The two conversed for some time, while Amy stood next to Joshua looking around and feeling out of place.

When the old woman bowed and went back into her hut, Joshua turned to Amy with a smile. “They’ve got two huts ready for us to sleep in tonight. Tomorrow we’ll be heading to where the birds are, and staying there until we’re done.”

Amy nodded slowly, and continued to look around. This village was close to the Rainforest, and trees covered their heads. The village was in a clearing, so the sun shone down, but the shade was welcomed.

Joshua led her to a small hut near the edge of the village, and said, “This will be your hut, Miss Amy. I’ll bring your things for you-”

But Amy cut him off. “I can carry my own things, thank you very much.” She turned and walked away to get her bags. When two small children approached her, she panicked a little, not knowing what to say, but they just held out a small flower from the forest and ran away, shy. Amy looked after them, then down at the flower, and smiled.

Joshua, watching from the entrance of her hut, smiled also. He hadn’t seen that smile in so long…

She came back with her bags, the smile still on her face. And then she saw Joshua smiling at her, and remembered to frown.

Joshua sighed as she disappeared into the hut, and went to his own, next to hers.

. . . . ::: fIrst cOnfrOntAtIOn ::: . . . .

That night, the village had a party of sorts to welcome Joshua and Amy. There was a bonfire, a lot of food, and music with lots of drum and rhythm.

Amy was forced to talk to Joshua, when she needed to know what to do in order not to offend their hosts. And if she wished to talk to anyone, she needed to do it through Joshua.

At one point, the old woman from before walked up to Joshua, and placed in his hands a bracelet, saying a few words to him. Amy watched Joshua stare down at the bracelet, and then give the old woman a warm smile and a hug. She caught the word for “Thank you.”

She looked away when Joshua came back, but wanted so badly to ask him what that had been about. She remembered…

He held up the bracelet and smiled as Amy’s eyes went wide and shiny.

“These are bracelets made by one of the jungle tribes! There’s a special kind of bracelet for everything! This one means ‘little sister.’”

Amy looked away from the bracelet and at Joshua, and beamed from ear to ear.

She wondered what that new bracelet’s meaning was… but she pretended not to have seen it.

Before long, she’d fallen asleep by the fire. The time here was so much different than the time at home, and it felt as if it were in the middle of the night for her.

Joshua sat by her the whole night as the party wore down, and eventually carried her to her hut when he was let go by his friends here. He laid her on her bed and sighed, wishing so much that things could go back to how they’d been before he left.

He pulled the covers over her and kissed her forehead, then drew the bug net around her and zipped it up. He’d made the mistake long ago of thinking he didn’t need that net…

But the Doctor had made sure to zip his up when he fell asleep.

He sighed as he remembered, and left Amy’s hut.

The next morning, when Amy woke up and found the net around her, she momentarily panicked. She didn’t know where she was or what this net was, and instinctively called out for Joshua.

He appeared in the door of her hut in seconds, alarmed. “Miss Amy! What is it?”

She realized where she was, and that she’d called for him, and crossed her arms. “N-nothing. I was just surprised is all…” She was looking away, and Joshua smiled and stepped up to unzip the net for her.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to wake you last night to explain the net to you.”

She stayed silent but shrugged.

“Anyways, these nets keep the bugs away while you sleep… for safety and for comfort. You don’t need to worry about it.”

She shrugged again, but looked over at him for once after a long pause. “Hey, Joshua…?”

“Yes, Miss Amy?” She could see the elation in his eyes.

She looked down and was silent for a few moments more. “Did you really mean it when you said you loved me…?” She needed to know. Even with her heart hardened as it was, the feelings of old were surfacing.

Joshua sat on the edge of the bed and took her hands in his. She almost flinched away. “I swear on your father’s grave, I meant it, Miss Amy.”

Amy’s eyes started to water, and she balled up her fists in pained anger. “Then why on Earth did you leave me for so long-?! Why did you not write? Why did you have to make me love you so much it hurt when you were away, and then betray me?” She pounded his chest with her balled up fist.

“I… Miss Amy…” Joshua couldn’t think of an answer for her. He himself didn’t know why he ever left her side. But he’d needed to… if he hadn’t, he would never have done the things he did…

Amy took the silence as admitting that he was wrong in loving her, and told him to leave. “Get out.” She pointed at the door, tears still in her eyes.

Joshua reached for her hand and pleaded with his eyes. “I said get out!” Amy turned away from him and he sighed, heartbroken. He stood up slowly and left her, feeling miserable.

. . . . ::: fIrst AdvEntUrE ::: . . . .

By the time they needed to leave for the depths of the jungle, Amy had calmed down; but she still would not speak with Joshua. Every time he tried to say something to her, she turned away, and every time he approached, she left. Joshua regretted having said nothing.

The short drive to the small camp in the middle of the rainforest was silent even though Amy was getting more excited by the minute.

The rest of the morning was spent setting things up at the camp and planning the rest of the week or more they would be spending there. When they finally were ready to start working, Amy consented to talking to Joshua, but only about the notes she had memorized. He would ask her about something in them, and she would answer quickly and say no more as Joshua wrote things down in his own notebook.

They had three birds with them, kept in cages on the campsite. They all had the sickness that was plaguing the species. After one day of mixing and testing and recalculating, one of the birds had died. The medicine from last time hadn’t worked, of course. So Joshua mixed and calculated some more, and looked through his microscope at a sample of the virus.

As Joshua worked, Amy looked. She watched the birds that were not yet infected, and once managed to tempt one of them closer to her. She enjoyed herself for the most part, even though Joshua was there. She didn’t like to admit it to herself or to Joshua, but watching him work so diligently made her want to fall in love with him all over again. He was just the same as he’d always been.

But that was the problem, wasn’t it? The way he’d been was a lie… but the him from before was who she’d always loved…

She was so confused…

But she loved being in the jungle. She’d wanted to go on a real adventure since the first time her father had told her a story about the Amazon. For so long, she’d dreamed of being where the animals in her picture books were. Most of those dreams had included Joshua.

She tried not to think about those things most of the time they spent in the jungles.

By the time five days had passed, another of the birds they had had died, and Joshua felt like he was so close to finding the cure… Amy had been crying over the dead birds, and that made him want to find the cure all the more soon.

And then… on the sixth morning, as he tested the latest solution on a sample of the virus, he stood up.

This one should work…! He caught the last bird, which was looking the worse for wear, and injected the medicine.

. . . . ::: fIrst And OnlY ::: . . . .

Within an hour, the bird was showing signs of recovery, and Joshua was hopeful. In three hours, it was eating normally again and had good vital signs.

Joshua rushed out of the work area and called out to Amy, “Miss Amy! I’ve found it!” He grinned and waved it in the air. She looked up from where she sat by a fallen bird, and smiled. He’d been hoping to see the smile. He’d been hoping for more than that, but the smile was good enough for him.

Together they injected about fifty birds with the new medicine, and gave enough of it to cure all of the sick birds to a man who would be sure to distribute it amongst the rest of the birds. Joshua grinned, as their work was done and the sun was setting, but swayed slightly where he stood. He hadn’t taken notice of it because of the heat, but he’d been feeling a bit clammy last night. He’d ignored it until now, and now it was getting worse…

Amy was reading a book in the tent when she heard a thump and a clang from outside. She stood up and peeked out, and gasped when she saw Joshua on the ground.

He was trying to get up, but seemed to be getting weak.

Suddenly Amy’s heart tightened up; it hurt. “Joshua…!” She ran out of the hut and knelt next to him. “Joshua, are you alright?” She asked, anxious.

Joshua opened his eyes slightly, and smiled. “Yes, yes I’m alright…” But even as he said it, Amy saw how bad he was.

She put her hand to his forehead but took it away hastily. “Joshua, you’re burning up!”

He feebly brushed his hand in the air. “Oh, it’s nothing… I’ll be fine…” He didn’t even have the strength to sit up.

Amy frowned and hoisted him up, wobbling under his weight but managing to get him to the bed he’d slept in for the last week. “Joshua… you’re not okay!” She said and got a wet towel to wipe the sweat off his forehead.

“Miss Amy… It’s Malaria…”

Amy froze. No… no, it can’t be Malaria-! First Papa… now Joshua… No! She shook her head frantically, not wanting to believe what Joshua said. The tears came, and she rushed to his side to hug him tight.

“No, Joshua you CAN’T! You can’t have Malaria! You can’t leave me again-!” Just when she’d been thinking she could forgive him for leaving her… just when her heart was softening, after four years of quick hardening. Just when she’d realized she’d never stopped loving Joshua… He was her first and only love.

She cried and she clung to his shirt, shaking her head and not able to think of anything but life without Joshua.

His hand rested on her head, and Joshua frowned softly. “Don’t… don’t look like that, Miss Amy…” He wiped some of the tears away from her cheeks, but couldn’t do much more. The Malaria was quick. Much quicker than it had been for the Doctor.

Amy shook her head again. “No! I don’t want to lose you again, Joshua!”

He smiled at her and stroked her cheek. “Miss Amy… on the bench… in the top drawer… It’s in the blue phial. Get a clean needle… put that in my arm, Miss Amy…”

She frowned and shook her head. “I can’t-! I don’t know how to do that! Will it even help you, Joshua?!” She didn’t know of any cure for Malaria. Nothing she could do now would save him…

“Just do it… Amy…”

Amy nearly choked on her sobs. He’d called her Amy… just Amy. She’d longed to hear that since the moment she heard his voice. “Joshua!” She cried as she ran to the desk and opened the top drawer, hands shaking as they took out the blue phial. She found a clean needle in the drawer below that and rushed back to Joshua’s side. His breathing was heavy and unsteady, and Amy’s hands shook more as she fumbled with the bottle and the needle.

She’d seen Joshua using the needles before… she just needed to do what he did. Stick it into the bottle... draw back the little pump… “How much, Joshua?!” She knew about overdosing… and about not having enough… it had to be just right.

“Half… half the…” Before he could finish, Amy had half the syringe full of the liquid from the bottle. Without thinking she drove the needle into his arm and could only hope she got the right spot and the right dose, and that she wasn’t too late. She pushed the liquid through and into him, and then took his hand in hers.

“Joshua, don’t you dare leave me again…!” She was back to sobbing now that the work was done.

Joshua raised his hand to stroke the hair out of her face, but his hand shook. “Amy… don’t cry… never cry.” His words were slow and painful, and he closed his eyes and his hand dropped to his side.

Amy sobbed and clutched his hand in hers tighter than ever. “Don’t leave me… Don’t leave me again…!”

PaRT HuiT :// oNCe aGaiN

. . . . ::: thE End ::: . . . .

Joshua slowly opened his eyes. It was nighttime. He tried to sit up but his back hurt, so he just looked around. Amy was next to him. She held his hand and her cheek rested on it. Then he remembered… bits and pieces from that evening were blurry… but everything with her in it was clear as day.

He remembered how she’d been so worried about him, and he wanted to cry at the thought of her tears.

He squeezed her hand slightly, and she started awake. Her eyes met his, and she cried out in relief, lunging at him with a tight embrace.

“Joshua-!” She couldn’t even begin to explain all her anxieties and her thoughts. There was just too much she wanted to say.

Joshua lifted his arm and wrapped it around her. “Shhh, don’t cry, Miss Amy… I’m alright. You saved me.”

She shook her head, which was buried in his chest. “You almost… I was so scared!”

He smiled and hugged her tight, finding the strength somehow to sit up against the metal bars that made the backboard of the cot he slept in. “I know you were… Shhh, everything is okay now.”

Amy was silent for some time, and they just stayed in each other’s arms for a long time. Then, a quiet, “Joshua… I’m so sorry!” And Amy started to cry again.

Joshua shook his head, stroking her hair. “No, you’ve got nothing to be sorry for, Miss Amy.” He was so glad she was talking to him once again. So happy he wanted to cry too. “Miss Amy, you’ve got nothing to be sorry for… I’m the one who needs to be sorry.” He held her up closer to him. He didn’t admit how scared he’d actually been last night that the last thing he would see was Amy’s crying face.

Amy sniffed a few times and then looked up at him. “But… but how? I thought there wasn’t a cure for Malaria yet…?”

Joshua smiled and wiped the drying tears off of Amy’s face. “You really didn’t read the papers, did you…?”

He smiled again at her puzzled look, and asked her to go to his bag and get the paper that was in the front right pocket. She brought it to him, and he unfolded it to the front page.

The headline read, “Long Awaited Cure for Malaria Discovered.”

She read on, and then looked up at Joshua, shocked. “Wh… what? Is this what you were doing all that time…?”

Joshua looked down and nodded. “It took four years, but I found it… I just wish I’d started four years sooner.” Amy looked down as well now, and they both stayed silent for some time, remembering the Doctor. “But… no one will have to go through loosing someone to that sickness again,” he said, holding Amy’s hand.

Amy leaned her head on Joshua’s shoulder, and cried again, the reality of how close Joshua had been to dying once again sinking in.

“Hey, I’m not going anywhere, Miss Amy. Don’t cry…” He stroked her hair softly.

“Just… just never leave me again… you have to promise!”

Joshua smiled and nodded. “I promise… Amy. Never again.”

She smiled and wiped the tears but they wouldn’t stop now that she was started.

“Amy…” Joshua hugged her tight still. “Amy… could you get my jacket and bring it over here?” She nodded and slowly got up, bringing his jacket to him. He reached into the right hand pocket and pulled out the bracelet that the old lady had given him.

“Amy, you remember that bracelet I gave you, so long ago…?”

She nodded. How could she ever forget it?

“I’m afraid I’ll need that one back… it’s meaning- it just isn’t right. This one… hopefully this one will be more appropriate?”

Amy was loath to part with that gift from Joshua from so long ago, but she was curious. “What’s that one’s meaning?”

Joshua smiled, looking down, and then took her hands in his again and looked her in the eyes. “It means life partner… spouse… wife. Amy, I will not be able to live in peace unless you’re by my side always, forever, until the end of our days… Will you marry me, Amy?”

She was crying harder than ever, tears of joy, and nodded so fast she nearly gave herself whiplash. She hugged her first and only love and didn’t ever want to let go.

T h e . E n d
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20 / F / somewhere you don...
Posted 9/20/09 , edited 9/21/09
is this the end? it feels like a cliff hanger. But poor amy she so sad cause of him
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26 / F / In my own little...
Posted 9/20/09 , edited 9/21/09
Oohh, whoops ^^ forgot abotu the Moor Soon >___<
No, it's not the end ^^
there is moreee >w<
But it might not be happy, still don't know how it'll end .__.
Posted 9/23/09 , edited 9/24/09
-throws JOshua off cliff-
-which i thoughts @ first wen you DIDNT put teh 'more soon'-
I was like......'waaaaaait, this is a kind of SAD ending I would write'
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Posted 9/23/09 , edited 9/24/09
Nuuu you can't throw teh main guy off a cliff XD
*catches Joshua in a trampoline*
but lol I was expecting this kind of reaction from some of you =w=
Posted 9/24/09 , edited 9/25/09
-havent read teh chapter you just added tho- o-O
Posted 9/24/09 , edited 9/25/09

-throws firecrackers @ Joshua-
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26 / F / In my own little...
Posted 9/24/09 , edited 9/25/09
wow =w=
You hates him don't you XD
I should write the rest / more of this!! but tomorrow or something XD It's late now >____<
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Posted 9/25/09 , edited 9/25/09
OMG!!!*suffocates joshua* what happened hes killing her from the inside out!!
Posted 9/25/09 , edited 9/26/09

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Posted 9/25/09 , edited 9/26/09
I should finish typing up the next part so I can put it up XDD
You guys will laugh when it gets to this one part =w= I just KNOW it.
But that's not for another two or so parts I THINK... maybe right after this next one =w=
Posted 9/25/09 , edited 9/26/09

And wha....waits this about 'the papers'?? O.o
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Posted 9/25/09 , edited 9/26/09
You shall seeeee >w<
It's gonna be epic >:3

And lol it took a bit for me to realize what you meant by what's 'the papers'
But yeah.
That you shall see as well SOOON >:D
Posted 9/25/09 , edited 9/26/09
I SCROLLED DOWN AND SAW, "Why the HELL are you here Joshua?! How dare you show your face in this house!"
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Posted 9/25/09 , edited 9/26/09
wow =w=
That's why I avoid scrolling down too far XDD
I don't like to spoil things =w=
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