Saiyan Coffee
10361 cr points
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25 / M / California
Posted 3/25/14 , edited 3/26/14
Above a table in an office break room, a lone patron sits, dipping his purple lips into a mug reading “# 1 tyrant” on the side. He pulls his Windsor knot tight as he stares up at the clock as numbers wheel into place. Another high power level was drawing near. Vegeta crashed through the ceiling, his tie loose, and his sport coat was still hanging from his brief case. He stumbled over to the coffee pot in the corner, brushing debris from his shirt. Freeza looked up from his mug to the Saiyan as he inched further toward the pot. “I hope you do realize those upper ten ceilings are coming out of your paycheck”
“c-coffee coffee coffee.”
Freeza knew he wouldn’t get much out of Vegeta this early in the morning. Well, I suppose I can just have Nappa arrange for you to conquer a couple of gas giants to cover the damages.”
“I’ll get right on it. Just as soon as I have my coffee” Vegeta stammered. “Just wait for my second cup, and I’ll have those planets tidied up for you.” A door beneath the clock slides apart, revealing Goku, eyes sagging, and fully suited up in a freshly pressed traveler’s suit.
Freeza chimed, “Ah, Goku. Just in time for coffee, and you entered sensibly.”
“I didn’t want to miss out on the last couple of cups of King Kai’s special blend. I’m only allowed one bag per death!”
“I bet Krillan has hundreds.” Remarked Freeza
Vegeta swallowed, shouting from the break room that jib made today Krillan’s nine-thousandth Burnaversery. As the last drinkable drops of coffee left his mug, he was greeted with a flood of liquefied coffee grounds. Goku caught sight of Vegeta inching towards the coffee pot. He stood to defend the last of his King Kai coffee.
“Vegeta, that’s my coffee, and besides you died once. Didn’t you get some King Kai coffee?”
“No Kakarot, I didn’t make it past the stupid red guy before you decided to wish me back! Now out of my way! Your prince demands it!”
For both of the bickering Saiyans though, it was too late, Freeza, mug in hand, teleported to the coffee pot. “You dirty monkeys don’t seem to understand. This isn’t even my final cup.”
Freeza poured the last of King Kai’s blend, and stirred in the fleeting drops of Goku’s creamer. Vegeta collapsed to the table, mug still in hand. His tired eyes stared motionless at the empty pot. “No. It’s… it’s not possible. I can’t. I can’t work without another cup. It’s over Kakarot.” Vegeta sobbed “We have to punch in now!”
Goku looked to Freeza as he cackled over the last cup. His cup. The clock’s numbers whirled into an unreadable storm of digits as a burning yellow aura engulfed the half-caffeinated Goku. His hair flickered yellow. His suit fluttered about and his shirt tore as the surging power expanded his muscles. Looking to Freeza with aqua eyes, he shouted “You drink my coffee, Use my creamer, and you expect me to punch in?!”
“Now now Goku. Let’s not get carried away.”
“Oh, I will carry- Vegeta off to STARBUUUUUUCKS!”
He tore hole through the ceiling adjacent to Vegetas, knocking Gildo off his balance as he flew through.
“That’s coming out of your paycheck you dirty monkey!”
Sailor Candy Moderator
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Posted 12/22/15 , edited 12/23/15
"Year-end cleanup. Closing threads with no activity since 2014."
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