Posted 5/10/11 , edited 5/11/11

All through my life i've been alone. Since the first day of school to my last year of college. Not that i am complaining, as i've always did my best and kept a happy face. I sit here now, at 21 and realise, i've nobody to tell this to except you cr, This one comfort zone, where i can come after a bad day and laugh with those of you alike.

I've been diagnosed with cancer and im at the last few days, less even. I can feel it. I wish this feeling upon no one and yet here i am, experiencing it for myself. Getting weaker for no reason. Its a feeling hard to describe, as i can feel myself "slipping" simply, scared to sleep and when i do start to drift i twitch myself awake, as i know it could very well be the last time i breathe, or look around at others laying in their beds, or even smile while posting. I'm scared, because i know there is nothing more after this.

So here i am to say this. Thank you, my friends. Its a shame i've never gotten close to another, but thank you for all the laughter you've given me, thank you for being there when others were not. Thank you. My only regret is not having the chance to hold other, make them laugh and hold their hand.

Goodbye my friends, i truly mean it. Look after yourselves.

How does CR feel about death. Do you wonder if you will wake up?
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19 / M / boys locker room
Posted 5/10/11 , edited 5/11/11
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